To think being a housewife might be nice ?

[Felixss]

I'm on leave I've managed to get the housework done the deep cleaning , decluttered, sorted my clothes and 3 tip runs. I've washed the covers on the sofa and got through a mountain of laundry. Food shop delivered, put away and ordered DDs new shoes. I'm going to sand down and paint DDs chest of drawers. To top it off I've cooked a lovely healthy meal for the family.
I feel really pleased I've managed to do all the jobs I've been meaning to do. I'm always snowed under stressed from work and end up not doing it all. I do have a cleaner but they don't do the nitty gritty really.

AIBU to think being a house wife actually might be nice ? Less pressure and you can complete all the home stuff at your leisure. 🤣 I wouldn't do this as I've worked so hard to get where I am but I can see why it might be tempting.

If some people feel it wouldn't be fair to their husband no to work, well fine. But don't apply that to everyone. Men are all different. Find one that suits you and get on with it.

I would not have children with a man who wanted separate money and this type of thing. Doesn't matter who earns what. Absolutely no way in hell could I respect a man and / or a father like that and I would rather be single. But many women apparently seem delighted with this. So crack on. Each to their own.

I don't see any difference.

It wouldn't be fair for him to fund me, 3 months old or 13 years old or 30 years old. Age of DC is irrelevant to me.

Talking about your husband 'funding' you is very depressing.

No it's not. Clearly when your child is an adult you don't need to organise childcare and your domestic chores workload is much much lower.

@Growlybear83

@echoo

No one is forcing you to engage in the discussion.

And at three months old, most women are on maternity leave so I think it's very very fair for their husbands to fund them

Why? That's exactly what it is.

@SouthLondonMum22 if you think men financially supporting their wives on maternity leave is wrong then I'd say you're the one doing sexism no favours

That's when I went back to work. We both decided to have a baby so contributed equally to my savings on maternity leave like we do with other shared bills in our joint account such as nursery fees, mortgage, grocery shopping etc.

Other than that we have separate accounts and our own money.

The fact some women use the word 'funding' speaks volumes about the dynamic in their marriages - ie. they know the DH would be resentful about 'funding' their wife and children and they know, deep down, they could not rely on him in that way. Quite often these are the 'separate finances' type if guys - how very enlightened and pro-feminist they are. Not.

There are actually men who don't see things like that, believe it or not.

So if you're both entirely 50/50, what would happen if something unexpected happen? I hope it doesn't happen obviously but what if you became ill or disabled and couldn't work? Would your dh resent you if you couldn't contribute exactly equally?

And did you want a longer mat leave or were you happy to go back at three months?

Of course not because that isn't a choice. I'd also feel the same if he couldn't work any longer due to health issues.

I would feel resentful if he didn't want to work because he just fancied reading, exercising and napping instead.

Anyway, over 1000 votes and 76% have apparently voted that 'being a housewife might be nice.'

Read into that what you will. Or you can just tell yourself they are all silly women who can't possibly know their own minds and really, all they need is a great revelation on MN that it's "SEXIST!!!"

I was happy to go back at 3 months.

What if he didn't want to work because he wanted to look after your ds and the home?

I'd resent that. I expect both of us to contribute financially.

And if you had wanted a longer maternity leave, would he have supported that idea? If he had to fund it? Or could you only have taken longer if you paid your share?

I understand as kids get older but when you've just had a baby, I think having to continue to provide an exact 50% contribution is really sad.

I love it and have stayed at home ever since I married. I don't know how you can manage to have a family and go out to work - we have 4 children and I consider it's a full time job.
It also means I've time for the children when they come home from school and a dinner that we all sit up together in the evening - it's very satisfying. I understand it's not for everyone, but I wouldn't change it.
Yes some things are repetitive - but they are if you go to work, there's always something that you have to do that you don't like doing - that's life!!
It also means that I've time in the evening for my husband, he's worked all day and needs to relax - yes, it's old fashioned but so what!! it means we're not stressed, we've time to talk together and weekends are fun, not over-run with tasks that need doing.
I guess it's the way we were brought up so for me it's a normal way of life.
I do understand not everyone can afford it - but if you can, I'd recommend it.

I didn't have to, I wanted to and wouldn't have had it any other way.

Having my own money is incredibly important to me and that didn't change just because I had a baby.

@echoo

The hypocrisy is strong huh

What happened to no judgement and each to their own?

@Comedycook

What does your oh do?

Just in case any women missed it, wanting to be home with your own children is 'SEXIST!!!!' Expect to be (gasp) JUDGED on AIBU. Oh, and did you know, it's SEXIST!!!' because it's er, 'SEXIST!!!' innit?

What's the relevance?