AIBU to deduct stolen money from payment?

[cocoloco117]

Name changed and tin hat on for this. We recently had someone working in our house, after which I noticed a large sum of money had gone missing. It was a pile of notes that was left under an ornament on a bookshelf in the room in which they were working. Now I don’t need any lectures on the follies of leaving large sums of money lying around the house, stupidly I forgot to move it before they came. But whilst it is a stupid thing to do, does that mean I deserve to be robbed?

No one else has been in the house in the time between when the cash was last definitely seen and when it disappeared, apart from me DH DCs and none of us took/moved it. I haven’t raised this with the company, yet, as it will be an extraordinary awkward conversation. And what would the response be? The worker’s undoubtedly going to deny it so it comes down to my word against theirs.

I was about to let it go and chalk it up to bad experience. But since the day of the work/theft, there’s been a few other issues so we haven't paid the invoice yet. In that time I have spent stewing over it, searching the place upside down and thinking about who else could have been in the house or what else could have happened. Post-stew I am now certain that the only explanation can be that it was taken by the worker. Would it be unreasonable to unilaterally deduct the amount stolen from the invoice and tell them to recover the rest from their light-fingered employee?

I’m almost set on this course of action now, but I’m after a sanity check via the unique brand of constructive criticism only available on MN. So: AIBU to proverbially cancel the cheque?

Thanks in advance but I don’t need any elaborate hypotheticals asking whether the cat/dog/baby might have eaten/buried/hidden it. They haven’t. And tell me that I’m wrong if you like but I am convinced the only reasonable explanation is that it’s been stolen.

Yes I am 100% sure DC haven’t taken it.

OK but not even approximate ages?

I agree. I know for a fact my AC stole from me and has never admitted to this day, it certainly hurts your heart.

The bill and the loss of the money are 2 completely different issues.

You should have asked the workman about it as soon as you realised the money was missing.

How long ago did you notice it missing?
what age are your children?

I honestly think you need to learn from your mistake and move on.

You could….
ring company

”I’m just letting you know I have cctv in the house. One of your workers took something by mistake can you ask them to return it- post it if needs be”

….wait….

Unless you can absolutely prove without any question of doubt that one of the person doing the work/workers stole the money you are now unable to find, you are being completely out of order to even consider deducting the missing money from the payment.

If your dcs are older, ie not primary school,then I wouldn’t totally discount the fact they haven’t taken the money. We all like to think that our dcs would never steal, but there’s always a small chance that we could be wrong. And for that reason I wouldn’t feel absolutely comfortable accusing the worker. I would assume he would be very aware that he would be the number one suspect if he did take the money.

I would not do this.

Completely unreasonable. Chances are one of your kids has snatched it.

This should have been mentioned to the business owner in private as soon as you realised. He would have known his employee movements on the day and if there was an opportunity at all for an employee to have taken it.

either or, you do not leave valuables out when having strangers in your home. If you claim on insurance do you have proof you even had the money?

in summary though no you cannot deduct it from the agreed cost of work. What a terrible thing to even think of doing to someone who is quite likely innocent and knows nothing of the theft and is just going about his work as best as he can..

How old are your DC? Just that when my second was 6 I would have assumed the same as you, but it turned out she had “taken” the missing item. At 20 she’s an incredible young woman, but I’ll never get over how she managed to lie to me so confidently - there was a not a whisper of guilt at only 6 years old even though I’d already searched through her room and found my mother’s missing necklace. It took 3 hours (including 2 hours AFTER after telling her we’d found it in her bedroom) for her to finally ‘crack’. Me! I’d have been admitting it after 10 minutes regardless of whether I’d taken it or not. It was only the threat of telling her infant school head teacher that finally resulted in anything close to contrition. She’s gone on to be an amazing young woman, but I’ll never forget that steely resolve and her ability to lie to me so effectively!

I was convinced I'd asked my daughter to hide my wedding rings/pandora bracelet on the top shelf of our tall bookcase. When I went to get them, only the bracelet was there, not the rings. The only person that could have seen them was our decorator and his new young trainee. We'd used this decorator for years, I went through agonies thinking that the trainee had taken them - but a few months later found my rings in my daughter's winter suitcase, inside her Ugg boots.

Without evidence it is better left unsaid, I hope you can get them to work to standard.

Tell the company that you had money stolen by their employee. Tell them you will be calling the police unless the money is returned immediately…. Then call police.

I would discuss your suspicions with the company and tell them you want the money returned either by them threatening the employee with deducting his wages for that amount or the company taking the hit and knocking it off your bill. I wouldn’t just deduct the amount without giving them chance to rectify it!

You don't actually know their employee took it though because you didn't see it happen, you've no proof it happened and you're making an assumption that it was them. Is an assumption enough to lose someone their job? I don't think so. This is your own fault for leaving it out though I do think you should have been able to do that in good faith. However the employee is not the only person who's been in your house so you can't say for absolute definite that it was them. So yanu do not do that. What you could do is speak to the company, say you've noticed this and you haven't reported it because you've no proof and you've spoken to your family and they're saying nobody touched it and you're making them aware. If they've had concerns about their employee before this will fill in the jigsaw without you directly accusing as you have to accept you've no hard proof.

S/he has absolutely no proof they/he did steal the money, and s/he cannot go around threatening businesses (esp at the end of the job, not when the ''theft'' occurred) and/or its employees.

The type of people who do this sort of shite are the people who never intended to pay for the work to begin with, and in this day and age, this sort of behaviour is increasing. S/he will end up in Court or being chased by debt collectors for failing to pay (at best), at worst the tradesperson may well remove all of their work and materials. Who benefits then?

It's quite possible a family member has thought to put it away while the tradespeople are there, but hasn't passed on to the others they have done this.

All s/he can do is say to the business owner, would you have seen X under such and such because I stupidly left it there and now its gone...

I lost a large amount of money quite recently and could not find it anywhere. I posted on here about it. I was starting to think that the facebook buyer who brought the money had somehow swiped it back when they were leaving ( they had been in my house for quite a while). Questioned DH and DC. Found it a week later in the box of dog stuff!
No idea who that happened . I'd keep looking.

Yes, and you'd be surprised how many lovely adults did some very dodgy things when they were kids ( myself included). It's almost part of growing up. Check your kids rooms, and take everything off the bookshelf.

Didn’t report it before because as you’re all saying I can’t prove it

You cannot prove it! Anyine can pull a stunt like this, get a company in to do work, claim they've left a wodge of cash on the bedside table and accuse one of the workmen of stealing, then deduct the "stolen" cash from their invoice.

You're in cloud cuckooland.

Report it to the company, saying that you have not yet reported it to the Police.. If they don't respond, report to Police.
It is a good lesson for you but also the company needs feedback if it is to employ reputable people.

Now I don’t need any lectures on the follies of leaving large sums of money lying around the house, stupidly I forgot to move it before they came. But whilst it is a stupid thing to do, does that mean I deserve to be robbed?

So you know what you did was idiotic and careless. You know you shouldn't leave money around, and now the shit has hit the fan and you'd rather point the finger at an innocent person and make them pay for your lack of care.

think about a time in the future if and when the money shows up (things don't evaporate into thin air) - can you honestly say you'll contact the company and fess up that it was your fault all along and you'd accused them and their staff of being thieving liars? Or will that be when they take you to court for non-payment of work they've done in good faith.

You can't not pay the invoice. You can't prove they took the money. Worse still you haven't even reported such an accusation to the company of the invoicing so they currently have no idea.

Imagine if your employer didn't pay your monthly salary at the month-end, because apparently someone had reported that you'd stolen something. of which you had no idea.It's just not on.

Your lack of logic is staggering. Do the right thing. Do things in the correct order at least.

Hos old.are the dc and how are you 100% sure they haven't taken it?

Were the doors.to house ever open when the work.was going on? Eg sometimes front doors are left open when work requires.constant to-ing and froi-ng in and out the house - opportunists are good at sneaking in for a quick pilfer.

How much money was it?

And when they inevitably ask to see this video evidence, that I don’t have, what should I say then? This post supports what I keep saying; schools should teach critical thinking.

Because I can feel everyone desperately itching to say “aha, it was the kids” and share their anecdotes of how they thought they’d lost xyz and their teen had … bla bla bla.
But. It. Was. Not. The. Kids.

I think I’ve got the answers I needed here so thanks to all who’ve responded. Will update if the money turns up (one way or another).