Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To expect her to pay for all of it?

336 replies

sunmonlight · 09/04/2023 12:12

My home has two bedrooms.

On Thursday I went on a night out with friends and didn't drink. I went home early.

My friend couldn't get a taxi back from the town and was very drunk, she called me and I got out of bed to pick her up at 3am and brought her back to mine as she lives 8 miles away.

She slept in my son's bed as he wasn't here.

I went in yesterday to change the bedding to see she had been sick all over the mattress, wall, duvet and pillows. All the bedding will need to be replaced.

She says she doesn't remember being sick.

She has offered to pay half for new bedding. Is this reasonable?

OP posts:
GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 09/04/2023 16:48

How disgusting. Adults who get so pissed that they can’t even make it to a loo to throw up in, are an utter disgrace.

Yerroblemom1923 · 09/04/2023 16:50

The bedding can be soaked and washed but I'd want to replace the duvet and pillows if unwashable.
I would've been mortified and insist on washing it myself, cleaning up any mess and giving you money to pay for anything that needed replacing! I don't understand people like your "friend". CF of the highest order. It was bad enough dragging you out of bed at 3am!

Whowhatwherewhenwhy1 · 09/04/2023 16:55

Sorry but some of the responses on here as usual beggar belief. Sick that has soaked right through and laid there further purifying for another two days will not shift as easily as if it is immediately bunged in the wash. Its one thing sleeping in laundered bedding that you or your own kids have puked on but no way would i want to sleep in it after someone else has done it. And as for leaving without mentioning the state she had left the bedding in - that stinks of guilt and embarrassment and is so sneaky. I would absolutely call her out and ask her to come back and take charge of the clear up. If she truly thought the dog had done it she would have mentioned that at the time and as for saying she didn't know, how can she think its dog vomit if she didn't know there was vomit there? Bollocks to that. She pays all and the friendship is over either way as she sounds like a user anyway

WonderingWanda · 09/04/2023 16:58

I think she should be cleaning it all in her washing machine and then replacing anything which can't be got clean.

honeylulu · 09/04/2023 17:00

The sheets, duvet cover and pillow cases can be washed but the actual duvet and pillows may not be possible to clean effectively. Worse (because it's the most expensive thing) if its soaked into the mattress it may be beyond saving. If it's just reached the surface then a good scrubbing might save it (though the filthy minx ought to be doing that, not you) but if it's soaked right into the foam it will stink forever and it has to go. Anything that does need replacing she needs to pay for in full. She even puked up the wall!! It's she not ashamed of herself? What a filthbag!

honeylulu · 09/04/2023 17:04

Oh and to people saying the duvet can be washed, I wouldn't be confident about that after 2 days. My son puked on a duvet when we were camping (not alcohol related). No access to washing machine for 2 days and when we did, let's just say it was evidently beyond "saving".

GreyfriarsBobbie · 09/04/2023 17:11

Tell her it’s def not the dog cos he always eats his puke

(or is that just mine?)

DoubleTime · 09/04/2023 17:45

If I had got into that state at a friends after they had been good enough to collect me at 3am and let me stay over, then I would have stripped the bed put the offending articles in the bin, apologised profusely, and gone out and bought new bedding (and something for my friend as a thankyou/ apology) .

AxolotlOnions · 09/04/2023 17:47

If she thought it was the dog, she was aware of it before she left and didn't say anything so it would still be her fault.

IDontWantToBeAPie · 09/04/2023 23:01

'It doesn't matter that you don't remember the fact is that I woke up and got you at 3am and you went on to ruin my child's bedding and mattress. I expect you to replace them on full.'

Proudofitbabe · 09/04/2023 23:23

WHAT! Er no. She obviously needs to send you whatever money it costs to replace whatever needs replacing. I would send her a message "cost of the new stuff is X, here are my bank details".

I would then fuck her off regardless for the absolute neck of sneakily leaving your home in puke after you'd got out of bed at 3AM to save her from whatever can happen to a lone drunk woman on a night out. Just a disgrace.

Codlingmoths · 09/04/2023 23:37

If she thinks the things can be washed she can come straight over and collect them to wash!

5foot5 · 10/04/2023 00:01

sunmonlight · 09/04/2023 12:14

I'm not good with these things and I don't want to fall out with her. I don't know what to say/do.

Why don't you want to fall out with her?

She is a foul excuse for a human being who has taken you completely for granted and treated you and your home in the most disrespectful way imaginable.

Why on earth would you want to maintain any kind of friendship with this awful person?

Murdoch1949 · 10/04/2023 07:20

She should pay for all the bedding to be replaced. You did her a huge favour!

KarmaStar · 10/04/2023 10:37

Yanbu and pp agreeing it was the dog are just ridiculous.
She was highly intoxicated,threw up in the bed,too hungover to deal with the mess and apologising at the time so just left it.
and is now telling mutual friends you are lying ?
and only offering half?
She's vile.get rid of her from your life.but get full costs first.
make sure your other friends know the truth.

TheCentreSlide · 10/04/2023 10:39

She needs to pay all of it. Unbelievable that she only offered half.

masterblaster · 10/04/2023 18:03

It’s a bit of sick, it isn’t sarin. I’d wash it and have a few words for my friend, but if they are a genuine friend, sometimes things happen.

TwoThousandZeroZeroPartyOverOopsFoundMoreTime · 10/04/2023 18:06

Yanbu
She is disgusting 🤢

She should be very apologetic and pay for anything that's ruined including duvet pillow and new bedding - the whole amount

You might even have to scrub his mattress
If she ruined that I'd charge her that as well

Yo try to blame it in the dog is below shut, of. She knew when she got up and she LEFT it like that for you to find??

Ans after your driven to town to pick her up

Your poor DS has no bed to sleep in bc she's minging disgusting person

I would be taking photos and sending her the bill as well as telling her it was you as what you ate that night is viable in it

oosha · 10/04/2023 18:06

She needs to come and clean it up and pay the full price for anything that needs replacing. There is no way she got out of that bed without realizing there was vomit everywhere; furthermore she said nothing…….she knows she did it the dirty cow

TwoThousandZeroZeroPartyOverOopsFoundMoreTime · 10/04/2023 18:07

KarmaStar · 10/04/2023 10:37

Yanbu and pp agreeing it was the dog are just ridiculous.
She was highly intoxicated,threw up in the bed,too hungover to deal with the mess and apologising at the time so just left it.
and is now telling mutual friends you are lying ?
and only offering half?
She's vile.get rid of her from your life.but get full costs first.
make sure your other friends know the truth.

This ^

A friend doesn't do this to a friend that did them a. Huge favour

She should be apologising not trying to manipulate you or only pay half?? You would t need to replace it if she had t ruined it

Missingpop · 10/04/2023 18:12

No it’s fucking disgusting she pays for everything she knew she’d done it when she woke up but happily left your home & left it for you to find disgusting behaviour

Hankunamatata · 10/04/2023 18:17

Omg how on earth could she have covered it like that and not said anything.

Craftybodger · 10/04/2023 18:18

I would expect her to pay for full replacement costs of bed line , bedding and the mattress.

Hankunamatata · 10/04/2023 18:18

I wouldn't be surprised if mattress was ruined after 2 days.
How could she not know. She obviously put duvet over it.

Hayliebells · 10/04/2023 18:34

You don't need a friend who calls at 3am for a lift, then pukes in your child's bed. I'd extract the full cost of bedding etc, then block her.