Neighbour rang the police on us!

[Lonelymum27]

Miss busy body next door has just called the police on us! 10 minute argument and I went off upstairs to bed with DS. We’re both absolutely knackered DS isn’t sleeping so this has taking a toll on us and this is what caused the argument.

she’s rang the police on a few people on the estate before over nothing really,nothing I’d get worked up about.

police have just came banging down our doors and windows blue lights shouting police !gave us the shock of our lives left within minutes as they seen we was fine.

We feel absolutely humiliated now! AIBU to go round in the morning or should I just leave it?

Quite not white.

Can't believe you were shouting at each other loud enough for the neighbour to hear! and for 10 mins. Don't you know how to have a 🐍snake hissing argument late on? Seriously your poor DS doesn't need to hear it or your neighbours- reign it in and your no-one will call the police on you. We all get stressed but you don't need to involve everyone.

I will remain eternally grateful to the neighbours who called the police when they knew what they were hearing was not ok.

There is not doubt in my mind we owe them both our lives

OP, i hope you are ok and that your baby is asleep now. My advice is to step away from this thread. If only we could all be as perfect as the previous posters? Wake up tomorrow after (hopefully) a good nights sleep and feel better.
Talk with you DH in the morning and promise each other that you won't give your neighbour a chance to meddle again.
There is a lot of snobbery on this thread and it is upsetting.
I only joined Mumsnet recently as I had a question to ask about my dog. I had so many wonderful and helpful responses.
Maybe stay away from AIBU in the future? It doesn't seem very nice to me, hope you are ok x

If I heard a woman with a young child being shouted at I'd probably ring the police as well, especially if it went on for 10 minutes and your son was there. she might've thought you were being abused, she did the right thing,

I would have done the same as your neighbour. A girl near where we live was stabbed to death recently by her partner. Apparently someone heard a scream but no police was called. Your neighbour did the right thing.

Agreed. Learn the hiss!

Do you were actually shouting like that in-front of 3 children?! Even better!

If she could hear you shouting then your poor little boy must have been really frightened considering how loud it must have been in your home where he was bless him.

Loud enough in front of a young child for someone to hear and call the police? I don't think most people have done that, no.

Everyone has had arguments in front of their kids (when completely knackered), but there’s a big difference between two tired parents having a minor argument and screaming at each other enough to concern the neighbours.

I’d knock on the door tomorrow and explain the situation with not sleeping etc and apologise.

Kids were in bed baby DS was awake in his cot and we was on top of the stairs. Probably the worst place to be shouting at each other as the walls are thin but hey! It is what it is.

You don't believe people haven't ever had a ten minute shouting match in front of their child loud enough for a neighbour to hear? I think it's sad (and worrying) that you think that's normal tbh.

If your neighbour can hear you and is upset then your son can hear you. Take an anger management course. Practice living in a civilised respectful home and listening to each other. Consider what each other thinks and speak to each other more quietly.
Loud outbursts never improve any situation unless you are warning someone of an impending car about to run them over.. And shouting frightens kids.

Thank you I know really I shouldn’t have posted here as no one will understand but sometimes you just want to talk to someone. But thank you for caring xx

They were in bed but that makes no difference when it comes to them hearing such a loud argument. They must have been frightened. I wonder if you went and reassured them afterwards and apologised for scaring them.

That’s not what I said stop twisting it, I said I don’t believe she’s never had a 10 minute argument with her husband.

No kids slept through it as I said it was 10 minutes.

Well I am no expert but the few people I know of who are the victims of dv, never have shouting arguments or any arguments they are too scared to raise their voices and fight back. So if there are two people shouting at each other and this isn't how they normally behave I would assume that for some reason they are pissed off with each other.

You're right, you're not an expert

Bloody hell, no comment on shouting within relationships but I can't believe all the outraged "you were shouting loud enough for a neighbour to hear?!" comments 🤣

I know this is mumsnet and you all probably live in lovely detached 4 beds, but it's really not unusual to hear your neighbours, you know!

I live in a Victorian terrace and can hear when my neighbours cough. If they ever raised their voices even a little, I'd certainly know about it!

I grew up in a 1950s semi which was even worse, we could hear literally everything from next door. Everything.

Nope. as we're adults and can hold our shit together.

That’s not what I said stop twisting it, I said I don’t believe she’s never had a 10 minute argument with her husband.

So to clarify, do you believe it's normal for a couple to shout at each other so loudly neighbours can hear, for ten minutes, while their three young children are in the same house?

You don't seem to think it's an unusual set of circumstances and seem surprised most people haven't done that.

Lots of people have disagreements, yes. To the level you did, with children in the house, no.

I think she was over the top to call the police over an argument next door. Ridiculous.

Going forward, I’d make sure not to give her any ammunition. I’d talk to dh and decode together to not raise our voices to each other again, to talk through disagreements civilly and calmly.

These things happen before you even know, I realize that, an argument gets out of hand and voices are raised. Unfortunately you’ve got a busybody with a long nose who probably presses her ear up against the wall to catch every word then calls police and she then has a drama to relay to everybody. That’s how those kinds of people are. Don’t give her anything to work with.

No kids slept through it as I said it was 10 minutes.

I used to say I didn't hear my parents fighting.

I did. It made me anxious and I didn't want to make them more cross or stressed so I didn't let them know.

They would still say we never heard the worst rows. We did.