Upset a staff member in tesco.. feel bad now but was I wrong?

[SpringIsSpringing23]

Last night I popped into tesco. At the checkout, the young lad (can't have been more than 18) was looking at his phone, didn't speak to me, kept chewing his nails and sticking his fingers in his mouth.

When it came to pay he didn't tell me how much. I was getting irritated at this point and just stood there until he looked up and I said you've not told me how much (obviously I could see on the screen). I said "you're too busy playing on your phone, and it's not hygienic to be chewing your nails when you're going to be handling food". I didn't have a go but said it in a firm manner.

He went bright red, muttered sorry and didn't give any eye contact the rest of the transaction. I then realised he had tears running down his face. I said I'm sorry, is everything OK? He ignored me so as I left I explained to the security guard (nobody else around) what happened and he said he'd go talk to him.

I feel absolutely awful that I've upset somebody... but was I wrong to have said something to him?

Difference is it’s the kids job. He represents the company he’s working for.

I was working with a student who was talking to me about filling the shelves. Had to remind him that using the f word wasn’t appropriate on the shop floor. He was young and was just talking to me like he talks to his mates. Fine in the warehouse but it was something he needed to be made aware of. It’s their first job, they don’t know until it’s pointed out.

Why just women? I'd say the same to a man.

Good question as the senior managers don't wear uniform - but generally, anyone who is standing around chatting but obviously not shopping and not seeming to be on a particular job is a manager! There's always a shift leader/duty manager though that you can ask to see.

Sounds like he was nervous biting his nails I would not have spoken to a young person like this who’s clearly showing signs of anxiety.
He could be on the phone to check Tesco app or some rules of the job, could be gif 1st shift.

If you can see the price why does he have to say it? The self checkout doesn’t have people saying out loud what’s to pay.

I always find it strange people feel the need to upset people.

I used to work at Tesco and I can confirm that, in my branch anyway, we were encouraged to keep our phones with us as our manger/colleagues would often text info to us. Plus there is the store app which we were expected to use.

Tesco also takes on quite a few young people with learning or physically disabilities. It’s part of some kind of job program.

OP, I really think you should reflect on your empathy for others. Whilst it sounds like he wasn’t offering the best customer services, was there any need to give him a telling off? Have you never glanced at you phone at work or got distracted by something? I certainly have. We are all human and sometimes it’s best to just cut someone a bit of slack instead of throwing a strop about some thing that’s actually quite minor.

Ah ring the store to apologize.if you are anything like me,it will play on your mind until you do.or maybe go into the store.yes it was a little on the crap side of customer service but just apologize again and forget about it 😊

It's OK to pick on young people but I am guessing you wouldn't have said that to an elderly gentleman.
My DD (then late teens) got a right ticking off by 2 middle aged ladies in M and S who accused her of being rude for looking at her phone and not helping them.
She doesn't even work in M and S but hey, they didn't let that stop them.

Nothing wrong with calling out poor service. You can’t just accept terrible service because of the small chance something could be wrong, otherwise anyone would have an excuse to be rude

I'd have said something to him.

But then, like you, I'd have felt incredibly guilty if he'd cried.

I think YABU in this case. If he'd JUST been on his phone, I might have thought 'typical rude phone-absorption', but the nailbiting and putting his fingers in his mouth in a public setting, and his crying in front of customers, are unusual, and may indicate that something else is going on. As pp have said, Tesco employs some people with learning and other disabilities, and if he did have such a disability, he may have been very sensitive to comments. Or he may have just received bad news on his phone. I don't think you should beat yourself up too much; you obviously didn't intend to hurt him, and you did try to deal with it by speaking to the security guard. And I doubt that he was upset JUST because of you. But still would have been better to be less harsh.

This!
don’t see how anyone could argue with this

Having his fingers in his mouth and then touching people’s food is gross and not acceptable. He needs to be told that regardless. End of

Yeah fine, tell him not to chew fingers but the op went on at length it seems and then told tales to the security guard. Bit of an ott response.

The thing is, having work in customer services myself, I can tell you that some people use their interactions with these workers as an opportunity to vent their frustrations and throw their weight around with someone that who they know well can’t answer back because of their job. It happens more to young customer service workers. I doubt the customers actually realise what a twat they are being at the time but probably think they are just standing up for good customer services standards or something.

If you really think you have received bad customer service. Maybe a quiet word with the manager, an email/phone call or kindly pointing it out to the staff member themselves. But even at that, remember we all human and have bad days. Customer service workers are generally poorly paid, stressed, young and inexperienced. You don’t have the right to embarrass them, patronise them, give them a telling off or insult them. Even if they are doing their job poorly.

My daughter works in a big department store. She’s started there at 16, now 17. Honestly some customers are absolutely horrendous. She’s been shouted at on several occasions. Luckily she doesn’t take it to heart but still.

You weren't wrong to call him out for bad hygiene and giving poor service. I worked checkouts in Tesco at age 18 and would never have been so rude to customers. My manager wouldn't have let me sit there on the phone either.

If he has anxiety and can't function on checkouts he could always stack shelves or work in the warehouse instead - something with less customer contact. Checkouts are a role where you need to be helpful, outgoing and friendly and the store training would tell you the same thing.

You probably did him a favour by not complaining to management as it's giving him the opportunity to fix the problem himself.

Of course you did t do wrong
Customer service has go e right downhill

He wouldn't do.it if he was running his own business.

Minimum wage, minimum effort 🙌having worked in customer service my whole adult life I don’t expect cashiers to talk to me as it is so tedious. He should of told you the total cost thought, this is a valid point definitely. But I’m not too bothered as long as people aren’t directly rude.

I think customer service is the wrong job for you!

I hope your dil is ok and hope everything was alright 💐@Littlefaeries

My son got back from work at McDonalds today very upset because someone shouted at him for another workers mistake.

I have no doubt that if he wasn’t a 5 foot 5, very slim young looking lad but was a 6ft gym goer the gammon faced wanker wouldn’t have picked on him.

He has social anxiety and it’s taken him over a year of being in work to start to feel confident and some cunt has knocked him back. It’s not necessary to speak to people like this, it has consequences and you wouldn’t do it to an adult.

What did the op do to bully the cashier?
He is getting paid to do a job to take money off customers who have bought goods. If he doesn't even have social skills to tell the customer how much they have to pay it's maybe not the job for him but the op did absolutely nothing wrong to call out poor basic customer service that he is getting paid a wage to do

Money is a motivator though.
When I started with my employer we had sales driven bonuses and we would have to interact with customers to try and create sales, when they realised this bred really toxic behaviour and we had no bonuses, customer service fell off a cliff. So they were forced to bring in customer service scores as part of our performance evaluations to improve it.
No one was OTT rude to customers, but there was also no OTT interactions.

Funny this thread should become active again, I've not long since referenced it on another thread about benefits and a poster saying that some people with MH issues or ND 'expect' to claim benefits rather than work and the gist was they don't try hard enough - maybe the attitudes on this thread are part of the reason that they struggle to get or keep work.
Nothing can interfere with the all important customer experience of buying a pint of milk can it, and if it does, well that person needs to be shoved off somewhere less visible instead of there being a bit of tolerance. People need to earn a living and not rely on benefits but my goodness, don't let the effects taint the customer at all.
As I said in a pp on this thread, as a society we're not really as inclusive as we pretend to be.

@Motheranddaughter

do you actually know the meaning of the word bully?