New job - feeling a bit shocked by something that happened

[bagpuss90]

Sorry me again 🙄I’m semi retired , I started a new part time job today. Everyone was lovely, very helpful and friendly . I’ve no complaints at all. However I overheard some of the staff laughing about one of their colleagues who I gathered was off work with stress and anxiety. Two of them were mimicking their colleague having a panic attack and hyper ventilating. Obviously I don’t know the back story and I’ve obviously never met their colleague - but AIBU to be a bit shocked by this. I’ve suffered panic attacks myself -though thankfully not for years . But I know how debilitating they can be. I just thought it was really cruel and unkind. It’s put me off the job tbh though otherwise I did enjoy the day

These two are probably quite ignorant people. Just ignore them for now. Of course it isn't acceptable.

I probably wouldn't judge them on this alone - you don't know the back story and maybe this sick colleague is one of those we've all worked with who've faked had every illness going and had time off for the death of 13 grandparents and counting. You said they were all lovely so maybe give them the benefit of the doubt but absolutely not ok if they're taking the piss out of genuine illness (MH related or otherwise).

Sensible advice to follow.

I understand why this was shocking op. I don't think it's normal or acceptable. Maybe a good few years ago it might have been. I suppose how hard jobs are to get and the feel otherwise would dictate how I proceeded.

Me neither. And my team work with clients with MH issues, so it would be very much frowned upon.

This would definitely not happen in my workplace.

We may have a moan about someone who is on a bit of a power trip or if we’ve been given extra work to do etc but none of us would take the piss out of someone like that.

Either they’re complete twats or the person is actually known to be a faker (like Gillian McKeith fainting on I’m a celeb).

I would carry on for now but keep your guard up a bit.
If the environment is too bitchy then I would look for another job soon.

My colleagues apparently did it about me when I became very ill.

How would we know? It may be the case we are all being gossiped about or mimicked... we would not necessarily know

It is nasty, but very common in little cliquey groups of colleagues (usually women, I've found). They're that used to it, they don't even realise how it looks/sounds to others.

Are you saying it's acceptable workplace behaviour?

Not that unusual, but doesn't mean it is ok. However, don't let it affect you too much, OP. If you enjoyed the job then focus on that and don't be put off but a few bad apples.

If you think what I said is a paraphrase of what you said, I would be surprised if you are part of any workplace.

They have just given you a heads up to the type of people they are, I would take careful note.

Not nice.

I would be wary.

I'm asking for clarification of your personal opinion.

I don't expect to be the focus of insult from you for asking.

Definitely not normal in my workplace. It would likely result in serious disciplinary action if it did happen.

Completely unprofessional and nasty. Can you keep your distance from them?

I would quit.

And tell them why. Little bitches.

I’ve had a full-on panic attack and I could not breathe. Which made me panic more!

So not normal. In my office you'd get a disciplinary for doing that in fact!

What horrible unkind people.
it would concern me that it might be the general office culture in that company, I wouldn’t want to work in that type of environment.

That ^^

Nasty fuckers.

Yeah absolutely wouldn’t be okay in my workplace (thankfully).

On the face of it it sounds very nasty. But given that you otherwise had a good first day, I would try not to dwell on it. For all you know, the person who's off sick could be a massive drama queen who has fake panic attacks. I know I know, extremely unlikely, but you never know for sure. I went to school with someone who faked blackouts.

I would avoid these colleagues as much as possible but I wouldn't quit the job.

Grim behaviour. I'd wonder if their colleague's stress and anxiety was caused by bullying and harrassment in the workplace.

Not a positive first impression for you, their new team member. If this were a personal relationship, Mumsnet would say that they're already showing you who they are; believe them.

I'd look for a more wholesome environment if you can.

Not normal but you don't know the backstory. Stay put for now, head down. I had the joy of working with someone who used anxiety as an excuse to do fuck all work and I had to carry the burden of some of her work for almost 2 years, until they finally got rid of her (because she was shit at her job and incredibly lazy). It made my job hell and my sympathy ran out very quickly. I NEVER verbalised any of it but I secretly hated her. I was very happy when they got rid. I can imagine someone younger or more immature mocking it.

Maybe they have form for it. Remember it's your first day and yoi know nothing about the people there - yet