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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Sunday morning lifts and bloody McDonald's

548 replies

reddwarfgeek · 04/03/2023 21:01

Just a rant really.
My partner is going to away football to tomorrow. He'll be out of the house all day from 8am to 9pm. He's asked me for a lift to the train station, but not content with that he wants to go via McDonald's for a breakfast. It's slightly out of the way and will mean leaving house at 7:30am to get an 8:45am train, thus adding extra time on, probably means get up at 6:30am. I know that isn't that early for some people but I work 4 days and we have an early start Saturdays for DDs hobby. Sunday is the only day we have that's more relaxing. I have to get DD (5) sorted up and dressed etc.
He said the reason he wants to go to McDonald's is he won't have any other chance to eat anything all day! I find this hard to believe! The train journey is long but what about the other 10 hours? Anyway, we had a big argument and he said I'm a moaning cunt and that I'm making him drink on an empty stomach. Aww ..didums! 13 hours free time on a Sunday apparently isn't enough 🙈 it all seems a bit ungrateful.

I've no issue with the lift I just don't want to go to McDonald's at 8am on a Sunday morning thus likely making us late. The one nearby has issues with being short staffed and getting orders wrong, so I've no doubt it wouldn't be straightforward. We do have food in the house to eat for breakfast, he just doesn't want it.
AIBU?

OP posts:
Nanny0gg · 04/03/2023 23:39

Theoldwoman · 04/03/2023 22:36

I would do it in a heartbeat for any family member. It’s what we do for each other.

Whilst dragging a 5 year old out of bed on a Sunday?

Whilst being called a cunt?

Whilst knowing the state he's going to come home in?

And all so the manchild can have a McDs not make his own sandwich? (no doubt you'd do that too for him?)

Original poster
reddwarfgeek · 04/03/2023 23:41

@Nanny0gg You've hit the nail on the head.

OP posts:
PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 04/03/2023 23:41

Sod that. He can get a sandwich on the train.

Sarahcoggles · 04/03/2023 23:43

paulaparticles · 04/03/2023 22:23

I would have just done it. I mean seriously would none of you on here do this for your husband 😬 ok without the name calling but aren't we supposed to help each other out in a relationship. Then you wonder why so many split up nowadays.

You'd get up much earlier on a Sunday morning because he can't be bothered to pour milk on a bowl of cornflakes? Knowing you're going to be doing child care alone all day, and he'll roll in total pissed later ?

NotNowFGS · 04/03/2023 23:45

Just say no. No I will give you a lift to the station but not via McDonalds.
Or no full stop. You don't have to be a doormat.

GrumpyPanda · 04/03/2023 23:45

Voted YABU but changed my vote now you've said you won't be giving him a lift.

Mum23amazingkids · 04/03/2023 23:48

He gets to spend his Sunday away from family with friends playing and you are a cunt fur wanting to nit get up at 6 am on a Sunday . He had better start walking now because he would get no lift from me let alone mc Donald’s . How old is he ? 5 ?

Teaandtoast3 · 04/03/2023 23:50

He can fuck right off in my opinion. I wouldn’t even give him a lift.

Aiimeee · 04/03/2023 23:53

I'd do it for my DH no problem, because we get on great, love and respect each other and have no issue helping each other. Every relationship is different though of course.

mellicauli · 04/03/2023 23:59

When I go to the football, I can buy food at the train station on the way. Or at the train station at the other end . Out of train station, the route to the stadium is lined with shops and burger vans and stalls selling everything from sweets to pies. There is also a range of food for sale in the stadium (at a price, but some of it is edible).

I guess he could probably put a sandwich together before he went if we was that desperate.

So you are right to find it difficult to believe that it is strictly necessary to get you and the kids up at 6.30 on a Sunday.

Why doesn't he go tonight and put it in the microwave in the morning? It won't taste any worse than fresh.

MysteryBelle · 05/03/2023 00:02

He called you a moaning c? That’s the end of the marriage for me. I’m sorry, those kinds of names and insults show his contempt, hatred, vulgarity, and utter lack of class. Drop him in the bin. No lift, no McDonald’s, no nothing.

MysteryBelle · 05/03/2023 00:04

My dh has never in 26 years called me a name or “moaning”.

Raise your standards way way up.

dontgobaconmyheart · 05/03/2023 00:06

It sounds like you've slipped into the role of his mother and he is playing a (deeply unpleasant) teenager OP. I can't believe he regularly calls you a c*, that's disgusting and so is he.

A grown adult whinging at their partner for a lift and a McDonalds, then trying manipulation and guilting (+ lying nonsense) when he doesn't get his own way - how is that in the least bit attractive or tenable in a relationship. Of course he can get his own bloody food or arrange his own transport, he just doesn't think he needs to because that's what you're for, and your lie in and general happiness are very far down on the list for him and his own are top.

It's grim OP, something becoming normalised doesn't make it right. Consider whether you want to spend the rest of your life with someone like this, who talks to you like this, and imagine how much relaxation time you could have if you binned the rude little prat off.

Seeleyboo · 05/03/2023 00:15

He said I'm a moaning cunt

Well yes darling. But I will be a warm toastie cunt in bed. Now fuck off and get an Uber

HeavenIsAHalfpipe · 05/03/2023 00:18

Seeleyboo · 05/03/2023 00:15

He said I'm a moaning cunt

Well yes darling. But I will be a warm toastie cunt in bed. Now fuck off and get an Uber

Grin
BishBashBoop · 05/03/2023 00:24

Aiimeee · 04/03/2023 23:53

I'd do it for my DH no problem, because we get on great, love and respect each other and have no issue helping each other. Every relationship is different though of course.

I suspect your DH isnt calling you a cunt whilst asking for a lift though 🙄

Aiimeee · 05/03/2023 00:40

BishBashBoop · 05/03/2023 00:24

I suspect your DH isnt calling you a cunt whilst asking for a lift though 🙄

Show quote history

No we wouldn't have the massive argument over it and no he wouldn't call me a cunt, because as I said everyone's relationship is different.

CMO · 05/03/2023 00:41

FlutterbButterfly · 04/03/2023 21:07

Honestly? This is LTB territory, who speaks to anyone like that?

Show quote history

Totally this. Why do you put up with this abuse?

Definitelycross · 05/03/2023 01:05

Seeleyboo · 05/03/2023 00:15

He said I'm a moaning cunt

Well yes darling. But I will be a warm toastie cunt in bed. Now fuck off and get an Uber

😂

ReneBumsWombats · 05/03/2023 01:13

Aiimeee · 04/03/2023 23:53

I'd do it for my DH no problem, because we get on great, love and respect each other and have no issue helping each other. Every relationship is different though of course.

Does OP's relationship bear much resemblance to yours?

And would you get the children out of bed to do it?

twix23 · 05/03/2023 01:16

ghostyslovesheets · 04/03/2023 21:03

he said I'm a moaning cunt for that alone he'd be getting a sodding Uber in the moring

This

Floralnomad · 05/03/2023 02:20

After language like that he’d not only be getting himself to the station he would be coming home to changed locks and all his belongings outside in bin bags .

Forgooodnesssakenow · 05/03/2023 03:44

paulaparticles · 04/03/2023 22:23

I would have just done it. I mean seriously would none of you on here do this for your husband 😬 ok without the name calling but aren't we supposed to help each other out in a relationship. Then you wonder why so many split up nowadays.

Have I done something unreasonable to help my husband out in the 16 yes we've been together? Yes!

Would either of us expect to go away for an entire weekend day expecting the other to parent alone and still expect additional lifts especially beyond the necessary? Fuck no! 1 of us might offer but we'd not inconvenience each other or the kids.

Infact in this house the person getting the day off would be falling over themselves to help first, dressing the kids, making breakfast, setting up the buggy by the door, filling water bottles and making packed lunches if the one parenting had plans with the kids. Etc etc.

Sounds like you're worried your relationship will fail if you don't be d to your husband's will/ keep him happy. Worth a think about

Forgooodnesssakenow · 05/03/2023 03:46

Aiimeee · 04/03/2023 23:53

I'd do it for my DH no problem, because we get on great, love and respect each other and have no issue helping each other. Every relationship is different though of course.

Do you have small children you'd be dragging out of bed? Then solo parenting alld ay?

Because my husband and I love and respect one another and our kids and as above definitely wouldn't expect lifts etc in this scenario.

HelloBunny · 05/03/2023 03:49

C, F & any manner of swear words are very much a part of everyday language where I come from. MIL swears like a sailor. Nobody bats an eyelid...

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