AIBU to deduct stolen money from payment?

[cocoloco117]

Name changed and tin hat on for this. We recently had someone working in our house, after which I noticed a large sum of money had gone missing. It was a pile of notes that was left under an ornament on a bookshelf in the room in which they were working. Now I don’t need any lectures on the follies of leaving large sums of money lying around the house, stupidly I forgot to move it before they came. But whilst it is a stupid thing to do, does that mean I deserve to be robbed?

No one else has been in the house in the time between when the cash was last definitely seen and when it disappeared, apart from me DH DCs and none of us took/moved it. I haven’t raised this with the company, yet, as it will be an extraordinary awkward conversation. And what would the response be? The worker’s undoubtedly going to deny it so it comes down to my word against theirs.

I was about to let it go and chalk it up to bad experience. But since the day of the work/theft, there’s been a few other issues so we haven't paid the invoice yet. In that time I have spent stewing over it, searching the place upside down and thinking about who else could have been in the house or what else could have happened. Post-stew I am now certain that the only explanation can be that it was taken by the worker. Would it be unreasonable to unilaterally deduct the amount stolen from the invoice and tell them to recover the rest from their light-fingered employee?

I’m almost set on this course of action now, but I’m after a sanity check via the unique brand of constructive criticism only available on MN. So: AIBU to proverbially cancel the cheque?

Thanks in advance but I don’t need any elaborate hypotheticals asking whether the cat/dog/baby might have eaten/buried/hidden it. They haven’t. And tell me that I’m wrong if you like but I am convinced the only reasonable explanation is that it’s been stolen.

You can’t just withhold. You need to speak to the company first. Obviously it was a mistake. But you can’t just expect the company to let this large sun of money go on your say so.

@cocoloco117

Doubt I’ll get any joy out the police they not interested when the whole house gets robbed or people get assaulted.

You've reported a robbery and an assault and the police were not interested?

I think don't think you're being truthful.

Sorry OP, I know you said 'I don’t need any lectures on the follies of leaving large sums of money lying around the house' but at the end of the day having done this, you are being extremely unreasonable to blame someone without any proof, especially when your DH or DC's could just have easily taken the money in the hope you would blame the builder. You've also failed, in spite of being asked several times, how old your DC's are, to answer, which might tend to indicate that you have doubts about this possibility yourself. Kids, especially teens, can be EXTREMELY devious if they want to be, I know this from experience! Unfortunately, gut wrenching as it is, I think you have to swallow this one, and learn from it.

Thanks have thought about approaching it this way, but not sure about the cctv bin in case they call my bluff. If I had cctv then I’d have the evidence (or not) already.

What outcome do you want?

All that's going to happen withholding payment is a bunch of stress in small claims court and you'll lose there and have to pay anyway.

The “wide range of responses” was a joke, c’mon peeps.

So I can’t do anything because I haven’t got proof but I should have contacted the police despite not having any proof and the fact I searched the house for the money proves I don’t think it was stolen?

The reason I have been hesitant is because I know it’s hard to prove anything in situations these.

Will contact the company and see what they say. And police but am sure they won’t do anything.

They haven’t been back in.

The genuine hope the money turns up is why I’ve searched the house!!

Thanks, yes this is what I’ll do.

So I can’t do anything because I haven’t got proof but I should have contacted the police despite not having any proof and the fact I searched the house for the money proves I don’t think it was stolen?

You say it sarcastically, but yes, this! No proof, not willing to report to police due to no proof, so yes you need to pay your invoice.

You don't only report a theft to the police if you can prove who committed it.

If you give the facts to the police they may or may not be able to do something. For all you know the person you suspect is on probation for similar thefts.

Still no ages of the DC. Even approximate.

It's interesting that you have avoided the ages of your DC, can you be 100% sure they haven't taken it?

It's literally the police's job to find evidence or proof that points to the culprit.

Yes I am 100% sure DC haven’t taken it.

Were they not staying at the house when the workmen were in?

If you have no evidence, and either haven’t reported to the police or the police have found no evidence of theft, YABVU to deduct the money from what you owe

Your certainty that your DC haven’t taken it will likely not be shared by the police; it’s an understandable stance but not an objective one. You trust your DC over the builders but there’s no reason for anyone else to. That’s not to say your DC have taken it, just that you have more trust in them than an outsider would

How old are your children OP ?

unless they are 4 and under and couldn't possibly reach the money ?

I’d just call the police.

Difficult because you can't prove the money was ever there or that it's been taken. You should pay the bill but report the theft to the police and the company.

Might be best to claim on your insurance.

Get the police involved, and inform the police of your intentions of witholding part of the payment due to the theft.

To cover yourself.

There is no way you can be 100% sure of your DC

unless they're so small (eg under the age of 3) they'd have been physically unable to reach the ornament/money at all.

It's telling that despite being asked multiple times, you still haven't told us how old they are.

You haven't said anything to try to avoid a conversation but then want to deduct the money and say nothing? You do realise te worker who took the money is not the company you employed don't you?

Sorry, bonkers is the description I would use for your behaviour. This post supports what I keep saying; school should teach us how to have difficult conversations.

So now, you have to have that difficult conversation. Ask the manager to attend your house when the worker is present and have it out in front of them. Ask them in front of their manager where the money has gone. Be clear you will not involve the police if they are honest and intimate you have it on video.