Sunday morning lifts and bloody McDonald's

[reddwarfgeek]

Just a rant really.
My partner is going to away football to tomorrow. He'll be out of the house all day from 8am to 9pm. He's asked me for a lift to the train station, but not content with that he wants to go via McDonald's for a breakfast. It's slightly out of the way and will mean leaving house at 7:30am to get an 8:45am train, thus adding extra time on, probably means get up at 6:30am. I know that isn't that early for some people but I work 4 days and we have an early start Saturdays for DDs hobby. Sunday is the only day we have that's more relaxing. I have to get DD (5) sorted up and dressed etc.
He said the reason he wants to go to McDonald's is he won't have any other chance to eat anything all day! I find this hard to believe! The train journey is long but what about the other 10 hours? Anyway, we had a big argument and he said I'm a moaning cunt and that I'm making him drink on an empty stomach. Aww ..didums! 13 hours free time on a Sunday apparently isn't enough 🙈 it all seems a bit ungrateful.

I've no issue with the lift I just don't want to go to McDonald's at 8am on a Sunday morning thus likely making us late. The one nearby has issues with being short staffed and getting orders wrong, so I've no doubt it wouldn't be straightforward. We do have food in the house to eat for breakfast, he just doesn't want it.
AIBU?

What a 🔔🔚

I'd definitely take him for his Maccies. And then leave him there. Let him find his own way to the station! Sounds like someone's being a cunt here and it isn't you OP. Definitely YANBU

Didn't I say I would 🙄 not as part of an abusive relationship though. We look after and out for each other and help each other out and share CHILDCARE as you call it.

Op I hope you ring Women’s Aid and start the leaving process. You can do it. Your life doesn’t have to be so horrible.

@JJWT I wish his sister had taken him back to theirs tonight. But she wouldn't think to do this. His family don't know a lot of this. She's a lovely woman but we aren't close, I can't confide in her as she tells MIL everything and MIL has form for being very difficult.

Thanks everyone. I'll ride the night out and will get through it.

Same age as my OH.

you deserve better than this my love. Take care of yourself and prioritise yourself and your children. Sending you hugs xxx

Absolutely not. V happily married here stranger on the Internet 😚 I'd commented before the poster said it was a regular piss take actually...we look after each other in this house no abuse or controlling behaviour just love, appreciation and respect sorry to disappoint you're way of thinking 🤔

Ok so he has a drink problem as well as being demanding and verbally abusive.

Please separate from him @reddwarfgeek xx

God this makes me so sad for you and for your daughter. She’s got a strong mum though! But you deserve so so much more. Life would be far easier with out this dick. You know it would.

Pack an emergency bag for you and your child so you can leave quickly if you need to.

I’m sad about this too - you deserve so much better

You won't be missing much that's positive in your life if you leave him @reddwarfgeek .

Money is nothing in the great scheme of things. I'm not well off, but happy.

I put up with verbal/emotional abuse for years OP. It was just how things were & part of me didn't see that he was abusive, so I just accepted it. Leaving seems hard, but what gave me the motivation to leave was realising that if I stayed, my kids would think that I wasn't important as well. They would grow up thinking women don't deserve to be happy & that abuse is ok if it's from a partner. You can start again without him if you really want to. The feeling of being able to actually relax at home, not tread on eggshells or be abused for nothing is so good. Your freedom and wellbeing are important, as is that of your children. Please don't stay if you're not happy. Life really is too short x

Sounds like he's an awful partner. I know you have listed reasons to stay, but honestly they're not good enough. You can do so much better than this. Leaving can be hard, but staying in the long term will be harder.

Also very concerning that he's 37 and still behaving like he's a young lad. I know someone like this of a similar age who will often drunk text me when he's out with the lads watching football. It's such a turn off.

There’s a lovely word in the English language, it starts with N and ends with O. You don’t wanna do something you don’t have to. People choose to do
things because they get similar allowances as how relationships tend to work. If that’s not the case then it’s not a great relationship because it’s not really based on equality.

If she had picked him up surely she realised the state of him?
I’ve have locked the doors and told him to return him to his mother so she could see for herself. Life is too short to spend it with someone like that. Your poor daughter. Coming back and playing music?! That’s not normal. He sounds like a teenager.

He’s nasty and you are worth more. Tell him tomorrow that he needs to leave the house and not come back, change the locks and stop living with this arsehole. You will survive without him.

Op how easy is it for you to split? Is the house owned or rented?

But either way get some help from women's aid you deserve so much better.

You’d drag a 5 year old out of bed at 6am, then into the cold, then for 2.5 hour car journey??.. That’s unreasonable in itself. Not just so he can drink himself into oblivion at a footy match.. Then OP has to endure his behaviour / hangover the following day

PPP on his part. Can’t he take some Sarnies and a banana.

Omg

Thinking of you this evening OP. I can’t imagine how you must have been feeling, waiting for him to arrive home, and second guessing his drunk behaviour. You don’t deserve this. x

You’re not looking forward to him coming home drunk on 15 pints of whatever?
How is he when drunk, funny, pukey or violent?

Why isn't he driving himself to the game?

Presumably because he couldn't drink the 15 pints if he did that.