Lodger told me I eat too much. Do I??

[Orcubed]

Obviously you’re not going to be able to tell me for sure without seeing my portions etc but I’m a bit annoyed.

She’s been wfh this week, normally we don’t really see each other. I’ve just been into the kitchen to get a coffee and opened the cupboard to get a snack to go with it (a dark chocolate rice cake if that’s relevant) and she said “you eat too much. Always eating eating eating. You will get fat when you eating like this all the time”

So Monday I had
2 cups of tea
porridge with mixed seeds
a peanut cereal bar &coffee
cheese and cucumber sandwich (granary bread, butter), cranberry juice, satsuma
2 sausages and veg (carrots, broccoli, leeks, swede, sprouts). cherry yoghurt.
Plus water and herbal tea (3 herbal teas, 2 water)

Tuesday
2 cups of tea
2 weetabix
standard size bag of maltesers and coffee
2 pieces granary toast with half an avocado and sunflower seeds. Greek yoghurt with mixed ground seeds. Bag of salt and vinegar squares. Cranberry juice
shakshuka with extra veg in (courgette, aubergine, kale as well as the peppers, onion and tomatoes), feta and hummus on top, flatbread on the side
water, herbal tea as Monday

Weds and Thurs basically as Tuesday except Wednesday I had toast and marmite with my coffee, no crisps either day. Dinner Wednesday was lentil and fennel stew with rice, had a digestive biscuit afterwards, last night pork casserole with mash, green beans and broccoli.

Putting aside the fact that she was rude, I don’t think I eat that much? Basically 3 meals and one snack. Would you consider this a lot of food?

Now I'm gagging for maltesers 😋but the shops are closed 😯

Tell her to FUCK OFF!!!!!! She’s not your Mum 🤬🤬🤬🤬

OP your diet is so bloody good! If I ate like you consistently I’d be skinny. She’s weird

I didn’t read what you ate all week because it’s completely irrelevant. You’re being unreasonable for taking any notice of her. If you’re concerned about your weight see your doctor

How rude! What business is it of hers, how much you eat or when or how... 😡

Um, why do you care? It's concerning that a comment from some irrelevant lodger has you this insecure...

The ONLY person who can answer this is your doctor.

What you should be eating. When you eat. What you eat. How much... it varies wildly.

Commenting on someone's eating habits without being their doctor, nutritionist, responsible for their well being,(a parent, a partner of a person with an eating disorder) or paying for their food(ie: i have to be careful with portion and snacks to have enough food to last the whole month), all while being privy to their daily routines, medical issues, etc... is inappropriate and rude.

Hi there, I hate people 'observing' - taking note of - what I eat. I feel guilty if I put on weight and feel judged - and have found myself eating out of sight to avoid this. It sounds as though you are very aware of your eating habits. I just wondered if eating habits had been discussed between you.

@Marchforward - whether or not the OP is overweight is not relevant at all.

They can eat any food they wish in THEIR home, and guests have NO right to comment about weight or food habits!

Neither do you, really.

Ignore the checker fucker, your diet sounds great!

irrelevant what you eat. She has no right to tell you what to eat or to even monitor this. what is next, your sleep routine, work hours, when you wash etc.. get rid of her as fast as you can...

Yeah you need to tell her to move out. What a rude weirdo. You don’t police other people’s eating habits (unless they’re anorexic and you’re very worried, or morbidly obese).

I can’t believe she had the gall to say that to you! And to be clear: a rice cake with a coffee is not overeating!

And I’m a size 10, by the way.

There are plenty of cultures where another person's weight is considered fair game for public consumption and, for women, even tied to comments about childbearing and fertility. It's abhorrent but it exists. Don't make generalizations about the entire world based on your limited and clearly biased exposure to only specific countries.

@Clymene couldn't agree more.

Give the lodger notice to leave!

Idk what's weirder - your super detailed food diary when you're unconcerned with your weight, your lunch monitor lodger, or you giving enough of a shit about said lunch monitor's opinion that you need to ask if she is right.

It's all weird.

I posted on Friday which is when I had the chocolate rice cake and she commented which prompted my post. I posted my food for mon-Thur because by that point on Friday I’d only had breakfast and was in the process of drinking my coffee and eating the rice cake. I’m not sure why some posters are convinced I’m not being honest and are trying to catch me out, what would be the point? It’s not like I’ve posted an otherwise perfect diet and have omitted a rice cake to try to make it look better!

I’ve explained this in a previous post. It’s pretty easy to remember what I’ve eaten when I’ve had basically the same thing most days and my evening meals are on a planner on the fridge! Sorry you find it weird though.

He or she might be right. Maybe not too much food but maybe the wrong food. However the topic of food and weight is a personal and sensitive topic and under the circumstances that kind of advice is often going to be unwelcome.

As we get a little older and particularly mums, we become insulin resistant, meaning that our bodies cannot cope with large quantities of glucose which is in fruit, starchy carbohydrates (pasta, rice, potatoes, bread) and of course sugar and sugary products. Because of insulin resistance we tend to pile on more weight. Eating more protein, healthy fats and green vegetables and less of those above will help control our weight.

This is just how our days are set up though isn’t it. When I went to school in France my school dinners were a portion of cheese, a salad, meat, carb and veg and either a yoghurt or fruit compote to finish. We had 45 mins to an hour to eat and then another hour playtime. We then had a snack after school (often baguette with Nutella or squares of chocolate pushed through) and then dinner was again meat and veg, salad and cheese but not a huge amount of each.

Here school dinners are rubbish and tiny, or you take a packed lunch and children have under half an hour to eat and the more time they take the less playtime they have so they rush through it so you need to make sure they get a decent evening meal.

Also most people don’t have time in their working day to cook and eat a full meal at lunch.

I don’t generally need to snack in the afternoon though (obviously sometimes I do if I feel hungry) so I don’t think a smaller lunch is always bad.

How much you eat is none of her business. You are a grown adult, you are able to gauge whether or not you eat too much. Do you sit around on your butt all day? Or are you moving about? This is really the question to ask yourself when asking 'am I eating too much'. If you sit down all day and snack between meals and eat bread a lot, you can put on weight. Wheat is the real fat producer. Crisps and wheat. If you are active, you likely need those calories. It is all relative. IF you worked hard labour all day you'd need much more food then that! Eat what you need to be healthy! Don't worry about what other people think. x

@Orcubed

thank fuck her place should be ready in the first! However, I'd tell her today, that no matter what, she needs to move out in the 1st, if it's not ready she needs to book into a hotel (or whatever! But she needs to go). She would NOT be welcome back either.

id also tell her that WFH was it part of the deal (unless it was ???) and that if she needs to WFH this week, she has to be in her room, not the communal area.

As for your food intake, it sounds a totally normal amount & probably healthier than many. You enjoy it, don't change anything.

Regardless of how much or little you eat, it has absolutely f all to do with her. She needs to get packing her bags!

Perhaps they're socially challenged and it was a rather poor attempt at starting conversation.
They could be autistic, and speak their mind with no concept of socially accepted boundaries.

Either way, it's your home, and you can chose who pays to share it with you.

I don't really care what you eat (although it sounds fine to me.) Just tell her it's none of her business. No excuses, no explanations, no apologies. Just that. 'I eat what I want in my own home.'