About not moving on the train?

[TrainSitu]

I’ve recently had shoulder surgery but I am now out of a sling so I guess I don’t look injured. I’m sat at a table seat on the train to get back to my work area after visiting my dad.

I’ve got my backpack on the table and my big bag was put up on the top by a lovely man who offered to put it up. We get to the next station and it’s absolutely heaving and a mother with 3 kids gets on. Everyone files into seats and someone sits opposite me. She then approaches and asks if the other 2 seats are reserved. I said no and she could have them and sat the kids down. She then looks and me and say says “I’ve got 3 children who need a seat please can they have yours” I said no I’ve recently had shoulder surgery and still recovering so standing on a packed train would be too painful. She then continually said “ I have 3 kids though”

At this point I said “I’m not particularly bothered by the amount of kids you have but I will be staying in this seat as I need it too if you have any issues please go speak to the train conductor” The look she gave me could kill!

So AIBU for not moving? The original guy who put my bag in the overhead rack ended up telling her to leave me alone as she kept repeating about her 3 kids. I feel like a cow bag but a justified one!

NC for this so it can’t be linked to any previous threads.

[LondonJax]

If my mum was in a similar position when she took us three out, assuming there were two seats and she wanted us to be safer, I would sit down (aged 10) with my four year old sister on my lap and my eight year old sister on the other seat. A ten year old is more than capable of having another kid on their lap.

My mates and I used to sit on each others laps on crowded buses when we were teenagers and our high heeled feet hurt!

Some people are weird.

[seratoninmoonbeams]

Omg CFery at its finest. You are definitely not BU.

[Womencanlift]

@Reugny

She deleted the video just before it got picked up by the papers. 😂

Oh really? I heard about it when they were debating it on Loose Women 😂

[Womencanlift]

If you are going to slate another woman’s appearance then do it on the appropriate thread and not one about trains 🙄 or better still head over to Tattle

[Reugny]

@LondonJax

If my mum was in a similar position when she took us three out, assuming there were two seats and she wanted us to be safer, I would sit down (aged 10) with my four year old sister on my lap and my eight year old sister on the other seat. A ten year old is more than capable of having another kid on their lap.

My mates and I used to sit on each others laps on crowded buses when we were teenagers and our high heeled feet hurt!

Some people are weird.

Don't be ridiculous "precious" children need their own seats now!

😂

[DangerNoodles]

No. You put them on your lap. That’s what my parents did. Have all the dc you like but in that scenario you should be the adult standing up if you want your dc to have a seat.

When my two were younger we would take up 2 seats, smallest on my lap, biggest on his own seat. On crowded buses someone would always stand to let the smallest sit down, we never even had to ask. I have never seen a very young child left standing and I would think it a bit weird if a mother chucked thier child off a seat so that I could sit down, most mums (rightly) put thier child's safety before an adult's comfort. I don't live anywhere near London though. A moving vehicle isn't a fair comparison with a little balance bike.

But the kids in the OP were 10 so between them they could have managed to all sit down in the 2 seats they had. I was just commenting on a few posters saying that they would make thier 4 year olds stand which to me is daft.

[TerrysNeapolitan]

World gone mad. What exactly is wrong with people now? She sounds a great example to three children.

[StressedToTheMaxxx]

What on earth has happened in society that adults are expected to stand and give their seats to children?

[Reugny]

@Womencanlift

Oh really? I heard about it when they were debating it on Loose Women 😂

Yeah I read the story and it ended with the fact that the video had been taken down. The rags I read it in made a point of sharing some of the comments.

Some commenters had "kindly" shared the bylaws to explain her child wasn't in a category that made him entitled to a seat.

The main moral is don't f*#@ with Londoners about public transport rules.

[ComfortablyDazed]

@WombatChocolate

Why didn’t she put she 3 kids in the 3 seats and stand herself?

There were only two seats - there was a man in the 4th seat, who eventually moved, allowing the three kids to sit next to the OP. Mum sat elsewhere.

[Reugny]

@DangerNoodles

No. You put them on your lap. That’s what my parents did. Have all the dc you like but in that scenario you should be the adult standing up if you want your dc to have a seat.

When my two were younger we would take up 2 seats, smallest on my lap, biggest on his own seat. On crowded buses someone would always stand to let the smallest sit down, we never even had to ask. I have never seen a very young child left standing and I would think it a bit weird if a mother chucked thier child off a seat so that I could sit down, most mums (rightly) put thier child's safety before an adult's comfort. I don't live anywhere near London though. A moving vehicle isn't a fair comparison with a little balance bike.

But the kids in the OP were 10 so between them they could have managed to all sit down in the 2 seats they had. I was just commenting on a few posters saying that they would make thier 4 year olds stand which to me is daft.

I'm talking about push bikes with pedals and no stabilisers.

Anyway trains and tubes are fairly smooth rides compared to a bus. The drivers don't have to slam on their brakes because a car decides to just do a U-turn in front of them or someone runs across the road then claims the bus driver tried to run them over.

(Yeah I know you are quoting someone else but I mentioned bikes and balance.)

[Againstmachine]

Yep I'm laughing at people saying children need to be seated in case the train brakes suddenly. Which literally rarely happens

[ClairDeLaLune]

I don’t even know why you started a thread about this OP, you are a zillion percent NBU! I can’t believe the 1% who say you are, but there’s always some contrary individuals on here. Hope you’re back to full fitness soon.

[ClairDeLaLune]

And this is relevant how @Robynxoxo ?

[DangerNoodles]

It rarely happens but it does happen, think how often people sadly jump onto the line. I just couldn't imagine sitting down while a tiny kid has people at least twice thier size squeezing past them with bags etc. But feel free to make your kid stand if it makes you feel better.

[Cosyblankets]

If the three kids are too young to stand then they're small enough to share 2 seats between the three of them and the mother can stand.

[ancientgran]

@Cosyblankets

If the three kids are too young to stand then they're small enough to share 2 seats between the three of them and the mother can stand.

The kids were sitting opposite each other not next to each other so it would have to be two on one seat which might not be fair to the person sitting next to them.

[ancientgran]

@Againstmachine

Yep I'm laughing at people saying children need to be seated in case the train brakes suddenly. Which literally rarely happens

Shall I stop strapping my GC into their car seats when I'm driving? I've been driving for 50 years and never been involved in an accident so they should be OK shouldn't they?

[Grumpybutfunny]

@PandasAreUseless

I'd never give up my seat for a child, and I don't have any injuries.
A pregnant woman? Yes. An elderly person unstable on their feet? Yes. But never a child.
And I'd try to avoid doing it at all if I'd had a long day at work!

Interesting I would give up my seat for all of the above but if only one seat was left I would give it to the child. The baby is safely in a bubble of water, the elderly have all day to wait for a quieter train where as the child is at greater risk of injury of the train breaks suddenly or people keep pushing. I would also be tempted to say to one of the kids sit on the end of the table and hold on as that seems safer than standing. The logistic of getting kids off a train mean you don't really want to split up a family

[OxanaVorontsova]

@ancientgran

Shall I stop strapping my GC into their car seats when I'm driving? I've been driving for 50 years and never been involved in an accident so they should be OK shouldn't they?

Don’t be so ridiculous

[20viona]

Good for you for standing your ground!

[Dominoeffecter]

Ouvh, shoulder injuries are very painful. You were right not to be bullied out of your seat.

[Newnamenewme23]

@TrainSitu

Haha spot on! He offered his seat up and let the kids sit down. She’s now about 5 rows behind me but thankfully can’t see her 😂

Luckily her children don’t seem to have picked her manners as they are very lovely lads.

So basically she wanted to sit all her kids together so she could sit elsewhere and get some peace 😂

[ancientgran]

@Rummykitten

From National Rail: “Children under 5 years of age travel for free on most journeys but check with your train company to make sure. Please note, children under 5 who are travelling without a ticket may only occupy a seat that is not required by a fare-paying passenger.”

I agree that younger children could be injured if they lose their balance but they should be sitting on the lap of the adult they are travelling with. If the under 5s outnumber the parents / guardians they are travelling with (or if the parent has a strong preference for the child to have a seat), National Rail states that a child ticket with reserved seat can be purchased for 50% of the adult fare.

The person I was quoting had 3 under 6, she couldn't have them all on her lap could she, and the OP was on a train that didn't have reserved seats, I was on one yesterday that didn't have reserved seats. I'm 70 and I'd stand rather than see 3 children under 6 standing and I don't need rules and regulations to tell me that those children are at risk and I'm much safer standing than they are.