To think that Stacey Dooley isn't a realistic new mum role model for women

[NeverendingStory32]

I picked out Stacey Dooley because I've just been reading about her but I know this applies to many other celebrities. She gave birth to her daughter in January and she's already back to work and attending events. She's also posted photos of her slim post baby body and trendy, flattering outfits on social media. Obviously it depends on your experience of pregnancy and giving birth but does this image of post natal motherhood put pressure on women? To me, I see it as unrealistic for the majority of women, including myself and my own experiences. Why can't celebrities share more honest, typical reflections of early motherhood that the majority can relate to.

What do people think?

This. I have a friend who was back in her pre pregnancy jeans within a couple of days. I was always showered, dressed and made up too. I don’t recognise the postnatal shitshow I read about here at all.

I remember when having my DC one new mum had to get her DH to bring her in some pre pregnancy clothes, she literally deflated, for want of a better word, overnight.
Me, only my feet seemed to have shrunk, I walked through the corridor sounding like Pingu.

I know others have been onto say this already but why do you assume ALL 'real' women have a horrendous experience and spend months in their pj's crying after giving birth?

I had a small bump, a 6lbs oz baby and I was back in my jeans within about 3 weeks. I breastfed for 13 months exclusively. I was out and about and travelling long haul within a few months.

I didn't plan it this way, it's just the way it was for me. I would hate to think that people judged me for not being a dishevelled, overweight, over emotional mess...

6lb 10oz

I was a size 10 before getting pregnant and a size 8-10 within 8 weeks of birth. No dieting. Breast feeding made me skinny.

Stacey who? I don't follow celebs.

Somebody said yesterday on another thread

Why does she have to he a role model?

.

I quite like Stacey Dooley but it's just annoying to see that.

Why is it annoying? Should women hide away because they feel freakish having recovered from pregnancy and birth quite quickly?

I could understand you saying you're annoyed that more celebrities who have the opposite experience don't tend to publicise it, but you're annoyed at seeing Stacey publicise her quick recovery?

Why do (some of us) have this expectation for other women to be our role models?

And this idea of 'role model' seems to be pretty narrow – it's an expectation that women like Stacey should serve up their most private, difficult, emotional experiences so we feel better about ourselves.

It's a bit infantile. And no one expects this from men.

Does not following celebs take away your ability to quickly Google them?

Sorry @MissHavishamsMouldyOldCake I meant to quote @pompomdaisy

So fun that this thread turned from IG unrealistic portrayal of life (an undenial phenomenon) to an opportunity for people to let everyone know how skinny they were post-birth. Mumsnet gonna Mumsnet.

Why is it that only the bad parts of motherhood are ever described as ‘realistic’, even though most of us actively choose to have our children? You’d swear it was community service the way some people go on on here.

I snapped back after each of my 3 pregnancies, you'd never tell I'd been pregnant after about a week or so. Not everyone gains 4 stone and looks like a whale, in fact the whole post baby body worry actually caused me a lot of stress in my first pregnancy as I thought I'd be left with huge stretch marks and weight I'd never shift. That wasn't my reality thankfully, so I welcome seeing mum's snap back. As for going out, it's personal choice isn't it, I breastfed so didn't pack them off early on but if a mother wants to and has support at home to do that why on earth not? You don't turn into a overweight hermit just because you have a baby, life goes on. Why should she sit at home wearing big knickers eating ice cream just because you did?

Wow some of you are really fucking horrible bitches.

When your whole career and income rely on you to look and be a certain way, you dont have a huge lot of choice tbh.

What, should they be overeating, not washing their hair and covered in baby sick 24/7 so you don't feel so shit about yourselves?

I gave birth and was thinner than before i conceived, had an immaculate home as i actually enjoyed pottering about cleaning a lot and took pride in my appearance as i always had done. Unrealistic? No.

I can’t believe that Stacey Dooley is rich enough to have half of that? I think lots of instagram famous people don’t really have loads and loads of money to employ all sorts of people

Also, I am totally over seeing people giving “honest” accounts of motherhood. I really don’t want to see photos of someone else’s vomit and poo thanks

This. I’ve had 4 children, I’ve always had quite small bumps and always gone back to my normal size quite soon after. I have a photo 8 days after DC3 of me back in my high waisted size 10 jeans.
Why does every mum have to be stuck in pjs, can’t shower, can’t eat, can’t get dressed, can’t function for her to be a role model?
You say thats realistic and honest, but for me it isn’t.

@ShirleyPhallus

I have no idea how much money she has but she is definitely more than instagram famous.

She works on the telly a lot. She’s not really an ‘Instagram famous’ person.

Why do they have to be “good” realistic role models ? How is one persons version of motherhood realistic???

Absolutely this!!

I definitely held on to my pregnancy weight, but with my first, I was back to going out for dinner, walks, seeing friends etc within a few days of my c section.

I'd had a rubbish pregnancy and felt GREAT. I had make up on, straightened hair, and felt totally 'together'. We shared the nights so I wasn't tired, and slept substantially more than in pregnancy.

I didn't just survive newborn with my first, I thrived in a way I didn't know I could.

Second child was much the same, though less, mostly due to the toddler. The second time I was back doing some work within a month of birth, and hosting friends for dinner within the first week. I remember on day 3, hands free pumping whilst also straightening my hair, so we could go for brunch 🤷‍♀️

A few years on, the monkeys don't sleep, and I'm now an exhausted, make up free mess! I saved my 'jogging bottoms and hair scraped back' stage for toddlerhood. I didnt escape it, just delayed it 🤣

Point being, we all experience motherhood differently, and shouldn't be shaming other women, whether they find it easier or more difficult.

My pregnancies were awful, but I don't go around saying it's unrealistic if someone has a good one. Good for them!

And good for Stacey Dooley too!

Perhaps it's that bloke who used to put the toothpaste on the the Prince Charles's toothbrush?

Didn't he get the sack?