Friend told daughter to 'fuck off and die'

[leepingup]

My daughter and her friend are both 10, unbeknownst to me yesterday whilst I was in the shower, they pranked called a few of my friends. I found out because one of my friends text me to tell me. I said no more and that was that.

This morning daughter says to me, 'when we prank called your friend, 'Pete' he told us to 'fuck off and die' three times.'

I wasn't really sure how to handle the situation as they obviously shouldn't have been prank calling but also I think it's pretty obvious they are children.

So I text Pete and the messages went like this -

Me - Hey did you say to Amelia to go fuck herself and die yesterday, she said her and her friend prank called you yesterday, I didn’t know. Did you not realise it was her I presume? Xx

Pete - I didn't until she said her name!!! My intuition was right!!!

I don't really know what he means but I feel really uncomfortable about this.

Am I being dramatic? Should I leave it at that? Is it their own fault for prank calling?

@ASimpleLampoon You would find it hilarious for kids to phone you anonymously a number of times and disturb you? Maybe wake you up?

Your child behaved like a total dick, own it instead of arguing with posters. Btw my DD is also 10.

Team Pete all the way. One prank call I might laugh off, THREE is bullying or harassment. Your daughter knew what she was doing and was being unkind at the expense of another.
I hope you got Pete an apology note from your daughter.

Who said it was a number of times? She called him once.

You said she was told to fuck off and die three times? Three times in ONE conversation?

Prank calls are annoying. I’d probably say similar to be honest. Wouldn’t mean I want the kid to actually die, more just go away and leave me alone. If they were bothered by the response then good, hopefully they’ll learn a lesson. My brother once told someone who prank called him to “eat a dick” so he could have said worse!

It's harsh, but I don't feel sorry for your dd. She did a stupid thing and got a stupid answer. What if it wasn't your friend and a stranger, she would still hear the same words. Lesson for her, stop playing stupid games because you don't know what to expect. Bet she won't do that again!

Yes 3 times in one conversation.

@leepingup if it was so upsetting and traumatic why didn't they hang up after the first time?

I wouldn't tell someone to die....ever. I've also never said (or felt) I hate anyone.
However, I wouldn't necessarily filter my response because I was talking to a child. Sounds like he told them to fuck off then she said it's Amelia, and he said AH I thought as much. Whether he did or didn't know/suspect it was her as a parent or call 'victim' I'd be content with that response. I hope it shocked and scared her a bit. Forget speaking withbyour friend, speak with your daughter.

But did he tell her to fuck off and die, three times in a row AFTER he figured out who it was?

Did he say it aggressively and nastily or is it a more casual thing he is likely to come out with as he's a sweary sort of person.

Bottom line is - if your kid prank calls people to be a dick there is a good chance those people will be dicks back. It's your job to parent your child!

I find a lot of what kids do hilarious even if it's naughty. Doesn't mean I don't correct the behaviour or have a word with the parents. Nothing wrong with sorting it out but having a laugh about it later.

I find a sense of humour is an advantage when dealing with kids but you do you.

Exactly!

being ‘silly and innocent’ doesn’t excuse you from earning lessons about how your actions affect other people

It would change how I see him, for sure.

But I'd still go right through my kids for prank calling!

At any point did I say it was so upsetting and traumatic? In fact, I wrote on the thread that my daughter wasn't overly bothered about his reaction.

I’ll keep it simple:

Dont do things to piss people off, and you won’t get a nasty reaction.

Behave like a dick to people, expect them to be a dick back.

So why the frikking angst then? Not just from you but you also got a few posters in such a tizzy I bet they'll have nightmares tonight of big scary Pete.

Your kid needs to learn some manners

your kid needs to understand the consequences.

@ASimpleLampoon Ah I see! The parent who finds kids bad behaviour hilarious.

I got some prank calls a few years ago, they were from a friend of my son's (early teen), kept phoning at all sorts of times -sometimes very late at night. It so happened that my father was very ill at the time, so unexpected phone calls at odd times were really stressful for me.
Anyway, I found out who was doing it, phoned his Mum and told her. She was mortified, she brought him round to my house got him to apologise, and I chatted to him about why it can be upsetting for people to be prank called. He was a nice lad, just did something silly. But his Mum behaved, as I would expect a good parent to behave and he learnt from both of us that prank calls are not a good thing to do.
You seem to be fixating on your friends reaction rather than using it as a learning experience for your DD and getting her to understand that sometimes something that seems a bit of naughty fun to children, can be nastier and more upsetting for the recipient than they may understand unless they are taught to think beyond their immediate impulsive actions. She's old enough to understand that prank calls aren't nice and can be hurtful, because other people have things going on in their lives which she doesn't know about. Pete's reaction showed that people don't find them funny and will react accordingly.

They are very bold little madams arent they? I would never have dreamed of doing so disrespectful at that age, and neither would my kids.Kids prank other kids not adults

I think you need to focus on your own kids disrespectfulness, before you worry about how their prank victims have responded!

like y'all are making out

Oh dear. Channelling Shania doesn't make this any less of a cringe fest,

Prank calls are annoying but if they only prank called Pete once and he reacted THAT extremely to one prank call where he's admitted his intuition told him it was your DD... yeah, I think he was out of order.

Had it been a number of calls and heavy breathing or name calling, his reaction wouldn't be so unwarranted.

Definitely a lesson here for your daughter not to make prank calls in future and maybe find other ways to amuse herself, but I do think Pete could have handled it better in this instance. I would have just hung up or played along.

She's not annoyed because she knew the consequences of pranking someone and annoying them and probably found it funny she got a reaction.
So it's just you that's getting annoyed even though he didn't know it was your daughter when he said it? Bit of an ott reaction from you just like he was a bit ott.
Either way it doesn't matter what he said, if she hadn't been pranking him she wouldn't have got that reaction so best just to forget it and move on