Starting to look pretty shit

[givemeenergyplease]

Me, I am.

I’m 45, have a 5 year old and just recently I’ve started to get to the stage where I look not great and nothing helps. For example, before I could slap some tinted moisturiser on, mascara etc and look ok and quite presentable…recently, I have such puffy under eyes (no idea why 🤷🏻‍♀️) my skin is so dry…I even now use the big blue Nivea tin at night and it’s the only time my skin feels nice. My hair is dry and without that shine or gloss..used to like my long, dark hair. Now when I put even a light foundation on it almost looks worse and highlights any lines/creases. I want to feel and look good with a glow, what can I do? I know I don’t drink enough water, so I’m working hard on that (often have kidney stones, think it’s due to not drinking enough) I don’t drink much at all these days, maybe four times a year, if that. I haven’t smoked for years. I don’t work out as find it hard to find the time, take the dog for walks most days though, but I know that’s not enough. I live in a sunny place but wear sunglasses and full factor on my face, admittedly not daily, need to get better at this and not just do it when sunbathing.
Any help/tips? Anyone been the same and turned it around?
I realise it could be peri menopause, although don’t really have any of the other symptoms..always tired, but put that down the having a v active child!

Watching with interest as I’m 46 and every time I look in the mirror I look older, fatter, dowdier and more unwell

Cut out sugar to lose the puffiness.

I dealt with this by not giving a single shit, it's very liberating. Natural aging is nothing you need to hide or worry yourself about.

I think they key is to change what you use - I don't wear make up daily but if I'm out I steer well clear of canceler, powder and anything matt - lots of light stuff

Hair - I used one aimed at older hair and I've gone lighter

Face cream - I use one aimed at older skin - with vit C

I'm 52 - I have also had botox but that's personal choice

However I bet you don't look half as bad as you think you do

Just turn a blind eye, it's not about how you look, it's about how you feel.

Use a hair mask after conditioning.
Take vitamins for hair and nails and separate vitamin D on top of that
Can you find time just to do a 10 minute run just twice a week... perhaps instead of walking the dog, run with the dog? The endorphins that you get for getting out of breath just for a little is great!!

I'm with @Oysterbabe here - I'll be 55 on Tuesday, am fully menopausal and give not a single shit. I wear what I want, I like to stand out and the other day on the Tube a guy came up to me and said I had style. Don't be afraid of your age.

I'm all for the 'embrace yourself as you are' but if you do want to get some practical tips the Style&Beauty board would be better to post on.

Well clearly the poster does care about her appearance like most of us do to a lesser or greater extent

Start with skin care. What are your main concerns? Age? Dryness? Oily? Dull?

Haircare. I swear by Olaplex range. What's your hair like?

Make up. Try and stay away from powder blush, use tint or cream. Blend your make up upwards. Concealer dot it at the end of eye and blend up and out. Blush blend upwards. Key is to blend up as it gives illusion an your face won't sag.

What's your face shape? Can tell you how to contour then.

Mac do something called strobe cream in different colours makes you glow. Put it on under make-up or after moisteriser on its own. If under make up be careful adding anymore glowy stuff as the cream is very glitzy.

It sounds like you have to change your skin and hair care - it’s very common for skin and hair to go really dry in peri-menopause. As far as I know by 45 everyone is peri-menopausal really. I would go over to style and beauty and ask there or just do some googling,

Hyaluronic acid - hydration. Retinol - ageing.
Niamincide oil

You can easily improve your skin with a few additions:

Drink Water! Lots of it. 2L a day. Aim for 8 different fruits and veg per day too.

Don't cleanse in the morning, a little splash of water or miscellar water. Then hyaluronic acid, vit c , moisturiser and then SPF 30.
In the evening, double cleanse, hyaluronic acid, retinol and night cream.

The minute I learned that 80% of aging is linked to sun exposure, I took wearing SPF and my skin routine seriously.

I also think a trip to the hair dressers can take years off of you. Sure they'd give you some great tips.

You can still grow old gracefully whilst taking care of yourself. If you feel good, confident and beautiful, it shins out of your face anyway 🥰

Intermittent fasting. This triggers your cells to self clean and renew. Look it up.

Give up sugar and eat less carbs.

Get enough sleep.

Light Botox for forehead and 11 lines. You’ll never look back.

@Oysterbabe Has the only perfect solution. You will be amazed at how cheap, time saving and effective it is.

I think you have to accept your getting older -and hence will look older . I’m 50 . I’ve changed my moisturiser , exercise more , have my hair shorter and try and get enough sleep . I’m peri though and a lot of things are thrown by that . I don’t spend much time looking in the mirror .. life’s for living and I still have lots I want to do with it

It’s great that many PPs are fully embracing ageing and not making big adjustments, however, the OP isn’t ready to embrace it.

OP, drinking much more water and reducing sugar intake will make a big difference as will vitamins/supplements. You’ll notice a difference in a few weeks.

Try ditching the foundation. My skin is perfectly clear at 41 so why cover it up like I did when I was an acne ridden teen? I occasionally use a radiance primer that's quite glowy and a tiny touch of bronzer. I do find anything more than that clings to the bits you don't want it to.

Sleep helps, water helps, exercise helps, eating well helps, good skincare helps, a trip to the hairdresser helps, retinol helps, Botox helps...

But, they only help so much. Mid 40s is where all the ageing you avoided before inescapably lands on your face. And body. And hair. I am going through it too, and I hate it more than I thought I would considering I've never valued my (extremely average) looks much.

I might get some HRT purely to perk my face up.

Intermittent fasting can affect womens hormones. I'm not sure if that is good or bad for women in their 40s but definitely keep that in mind OP.

There was a recent study which said it didn't affect hormones in pre and post menopausal women but they specifically excluded peri menopausal women from the study.

This is what I need help on, how and where do I fit 8 veg in to my daily diet, my veg is always really boring just goes on the side with my meat etc.

Another one for intermittent fasting, somehow it gives your face a massive glow all on its own. And it’s good for saggy skin too.

@Redruby2020

What do you have for breakfast? Try greek yoghurt with some frozen mixed forest fruits? Or cut up some apple, orange, grapes (whatever you have) and add it in. You could also add a bit of granola in, they have nuts or seeds in them too which count as plant foods.

Have a banana as a snack in the am or pm.

If you have chocolate or something sweet for dessert, add in some fruit. Raspberries or blueberries.

Think what can I add in, rather than what can I take away ☺️

Take collagen supplements, it’s good for your hair skin and nails. I’m older than you and they work for me. Also drink green tea. That’s really good for skin and hair too