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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to deduct stolen money from payment?

181 replies

cocoloco117 · 24/04/2023 15:21

Name changed and tin hat on for this. We recently had someone working in our house, after which I noticed a large sum of money had gone missing. It was a pile of notes that was left under an ornament on a bookshelf in the room in which they were working. Now I don’t need any lectures on the follies of leaving large sums of money lying around the house, stupidly I forgot to move it before they came. But whilst it is a stupid thing to do, does that mean I deserve to be robbed?

No one else has been in the house in the time between when the cash was last definitely seen and when it disappeared, apart from me DH DCs and none of us took/moved it. I haven’t raised this with the company, yet, as it will be an extraordinary awkward conversation. And what would the response be? The worker’s undoubtedly going to deny it so it comes down to my word against theirs.

I was about to let it go and chalk it up to bad experience. But since the day of the work/theft, there’s been a few other issues so we haven't paid the invoice yet. In that time I have spent stewing over it, searching the place upside down and thinking about who else could have been in the house or what else could have happened. Post-stew I am now certain that the only explanation can be that it was taken by the worker. Would it be unreasonable to unilaterally deduct the amount stolen from the invoice and tell them to recover the rest from their light-fingered employee?

I’m almost set on this course of action now, but I’m after a sanity check via the unique brand of constructive criticism only available on MN. So: AIBU to proverbially cancel the cheque?

Thanks in advance but I don’t need any elaborate hypotheticals asking whether the cat/dog/baby might have eaten/buried/hidden it. They haven’t. And tell me that I’m wrong if you like but I am convinced the only reasonable explanation is that it’s been stolen.

OP posts:
PrincessScarlett · 24/04/2023 16:49

So you think someone stole from you but you continued to let them into your house? Sorry but this should have been raised immediately with the police and the company. Police won't be interested because most people would not let a thief back into their house.

Vexar · 24/04/2023 16:52

You can't be completely sure so I would be very careful to bang on about someone being a thief. They're probably a thief but what if you've got something wrong?

Anyway, it's done now. Without proof you can't expect the company to get cash out of their employees. Can you imagine if this was common practice and everyone tried it?

You need to let it go. The police won't want to know.

AgentJohnson · 24/04/2023 16:52

Off course you can’t! It would be very sus if you tried, you can’t prove how much or by whom the money was stolen.

comingintomyown · 24/04/2023 16:52

If it was a large sum of money what’s it’s doing under an ornament ?
Your thread title is misleading you don’t know the money was stolen and no of course you can’t arbitrarily decide to knock it off your bill having not even politely asked at the same if any of the workers might have known something about it.

TheYearOfSmallThings · 24/04/2023 16:53

You pay the company and you call the police, obviously.

Chocolatepancakes11 · 24/04/2023 16:53

Unless you have actual evidence of the theft, I would pay the invoice in full as you otherwise leave yourself open to the company taking you to small claims court, which could result in a CCJ.

Does your house insurance cover loss of cash (as ultimately that’s what this is as you don’t have proof)?

PollyAmour · 24/04/2023 17:01

Pay the bill, report the theft to the police and prepare for your children to be accused.

Fandabedodgy · 24/04/2023 17:05

You need to report this to the police and the company asap.

Psychonabike · 24/04/2023 17:05

I don't think you can reasonably deduct it, while not being prepared to report the theft. There are no half measures here. You either suspect them and involve the police (in which case CAB may advise you on what proportion is reasonable to pay until the matter is resolved). Or you simply pay them.

In real life I would actually give them a chance to graciously avoid criminal proceedings:

"I can see a large sum of money was taken from X on XX/XX/XX. I assume that, given where I had left it, Y assumed this was part payment. Shall I deduct this from the total invoiced? If this isn't the case, please let me know so that I can report the theft to the police."

If you want to be extra mischievous, and are certain of your perception of events, you could add: "If this isn't the case, please let me know as I'll then have to go through hours of CCTV to work out what happened and report the missing money to the police".

But honestly, be sure. Strange things happen and we're all fallable.

Mirabai · 24/04/2023 17:08

Of course you can’t, if you’re wrong you’re underpaying someone for someone else’s crime or misplacement.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 24/04/2023 17:10

If you think they have stolen it, you need to report to police.

Otherwise they could accuse you of failing to pair their agreed rate.

Do you have any proof that they stole it? No.

Where is your head?

Report to the police first, then call the company. Or it just looks like you've made it up.

Elderflower14 · 24/04/2023 17:12

As others have said... Call the police and report it.

readbooksdrinktea · 24/04/2023 17:14

PrincessScarlett · 24/04/2023 16:49

So you think someone stole from you but you continued to let them into your house? Sorry but this should have been raised immediately with the police and the company. Police won't be interested because most people would not let a thief back into their house.

I don't understand this either tbh.

KittyAlfred · 24/04/2023 17:16

I would probably contact the company and tell them about the money, how it’s missing, how you’ve looked everywhere for it, how no one else could have taken it, and how you’re certain it was one of their employees. Explain that you’re planning to go to the police about it, and will await for police advice about paying the invoice. It may be that if there’s an ongoing investigation the police may suggested withholding payment for the time being.

We all know that in reality the police will do nothing but give you a crime number, but it’ll buy you some time. In the meantime, you could ask the company if they could speak to the employee in case he might have accidentally put the money in his pocket….. The money might miraculously reappear.

Also can you claim insurance on these things? I don’t know.

But you absolutely can’t just withhold the money because without any evidence or a crime number, they can presumably take you to the small claims court.

babyblueblanketlover · 24/04/2023 17:16

Why haven't you called the police?

Why didn't you raise it with the company?

You've no proof - you can't deduct it from the payment.

wrinkleintime · 24/04/2023 17:16

You can't just not pay. The course of action you're proposing will just result in the company prosecuting you to get the money.

What do you ultimately want to get out of this?

randomuser2019 · 24/04/2023 17:23

This reply has been withdrawn

This post has been withdrawn at the poster's request due to privacy concerns.

Jessstar · 24/04/2023 17:24

we had some money taken out of a wallet whilst workmen were in the house. I called the business owner the day we found it was missing. He was incredibly apologetic and investigated immediately. Turned out it was the apprentice. The apprentice did not come back to our house and the missing amount was taken off our bill even though the apprentice never admitted to the amount he has taken. My point is that you surely need to raise this and give them the opportunity to solve the issue? Or go to the police?

BotterMon · 24/04/2023 17:35

Report to police and get a crime number. Report to company and let them deal with it. Pay invoice when resolved.

You've got to give them the opportunity to investigate!

I had €600 holiday cash taken when my cleaner brought her son over (unbeknownst to me at the time) and left him in the living room while she cleaned. He obviously went through drawers etc and found it - it was hidden in passports in a travel folder. As they were the only outsiders who had been here I asked and they denied it. Fired her on the spot as would never have let her scummy son in my house as he was a known arsonist, a nasty piece of work and had done time (as had most of her kids so it transpired).

Now have a safe!

JenWillsiam · 24/04/2023 17:39

You could but if they take you to court you will lose and be required to make payment.

You need to report the theft to the police and to company. But you cannot just randomly withhold payment.

whynotwhatknot · 24/04/2023 17:45

no youve got no proof and even so you never raised it straight away sounds a bit suss-just pay the bill

sweeneytoddsrazor · 24/04/2023 17:46

The money may have been moved, or stolen, or not there in the first place. Your DH, or DC wouldn't be the first or last to steal money left lying around. You wouldn't be the first or last to pretend something has been stolen in order to avoid full payment or make an insurance claim. It is also possible the worker left the door open whilst loading or unloading a van and an opportunistic theif nipped in and grabbed it.

Zakana69 · 24/04/2023 17:50

The alleged theft was not committed by the company, only their employee allegedly. Unfortunately, you have no evidence and therefore, you’ll have to chalk this one up as an experience you wouldn’t want to repeat. It may be that their employee has light fingers, but that is not the fault of the company and there is no evidence that a crime has been committed against you. I think even the police would have a head scratcher over this one!

Smartiepants79 · 24/04/2023 17:50

You did nothing about the theft when it happened. You didn’t report it to the police or even to this person’s employer. The company you owe money to know nothing about it and you’ve given them no chance to rectify it.
You also can’t prove it even if you’re 100% correct.
If you don’t pay the money you they can sue you and they’ll win.
Do you think they’re just going to it bother getting it and leave you alone?

Ididntnickyourring · 24/04/2023 18:04

How long ago was this, apologies if I’ve missed it?

I was once accused of stealing a ring from a property. Apparently it had been left on the kitchen windowsill and they were 100% sure it was me. They rang my employers (who trusted I hadn’t done it). I asked the clients to report it to the police if they believed that to be the case - who obviously NFA’d it as there were multiple keyholders. They had even asked the police to search my house!

This was years ago but I can remember how angry I was. It REALLY pissed me off - they assumed it was me as I was “just a cleaner” on minimum wage. I know I sound like a dick saying this next bit but I was only working for a few months to save up for a surprise holiday, I didn’t wear my own jewellery to work but had enough of my own (inherited) that it needed a stand alone insurance policy/house safe fitted, so I didn’t want to nick their fucking Pandora ring (no offence to Pandora, I have a small Pandora heart ring myself 😂) It was just the assumption that the cleaner must have done it.

They did have the grace to contact my employers a few months later when it turned out the ring had been found and had rolled behind a kickboard with no apparent gap. I wasn’t even working there but my ex boss kindly called me to tell me. I employ lone workers myself and always advise them to act as though there is CCTV camera recording their every move (and these days there usually is to be fair!)