to wear my asexual ring

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asexuals often wear a black ring on the middle finger of the right hand edited by MNHQ

I think it would be very useful if this was widely recognised and understood,

Then asexuals could go to pubs, clubs, social events and no one would be hitting on them, friendships started at work or hobbies would not be prone to misunderstandings, and accusations of leading people on, and social arrangements could be made without the confusion about whether it is meant to be a date of not.

asexuals would also recognise each other

I think it is similar to earing a wedding ring to say you are in a relationship, wearing an asexual ring to signal that you are not available for a sexual relationship, even though you may be known to be single

I am expecting a load of hostility and aggression on here, because there always is, whenever asexuality is mentioned, but that wont bother me at all, because some people will read this, and learn to recognise the asexual ring, and that is all I want.

Then asexuals could go to pubs, clubs, social events and no one would be hitting on them, friendships started at work or hobbies would not be prone to misunderstandings, and accusations of leading people on, and social arrangements could be made without the confusion about whether it is meant to be a date of not.

But most women would like to go out and not be hit on. We'd like to be able to have conversations with men at work and in hobbies without them thinking that our talking to them indicates that we want their dick in us.

You seem to have a very skewed idea about what it is like not to be asexual.

I am expecting a load of hostility and aggression on here, because there always is, whenever asexuality is mentioned.

People thinking something is stupid is not aggression.

You are literally posting on a board called 'Am I being unreasonable?', it's ridiculous to complain that some people don't like your view.

Wear it if you like - the more people who wear it and explain why the more it will be recognised.

BUT - if it’s recognised it’s like wearing a badge which screams ‘I’m asexual’ and may invite questions about that at work, while out etc etc. If you don’t mind that then fine but if you do then why not just wear a ring on your wedding finger? It has the same ‘I’m not available to be chatted up’ effect without giving out your personal information.

I'm not sure anyone wants to be harassed do they? Do you believe that you are more harassed than others? A wedding ring doesn't stop it so I doubt any other type of jewellery will either. Of course wear it if it makes you feel more comfortable though, that goes without saying.

Why do you have to tell them you're asexual? No I'm not interested should suffice.

As you've read, wedding rings won't stopped a pissed bloke in a bar so any other signal won't. You need to say no. Men need to respect that women saying no means no.

We don't need rings, flags, pictures, diagrams or secret handshakes for this to work.

Same.

No one really cares how you do or don't get your rocks off.

I dont have to signal to people who aren't even talking to me what I like to do / not do in the bedroom, why do you feel the need to let everyone know?

Simple, "not interested" will do

Oh this is interesting. I’ve never noticed the black ring before, but good to know the meaning behind it.

I don't hit on anyone, nor do I notice what rings people are wearing so the whole thing is wasted on me but wear whatever jewellery you like.

Why would you need to tell them you’re asexual? That’s bonkers. Men and women will try and make a move if they fancy someone, just say no thanks and move on. Don’t invite them into your private life ffs 🤦🏽‍♀️

Are non Asexual people called sexual people?

Just a thought, you don't need to 'explain' yourself or tell people you are asexual when rejecting their advances. You're giving them information to argue with. Just say no, I'm not interested, and leave them.

Wear it if you want but it doesn't signify asexuality in every culture. I know in Poland for example, they wear their wedding on the third finger on the right hand, not the left. It could mean other things in other cultures as well.

What ring can I get that will actually start men hitting on me??

Wear whatever jewellery you like but don’t expect anyone to take any notice, I’ve been married for 10 years, I never wear my wedding ring, I occasionally wear my engagement ring if I’m going out, but in the same way I’d wear a necklace or earrings.

I wouldn’t expect anyone to know/assume anything based on what jewellery I choose to wear, if someone approached me in a romantic type way I’d simply say I was in a relationship.

Friendships never get weird because I’m a normal human

I knew that eventually one of you lot would find their way onto MN. I bet you answer your door without prior appointment and everything.

By the sounds of it putting on a fake wedding ring will get some blokes to hit on you

But in all seriousness a smile is better than any make up, clothes or jewellery.

😂😂

😂😂😂

Married people often wear a ring, and that shows they are in a committed relationship already, and not available for a relationship, so they dont have to keep referring to being married, in order to make sure that noone is seeing them as a potential partner, or invitations out are not being seen as "dates" by the other person

I am not (currently) married but when I was, and very obviously pregnant, I got several propositions by men when I was working behind a bar.

I have been out for evenings with male friends whilst single and I have never EVER had them come on to me because it is stipulated/implied/discussed beforehand that I am not interested. We have still had good night's out. Similarly if I was invited out by someone who did show 'interest' and I wasn't OK with that, then it's OK to decline, or cut short the evening. It really is OK to have boundaries and share them so there can be no confusion about what you do/don't want.

If there was any ambiguity in accepting an invite that it could be leading to something else then I think that is on you op - it's not about wearing a special (to you, I've never heard of it) ring to signify that there will be no relationship/sex in the future. I think you're massively over thinking and not using your words. 'I'm asexual.' There, that's easy. If folk are still interested in spending time with you on that basis, great, if not then you've swerved a bullet. It's really that simple.

You could if you wanted?

But no one wants to be aggressively hit on, and if it’s not aggressive then you can just say ‘I’m not up for anything intimate, just to be clear’

I wear a wedding ring. Hasn’t stopped me being hit on in the slightest 🤣 However when I’m out with my baby…… crickets 🦗

The boy way I’d notice anyones asexual ring is if they wore it through their nose.

I’ve no interest at all in what people wear on their fingers.

Oh god, another one who thinks people are interested in who you do or don't sleep with.

I don't wear a wedding ring although I'm happily married. Are men going to pounce on me?