To think some people don't realise

[CybermanAshad]

A few years ago we were a surviving on 30k as a household. It was tight but fine. That was one wage. I was a SAHP as it was cheaper than nursery fees.

We're a family of three with two cats. That's 2 adults and a 4 year old.

Now we have an income of just over 40k and things are harder than ever and we've never struggled so much. That's one wage, child benefit and a student maintenance loan.

We have £5 in the bank to last until 25th of the month. Some food but not much. Both cars need fuel. Before if things were tight there was always some way to get by. Small savings pot (under 1k) we also overpay into our bills account every month not much but would mean if things got tight there might be a spare £100 in there we could use.

Now we have no savings, no spare in the bills account. A combined over draft of £2000 now maxed.

Never thought I'd be wishing DC was back at school to benefit from the school dinner every day.

Desperately trying to get a job. Looking for something that pays about 20k. Would replace maintenance loan and give us 11k extra a year. So far all rejections.

Partner has also managed to get a job paying 8k more a year but doesn't start until May so won't see the benefit until the end of May.

Just feels relentless at the moment.

Saw a thread on here recently with lots of posters saying 85k was nothing in London and people on benefits had a ton of money and had no idea what it was like trying to survive on 85k with no help. I know it's bloody expensive in London but from my own perspective, 85k would be a dream. We don't qualify for benefits beside child benefit which is £87.20 every four weeks.

As I said, a few years ago we got by on 30k and now we're struggling on 40k.

AIBU to think some people don't understand that there's a huge middle section of people who don't recieve benefits but earn under 50k?

I imagine struggling a lot more than those on 85k.

There was a thread yesterday with multiple posters saying £130k is not much to live on!

Some people do not understand the difference between essential and non-essential bills.

The majority of MNers are extremely high earners / married to high earners compared to the rest of the country and so you often get biased views on here.

A 40k household income is low though isn't it?

It's two adults working minimum wage or one adult in a mid-range job.

40k with one earner comes out at about 2.8k after tax doesn't it? That is bugger-all really once mortgage/rent, utilities, food, transport, clothes, life etc etc.

Don't you think most of us would rather have a mortgage than be paying off someone else's by paying the extortionate private rental prices? Unfortunately for a lot of us it's never been within reach. Of course UC shouldn't be given to help pay your mortgage. If it bothers you people that much sell up and rent....no didn't think so 🤔

Similar here.

we earn a reasonably good combined wage. A couple of years ago, we used to have around £500-£600 surplus each month. We could afford to eat out regularly, buy clothes whenever we wanted, have days out etc.

we are now going down to £0 before the end of each month and have cut out all of the treats and unnecessary spending. My son needs school trousers and I’ve had to sell a load of stuff on Vinted because I know that purchasing them would push me into my overdraft.

we are also having to look at downsizing.

I am aware that we are in a much more fortunate position than most but it’s quite shocking really.

Do you know ALL of your outgoings ?
Are you sure you really need them ?
Can the essentials be done cheaper ?
Can the luxury items/hobbies be done cheaper or changed ?
Do you have a budget and how well do you stick to it ?

At the risk of sounding part of the four yorkshiremen sketch, our family of four (no pets), two of which are senior school age manage just fine on a budget of £20,304 per year budget (this includes special saving pots for redecoration, boiler replacement, future furniture e.t.c.) -- however, mortgage is paid off, so make that perhaps £30,000 for comparison purposes .

Back to the OP, if things were that dire you would be getting rid of a car, in fact you probably should have done that before burning through your savings and overdraft. Everything is more expensive and probably only going to get worse. Buses are currently pretty good value with the £2 price cap in force in a lot of areas

Would you consider cleaning work or care work/night time nursing home care assistant or baby sitting. I don't mean to demean, it's just there might be options that pay better than you realise. Lidl is apparently a very good company to work for, good benefits.

I have to agree with this.

Are your outgoings the cheapest they could possibly be? I spend a bit of time each year doing the comparison sites/talking to utilities to ensure I have the lowest price. I don't buy new, ever. Everything is from fb marketplace or vinted. I'm very savvy on food prices, although this is more difficult now with price increases! Could you get an evening job a few times a week or one weekend day, at least until your dc start school? So many options when you have a dp to earn a bit more around their main job! It's not forever remember, just whilst your dc is really young and you need more income.

I agree with this. I feel it is often short sighted.

We pay £100+ a day in nursery fees. It's expensive but temporary.

By your admission you're getting further and further into debt, so you're NOT managing! Yes I believe people earn the amounts they say they're earning on here, but I don't believe they're doing more than surviving

But two people earning £80k between them are sharing housing costs and bills, so it's not just the take home pay you need to think about.

I think you are the one being unreasonable. 40k for a family of 3 is equivalent to two adults earning minimum wage, it's not extravagant and it's easy to see how someone would struggle on that. They might be able to get by but it wouldn't be easy, especially with costs rising as they have been.

You say that you cope on 22k for a family of 3, and a £700pcm mortgage - how? Once you've paid council tax, bills, food, petrol, that money is wiped out. I can't imagine how you could save for anything or have any spending money, that is a paycheck-to-paycheck level of income - yet you feel that you can sneer at other people because they have a bit more and say 'boo hoo', like it's a poverty competition? Ridiculous.

I am also south east. Not sure I believe you are applying and being rejected for jobs you are over qualified for.
my company is crying out for carers, support workers & admin staff. As long as you show willingness and have the right attitude to learning, you’ll be in. All starting around 21k.

I don’t think people realise how much others pay in contributions/ deductions. Our household income before tax NI pension payments student loan is 80k, reality is we are worried about how to pay nursery fees and put food on the table each month.

This person is the mythical "retired nurse" that claims young people today don't know they're born.

Meant to quote @PurpleSky300 there

British people seem to have this weird competitive poverty thing, it's bizarre.

Absolutely.

South East is a big place. There aren't many jobs in my area. Lots of applicants.

Yes to this, especially if you only have 1 child. If you put the child in nursery after maternity leave is over and also take into account the free hours when they turn 3, the actual time isn't that much. But for your career you're talking no gaps, continuous training/upskilling, possibly pay grades going up and better promotion opportunities.

I agree. When people say they’ve given up work because it barely makes sense I think it’s shortsighted. At one point we were paying £700 per month and me going back to work had added £1100. That £400 extra added to our pot didn’t seem a lot for all of the upheaval and hard work of going back to work with 2 very young children. Worth it now they’re school age

I think in our case it's because I was in a poorly paid job with zero progression opportunities. Which is why we decided I should go to university to study whilst I was at home looking after DC so that when I did return to the workplace I'd have hopefully a better wage, opportunities, progression etc. And at the time this was affordable for us to do. Not so much now!

And sadly it's always the woman who takes the hit whilst the men are unaffected.

It will happen, especially if you have worked for a degree. It just might take time to get the right job but don't give up!

Oh, I see - I'm not familiar with those posts.

I did wonder how someone who says they were paying £500pcm mortgage back in the 1990s comes to be paying even more 30 years later. Most people would either have paid off the mortgage by now (freeing up more ££££) or added more debt by 'climbing the ladder' to bigger houses - not easy to do on 22k.