to wear my asexual ring

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asexuals often wear a black ring on the middle finger of the right hand edited by MNHQ

I think it would be very useful if this was widely recognised and understood,

Then asexuals could go to pubs, clubs, social events and no one would be hitting on them, friendships started at work or hobbies would not be prone to misunderstandings, and accusations of leading people on, and social arrangements could be made without the confusion about whether it is meant to be a date of not.

asexuals would also recognise each other

I think it is similar to earing a wedding ring to say you are in a relationship, wearing an asexual ring to signal that you are not available for a sexual relationship, even though you may be known to be single

I am expecting a load of hostility and aggression on here, because there always is, whenever asexuality is mentioned, but that wont bother me at all, because some people will read this, and learn to recognise the asexual ring, and that is all I want.

It's a personality type not a sexuality.

Defining yourself around whether you get hit on or not is a bit sad tbh

A wedding ring won't stop them. Not do you have to explain your sexuality, or lack of it, to anyone.

'I'm not interested, thank you' brooks no room for negotiation, although it's quite alarming how often a woman says 'no' and a man says something else entirely. There needs to be more of an education campaign that 'no' means precisely that.

I've known some predatory lesbians be pretty persistent as well (I am bi). The difference here is that not once has a woman tried to grope me, sexually assault me, or force any form of unwanted physical contact on me. And a determined predator who is female would have far less chance of physically overpowering me, even if she wanted to.

We are long overdue an education campaign on respecting women's boundaries, and on imposing far harsher penalties on those who do not. Instead, we are having these boundaries stampeded over more relentlessly than I've ever witnessed in my lifetime.

Just ask any lesbian who's experienced that kind of coercive rhetoric of late, who can't even attend meetings without aggressive protestors outside, or are being removed from dating sites for daring to assert their homosexual orientation. As if that isn't the very definition of homophobia.

And yes, it's the word 'lesbian' that's a magnet for those types. I suspect 'asexual' might operate in a similar manner. Sounds very backward thinking, but some people - men mostly - are only interested when they think you're not.

I am married and don't wear a ring. Not noticed a stampede of men rushing to proposition me, and even fewer now I am 50. Admittedly I am no oil painting.

People dont believe you when you say you are asexaul, and if quite often descends into a waste of time discussion, argument, offering to "cure" you, taking it as personal rejection, etc etc etc
So why would your magic ring stop all that? Assuming so many people are actually that invested in "curing" you?
You seem to attract an awful lot of attention for a lady in her sixties, if I might say so.

Wedding rings are pretty meaningless. Mine doesn’t look like a wedding ring. My DF wears his but has been a widower for 15 years so ‘free’.
Some people don’t wear them even if married. Or wear ones belonging to relatives for sentimental reasons. And lots and lots of people do t really care if you’re married or not anyway.
So it’s no more or less useful than an ‘asexual ring’.

Indeed. I was generally hit upon in my teens, 20's and and a push, 30's. I can't imagine a queue in later years that would require the magic of a special ring to keep them at bay.

I am married and don't wear a ring. Without boasting, I was bloody fantastic looking when I was younger but a simple "not interested" was fine.

I'm 63 now and generally still not bad looking. No stampedes here either.

Surely just "not interested" works better

There's no room for argument, there's no confusion about a random piece of jewellery

Seem to care enough to make rude, sorry - ’blunt’ comments.

You know well enough that’s not true.
C’mon now!

I'm interested in people as people. Not in a long list of descriptors and flags and icons.

If this was true, you’d also be interested to hear what life is like to an asexual.

Explain why it isn't true? Why is op incapable of doing what anyone else would do and say "I'm not interested"?

This.

I am happily single and celibate and don't feel the need to announce my sexuality or sexual preferences. Where's my ring?

Mmmmmm Ive just turned 60, nobody battering down my door.................... I don't believe that happens to many over 60s women. (Actually I dont believe it happens to any!)

There is a difference between being sufficiently interested in the thread to answer the OP’s question, and being interested in the OPs identity.

A very fundamental difference! Honestly, @YouAreNotBatman, when you're in a hole, stop digging.

Hello! Just wanted to share my experiences as a 33 year old asexual. I promise you it is a thing. I in no way shout on the rooftops about it in real life, only a few close friends and my mum. Reason being that I don’t think it is something that I would need to shout about. But for the people who know me best I think it’s worthwhile to explain why I’ve never had a relationship. Because it is odd, and without the label oh asexual I would think there was something wrong with me, it was a relief to learn about it, it wasn’t to be special or different, it was to feel normal. It has a name. I don’t wear jewellery and don’t get hit on anyway so I wouldn’t wear a ring, but I do feel happy to hear other asexuals speaking out, purely because it means I’m not alone, and I want others who may be struggling with their sexuality to know they are not alone. Wear the ring with pride op. Some people will never understand and that’s ok.

But this all sounds perfectly reasonable. Of course you want the people you love to know something key about you. But you don’t owe personal details to a random in a bar.

As an asexual type, I have spent my life avoiding the kind of meat markets, circus of ...etc. that thrive on the sexual hustle. You can too! Gigs, theatre, whatever, with friends or alone, there's no need for a special ring. Body language, boundaries, and words plus walking away when confronted by persistent thick-skinned types. Generally, it's very much location; creeps respect no-one & nothing. Especially not coded accessories.

When I was single, I was able to say 'No thanks'

When I got married and wore my ring, I was able to say 'No thanks'

Still married and rarely wear the ring - I can still say 'No thanks'

None of these situations has ever required me to discuss my sexuality with a stranger.

I would have never know about the ring without reading this thread. I suspect others wouldn't know either and just think it was jewelry
I'm rather adept at throwing the bucket of cold water on men who try to chat me up so no ring needed.

This. Sounds very strange to me, it was never my experience to be hit on by randoms all the time (or ever). Why does anyone need to proclaim they’re asexual? What’s so hard about simply not showing any interest?

Hear, hear!

What are you on about?