Waking us everyday at 6.30 am

[Springinabundance]

We have guests staying for ten days, it’s actually my parents. They go to bed at 9pm and wake at 6.30. They’re in the spare room right next to our room.
My dad wakes and goes to one of the bathrooms very close and brushes his teeth, clears his throat etc.
Dd, 4, is completely overtired and very difficult 😩
She needs 11 hours sleep to be her normal self. I take her up to bed at 7, but with the lighter evenings, she sometimes doesn’t fall asleep until 8.30.
I’ve asked my mum if they could please try to keep quieter in the mornings as Dd needs her sleep etc. She said it’s hard to stay in bed if you’re awake and up (she’s very quiet though tbf)
I don’t know what the solution is here 🤷🏻‍♀️
Dh is exhausted too as Dd is sharing with us, so he often comes down to sleep on the sofa…my dad comes down at 6.30 to make a coffee and open the doors etc
Our usual wake up time during the week is 8ish and weekends a bit later.
Its been another 6.30 start today and already Dd is acting nuts!

All of you saying that 630am is not early, or comparing your child's wake up time to the OP's are being rather short sighted and not actually being very helpful.

Time is a relative construct, what's early for one family may be late for another.

630am is early for the OP. This needs to be accepted as a fact in this thread and not questioned.

Your Dad is being unreasonable but you need to speak to him about it.

Posters saying 6.30 is not early have missed the point of your post by a hundred miles. And maybe jealous because they don’t get a lie in because their kids are up at 6 demanding attention 😂

@Springinabundance

I thought you were going to say it was a neighbour that was waking you up everyday at 6:30 AM with their car revving up, and ticking over for 15 minutes or so, with shouting and hollering and whistling under your bedroom window or something!

It's just your parents staying for 10 days, It's a very short amount of time. And I think you need to suck it up this time. I also don't understand (as quite a few posters have said,) how you lie until 8:00 AM, when you've got a child to get to school, and a job to get to.

I've got two kids (now grown,) and I was always up between 6:45 and 7:00 AM, because there's no way in hell that I would have been able to leave the house at 8:15-8.20 AM to take them to school otherwise. You say (later in the thread,) that your DD starts at 9.15 AM. That's a late start time isn't it? And you start at 9.30 AM. Even so, 8 AM is still quite late a time to wake, if you have to leave the house at 9 AM!

Of course, your dad's being a little bit inconsiderate, but he doesn't know if you don't tell him, does he? He probably doesn't realise the noise he is making. I also think you should be telling him and not your mom (as he is making the noise,)

I'm saying YABU. Because it's not a very long amount of time, you haven't told them, (so they don't know,) and I find it really hard to understand why you have a problem being woken at 6:30 with a four year old to get to school anyway. Surely most people would get up at 7 AM anyway with school kids. 6.30AM isn't that much earlier!

I imagine your DD is excitable because of her grandparents in the house so she's not getting off to sleep at night because she thinks she's missing out . I agree with trying to get her outside as much as possible in the day time . Your dad must be being extremely noisy with making his coffee in the morning to wake a small child who is fully asleep though.
It is difficult sharing a house with others when there's a different routine in place .

My Mum used to do this when she visited when DS was little. She’d get up, have a bath etc and it always woke DS. I asked her not to, so she stopped. What grandparent wants to make life harder for their child/grandchild? Your parents are being really selfish OP.

To be fair to the poor man. He is getting up, having a wee and brushing his teeth , He's not practicing his trombone.
Older people often get a little set in their routine and he is only visiting for 10 days, letting this issue spoil the visit seems bonkers to me.

It seems that a big part of your issue is that your dd behaviour has been poor and you hate that your parents see her like this and not as the girl she normally is and I sympathise with that.

My parents rarely got up before 8:30 at the earliest after hitting retirement. Sounds like it's all down to individuals.

Then again, they wouldn't have dreamt of going to bed at the ridiculous hour of 9pm.

Like a previous poster said, it's only short term. So therefore, I am sure they can stop making noise in the morning for the short period they are with you.

Yes she is quite ridiculous tbh but if you heard it from her side, I am an ungrateful daughter who doesn’t even make her a coffee.

DH has told her in no uncertain terms she can’t stay anymore and she made comments to everyone who would listen about how she had nowhere to go etc. She would never be like this in anyone else’s house.

Someone up thread said about the GP looking after the DD if they wake her up which I think is a good compromise.

And you have two pieces of toast at exactly 8am, so anyone eating less or more than you, and not at the same time as you, must surely be unreasonable. You have no idea how on earth they cope!

Too late now but why have your parents when your dd is such a light sleeper? If my parents visit I can guarantee df would be up at the same time. Many folk cannot lie in, cleaning teeth and going to the loo is not being too rowdy really.

Just power through the next few days and have a better plan for next visit.

Can you not compromise on 7?

And tbh going out for dinner at 7 is ridiculous

Going out for a meal at 7 when she normally goes to bed at 7 is very strange.
6:30 isn’t early def sounds like u r being unreasonable.

WTF are you going on about?

This!
OP's dad needs to be a tad more considerate, and consider a compromise, even half an hour later would help.
Ypu need to have a full and frank discussion with your parents op.

Exactly go to one of those family friendly harvester type places and have teatime meal 5 or 6pm at the latest.

@RampantIvy · Today 09:44

It’s a weird MN thing that if you don’t get up at the crack of dawn you’re supremely lazy.

No-one is saying that. It's just impossible to fathom how anyone can lie in til 8AM when they have school age children, AND a job. No-one with school age kids gets up at 8AM. And certainly not if they have a bloody job starting at 9AM like many jobs do.

This. Definitely. Your dad is pulling the alpha older male card. It is so depressing.

You can ask them to relocate to a hotel if it’s easier. Maybe give him one more chance tonight. A trial of 8am. Alternatively, what about if he / they have the downstairs? You may need to think about a mattress in that case. But if he cannot stay in bed and needs a wee, he can be downstairs if there’s a downstairs loo. Ditto teeth cleaning. Literally show him how the doors shut quietly. Then no opening external doors until 8am. Compromise dad. Compromise.

If your parents go to bed at 9pm every night, do they want to be going out to dinner at 7?!

@PrettyMaybug

I’ll say it slowly so you can absorb it.

Everyone is different

Time and is relative depending on who it is.

Just because you think a time is not early is irrelevant to anyone else.

Why do you and several others have a massive gap in comprehension here?

It doesn’t sound like they are being overly noisy though. Just normal behaviour. But you want them to stay in bed and not make a sound for 2 hours. That’s bonkers.

'630am is early for the OP. This needs to be accepted as a fact in this thread and not questioned.'

They're her parents you'd think she'd have some idea that they are early risers. They seen to have a small house as dd is in with them, it's all a bit predictable and preventable. Sadly, no help now but things like going out to eat at 7pm when that is the dc's bedtime seem a bit daft.

This. Now I am a bit older I have come to understand things are not like your 20s and 30s - he might be uncomfortable and it’s hardly 4.30am!

Your daughter needs black out blinds if she call fall asleep for over an hour.

10 days is too long for a visit

Has your mind just been blown by someone doing things a bit differently, can you cope?