To be raging that DH puked on the carpet

[Willyswaggingfinger]

He's not drunk.
He's had a bad stomach all day, lots of loud burping and moaning that he feels ill. Although he felt well enough to eat a nandos at 2pm.
At around midnight he goes to the bathroom and I hear him retching. He comes back to bed and carries on with the loud burping.
At half past midnight he vomits twice on the bedroom carpet on the way to the bathroom.
Im raging because my argument is that if you feel sick you keep a bowl next to you. I've known a grown adult vomit on the carpet.
He says I'm disrespectful and unkind to have a go at him because he's ill.

OP, there seem to be a few issues.

I'd find your DH's behaviour really irritating too - feeling ill, burping, getting Nando's, retching & still ending up puking on the carpet. As an adult he could have handled that better.

However your other posts talk about possible PND, not feeling anything & your DH maybe leaving you.

Please please make a GP appointment to discuss how you are feeling 💐

OP I'm a Midwife. This sounds very typical of PND. The 'indifferent' feeling is what I hear all the time. One of the other key symptoms of depression is feeling easily irritable. It sounds like you have recognised that you feel 'different' and are behaving differently to normal. Family have recognised it too.

You need to think very carefully about what you do next or you could be letting a temporary illness sabotage your, your children's and your husband's stability and happiness. Having a parent with PND or other untreated depression does sadly impact children. You deserve to be enjoying this part of your life, you really don't want to look back in a few years and wish you had handled it differently. Nobody is saying you have to take medication if you don't want to, nobody is saying you have to do anything. You do owe it to yourself (first and foremost) but also your children and family to look at getting some help. If you still aren't happy in your marriage when you are in a good head space then you can make whatever decisions you need to.

The puking is a side issue, not ideal, slightly annoying but not really grounds to be cruel to someone.

If he was well enough to eat a Nandos then head week enough to maker it to the toilet, dirty bastard. I'd be fuming.

In sickness...and in health just sayin

" then he's well enough" ,. Sorry for typos

We had the sickness bug a few weeks ago so the rounds. My son sat up in bed and threw up all over his new bed and floor. After that he was sick all night, buf luckily managed to make it to the toilet.

my 6yo was sick outside aldi suddenly, she was absolutely fine and when k was paying she said she felt sick. We ran outside just in time!

Why does it bother you so much?
I would never dare come on here to pick apart someone who speaks differently than myself.And I see it all the time,but that's part of us being from different parts of the world.
There's no need to be disrespectful.
And I was 9 when that movie came out,I missed my calling I suppose

So when women act unreasonably it is excused as having period, hormones, pnd, menopause, baby brain is there anything missed from that?

If it's bothering others don't you think you should seek help?

I think you’re being harsh.
If he was hungover I would be fuming but he’s poorly. I’d be looking after my DH and feel sorry for him not be angry. I am sure it wasn’t intentional!

OP is getting a really hard time here. Let's remember that she's the first time mother of a young baby and we don't know anything about the relationship/family dynamic.

Is OP's DH the type of person who won't usually look after himself if unwell? I know that I was very annoyed with my DH when he said he was ill and felt unwell, but rather than staying in bed he insisted in lying on the living room sofa watching football, which made it harder for me to parent our two young DC.

Yes it would have been nice to get him a bowl, but we don't know if he'd insisted that he wasn't going to be sick.

My bottom line is that once you become a parent you need to take reasonable steps to look after yourself so that you can look after your children. That means that if you're ill you rest, take medication if necessary and see a doctor promptly if needed.

@Willyswaggingfinger how much worse does it need to get for you to see someone? When it gets to the point where you were the first time, will you be in a position to ask for help?

Sorry but he's an idiot. As a grown up I would hold the vomit back, cover my mouth, and at least make it to a room with a hard floor before letting it all out if I absolutely couldn't get to the toilet or sink.

I would not vomit all over the carpet, whatever it took. It absolutely stinks and ruins a carpet once it's been vomited on. We had to pull up a whole carpet and have it redone after our son threw up on it spontaneously (he was 3 and there was no warning at-all he was unwell). No amount of professional cleaning, baking powder or febreze was fixing it.

It just seems like a childish and stupid thing to do, however you are feeling.
If you already know you feel sick and have already been wretching over the toilet you set yourself up with everything you might need, or ask for help, and be prepared to get to the bathroom very quickly.

I wouldn't expect my partner who is in bed with the baby to jump to attention and start getting things ready for me.
If I felt like i couldn't physically get myself a bucket, I would ask and I'd remain in the bathroom until I had what I needed at my bedside.

Honestly, it's ridiculous and I wouldn't have any tolerance for a grown adult who already knew they were feeling sick throwing up all over the carpet.

Who actually says "you all" though?*
Unless they are an extra in Steel Magnolias*

Another bizarre post. Lots of people say that?! You say it when addressing a room/group rather than a single person. A totally normal thing to say.

OP get some help for PND. Your child deserves it.

I’m from the east of England and I sometimes type y’all or m’dear on informal emails to my team never thought that much about it and no one has ever questioned it or even commented about it.

You sound incredibly uncaring

I'd say it's better to use a bucket, or I'd say "pail" due to the splatter. The puke would land, then instantly bounce back onto one's face. And hair. Messy.
I also think, although I'd obviously clean it, my future relationship with said mixing bowl would be adversely affected 🤣

Agree with PP you shouldn't let what is possibly a temporary illness ruin a relationship with what you yourself have labelled a "lovely man" (they're not out there in abundance you know!). You don't sound happy, OP; and if seeing a GP might help, isn't it worth the hassle?

You is already plural, there is no need to change it when addressing a group.

I would have gotten a bowl to avoid the 'possibility' of vomit on the carpet. I keep a dedicated vom jug in my bedside drawer as I suffer with constant nausea due to meds.

Even though many years ago I had two young children in bunk beds, and was called in the middle of the night with 'mummy mummy I feel sick' I ran in and found bottom bunk child had thrown up/was still vomiting all over in bed. At which point, top bunk child leant over the side and vomited copious amounts of partly digested spag bol all over me! It was a total vomfest.

I remember standing there not quite knowing what to clean up first, and called (then) husband for help. He took one look and said god no I hate puke it makes me feel sick', and promptly went back to bed.

Ok word police! We will all only talk exactly as you do going forward 😆

He's ill why wouldn't you help him?

Some of the replies on this thread are mental. I'm recovering from a vomiting bug. I ate lunch at 2pm started to feel a bit queasy at 3pm and by 6pm had horrendous V&D. I could hardly move, no way could I have held it in, or run to get a bucket or whatever. I was sick where I lay but thankfully DH had got me a basin.

If he'd been raging at me for being sick I honestly think I would be considering leaving him for being a monumental arsehole.

Some of these replies! OP is sleeping in a stinking bedroom with a 5m old because a grown man who had been feeling nauseous for hours didn't have the wits to think 'Hang, on, might be sick at some point...bowl?' Yet SHE was supposed to either anticipate it, or leave her baby alone in the bed to get him a bowl?
And now she isn't entitled to be upset at vomit on a bedroom carpet, which any normal person would be repulsed by; but instead all thoughts should be with the Lord and master because he's 'poorly'. Be kind OP! Your man needs you!