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Original poster

To have slept with my best friends father in law at her wedding?

169 replies

Pillowfork · 23/04/2023 07:27

My best friend and her now DH got married yesterday- beautiful wonderful day it was perfect. She met him as I know his dad from work, there's an age gap but we've always got on well and one night out we saw him and his son out so I introduced my BF and it went from there.

Anyway, despite the age gap there's always been sexual tension between me and his dad (we are both single so no issue on that side). After the reception I asked if he wanted to come to my room- we were staying in the hotel where the reception was held as were most of the guests. One thing led to another and we had sex; bit of alcohol involved but both able to make a rational decision just got swept away I think.

No regrets in regard to sleeping with him, we both talked about it this morning and are both alright, no one else knows either (unless they were spying but ridiculously unlikely). But I feel really guilty- she's my best friend and I don't usually keep anything from her but obviously this I will. I'm just worried in case she does find out, I guess it didn't affect her day at all but dunno just overthinking maybe, is it that big of a deal in reality?!

OP posts:
HappyTrance · 23/04/2023 07:53

Yes it’s a bit early? Is he still there with you in your room?

HappyTrance · 23/04/2023 07:53

And no, I wouldn’t tell her. I don’t see that you need to.

pastaandpesto · 23/04/2023 07:54

Isn't the point here more about how her DH would feel if he finds out that his dad took advantage of his wedding day to have a quick shag? I guess it depends on the relationship between the father and son, but I surely most sons would find that pretty distasteful. If the DH is indeed upset by it, then you are complicit in a situation that has caused upset to her new husband on/about their wedding day. I think it's pretty out of order tbh and that the whole "he's single, I'm single" minimises the real issue which is how the DH will feel if he finds out.

cowsaysmoo · 23/04/2023 07:55

Don't worry, just enjoy it. You didn't betray anyone.
Love the idea of you being her MIL in law though! 😂

Conkersinautumn · 23/04/2023 07:55

At the wedding totally attention seeking behaviour from both of you (and you invited him up). I know you seem to have got away with it. But seriously, your friend would surely be mortified to find the only thing anyone recalls about her wedding was her friend getting it on with the grooms dad.

BitchFaceResting · 23/04/2023 07:56

Sorry, that's just off, especially as it's you BFs dad.
Would those of you who find this ok be saying the same thing if the BFs dad had posted 'after my son's wedding I had sex with my daughter-in-laws best friend'? I think not

Will you tell his son? And really, if you are not embarrassed or ashamed, why don't you tell your friend? It's not like it's her dad you slept with

pfftt · 23/04/2023 07:57

Conkersinautumn · 23/04/2023 07:55

At the wedding totally attention seeking behaviour from both of you (and you invited him up). I know you seem to have got away with it. But seriously, your friend would surely be mortified to find the only thing anyone recalls about her wedding was her friend getting it on with the grooms dad.

And everyone would know how exactly?

BitchFaceResting · 23/04/2023 07:57

BitchFaceResting · 23/04/2023 07:56

Sorry, that's just off, especially as it's you BFs dad.
Would those of you who find this ok be saying the same thing if the BFs dad had posted 'after my son's wedding I had sex with my daughter-in-laws best friend'? I think not

Will you tell his son? And really, if you are not embarrassed or ashamed, why don't you tell your friend? It's not like it's her dad you slept with

•sorry, bf husbands dad, not bf

Conkersinautumn · 23/04/2023 07:58

It's a hotel a lot of the guests are in.

AllIeveknewonlyou · 23/04/2023 07:58

Conkersinautumn · 23/04/2023 07:55

At the wedding totally attention seeking behaviour from both of you (and you invited him up). I know you seem to have got away with it. But seriously, your friend would surely be mortified to find the only thing anyone recalls about her wedding was her friend getting it on with the grooms dad.

They weren't putting on a floor show. They fancy each other, are consenting adults and single.

I think it's fine. One of my friend's brother's slept with her friend at her wedding. And in the corridor at that. My friend just rolled her eyes.

Devoutspoken · 23/04/2023 08:01

I think it's a bit messy and close to the bone, as it were. Is it a one off? How long has he been separated from the mil? Presume she was at wedding? Of all the people available to shag, you chose the more complicated scenario

pillowpuff · 23/04/2023 08:01

It's not like you slept with her DH, I really don't think it matters, go find him before breakfast & have another go 🤪

loislovesstewie · 23/04/2023 08:02

It's nobody else's business. You don't need to tell anyone. I don't think I ever told people who I was having sex with, if it was obvious that we were in a relationship then it was taken for granted, if it was a one off then no one needs to know.

Tarantullah · 23/04/2023 08:03

If you're super close it'll be hard to keep something from her but I absolutely would in this case. I'd also say don't tell any of your other friends either, I've been put in hard situations in the past where somethings been kept from someone (for good reason) but I'd have rather not known so I didn't feel bad about keeping it secret.

LittleDitto · 23/04/2023 08:05

Nice work op! No need to feel guilty, but I understand the awkwardness. Hope it was a good night!!

AllIeveknewonlyou · 23/04/2023 08:06

Devoutspoken · 23/04/2023 08:01

I think it's a bit messy and close to the bone, as it were. Is it a one off? How long has he been separated from the mil? Presume she was at wedding? Of all the people available to shag, you chose the more complicated scenario

Ah - I hadn't thought of mil being at wedding

Willmafrockfit · 23/04/2023 08:07

you are both sing;le
good for you
no need to broadcast
but no shame either

5128gap · 23/04/2023 08:08

I'd be very surprised if this actually is an end to it tbh. I'm sure other opportunities will present themselves or be created in future by two single people with sexual tension between them.
With that in mind and if you don't want to keep a long term secret, I'd tell her something.
Not that you had sex necessarily, but that you went back to your room (you may well have been seen. He may well be indiscrete) for drinks and got on really well, a definite spark etc. Her reaction will tell you if it's likely to be a problem for her and you can take it from there.

AllIeveknewonlyou · 23/04/2023 08:08

It's a mixed up muddled up shook up world

PhilNW · 23/04/2023 08:08

Why would you tell her? you were both consenting single adults and had a fun night.

She does not have to know everything about your life does she?

mrsbyers · 23/04/2023 08:09

I think you’ve posted this because you want / need to tell someone rather than it’s tearing you up - you’re two adults and by the sound of things were sober enough to have thought of the impact on your friend before you did it so crack on and live with it

Bumfluffs · 23/04/2023 08:10

Hope you enjoyed op.
It’s no one’s business but yours. You’re both single consenting adults and life’s too short.

Devoutspoken · 23/04/2023 08:11

Will the son think it's cool his dad is shagging women young enough to be his daughter

SorePaw · 23/04/2023 08:12

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 23/04/2023 07:45

Obviously you’ve done nothing “wrong” but I can totally see your friend not being happy. Take it to the grave

@OnlyFoolsnMothers

why?

@Pillowfork He was your friend first, you're single adults, I can't see the problem. I wouldn't 'not tell' my bf, but I wouldn't be breaking my neck TO tell her either, but that would be the same whoever it was.

Being her wedding makes no difference. Who guests go to bed is none of the B&G's business, unless maybe it's going to cause ructions.

Maireas · 23/04/2023 08:12

Next thread: she thinks she's pregnant....