Starting to look pretty shit

[givemeenergyplease]

Me, I am.

I’m 45, have a 5 year old and just recently I’ve started to get to the stage where I look not great and nothing helps. For example, before I could slap some tinted moisturiser on, mascara etc and look ok and quite presentable…recently, I have such puffy under eyes (no idea why 🤷🏻‍♀️) my skin is so dry…I even now use the big blue Nivea tin at night and it’s the only time my skin feels nice. My hair is dry and without that shine or gloss..used to like my long, dark hair. Now when I put even a light foundation on it almost looks worse and highlights any lines/creases. I want to feel and look good with a glow, what can I do? I know I don’t drink enough water, so I’m working hard on that (often have kidney stones, think it’s due to not drinking enough) I don’t drink much at all these days, maybe four times a year, if that. I haven’t smoked for years. I don’t work out as find it hard to find the time, take the dog for walks most days though, but I know that’s not enough. I live in a sunny place but wear sunglasses and full factor on my face, admittedly not daily, need to get better at this and not just do it when sunbathing.
Any help/tips? Anyone been the same and turned it around?
I realise it could be peri menopause, although don’t really have any of the other symptoms..always tired, but put that down the having a v active child!

I had puffy eyes for ages until I realised it was an allergic reaction to my eye makeup remover.

@SnoogyWoo - 6 eggs a DAY? That's quite a habit you've got there.

Isotretinoin plus spf 50. It doesn’t stop skin aging but it slows it down a good bit.

You’ve said it yourself, you know you don’t drink enough water to the point it effects your health. Keeping hydrated is extremely important for our health inside and out. Also if you don’t always remember to put sunscreen on use a moisturiser that has spf in it.

Nivea blue is great, if this works at night why don’t you try the Nivea soft during the day. I love Nivea but at 47 it’s not doing what my skin needs. I’ve found my skin & hair goes through phases so I have to change things up every so often. I do stick to the same brands though, Nivea & L’Oréal, I’ve tried other things in the past but always come back to these.

In the past I very rarely wore makeup or like you could get away with a bit of tinted moisturiser. These days I find myself wearing makeup more often and more of it, as in I use primer, I contour & use a highlighter. I also use mascara something I never ever did when I was young. The primer definitely helps where my wrinkles are concerned.

I always make sure as soon as I’m home it all comes off with gentle makeup remover and slather my face in cream, then reapply before bed.

As for your hair definitely recommend hair masks and investing in a decent shampoo conditioner until you feel better. But make sure you find one that suites your hair before spending the money on it.

This made me hoot with laughter, it describes me to a tee.

I genuinely never thought I would be bothered about aging, but I've realised that at 45 I could have another 45 years left in me. If the rate of decline continues at the pace it is then my elderly years will be spent frightening small children and avoiding mirrors. The problem is everything is so much harder than it was even 5 years ago 🙄

Coconut oil warmed up and left on your hair overnight works wonders for dry and dull hair. But put a towel over your pillow. Or just leave it in for 2 to 3 hours.

I'm a bit surprised you have kidney stones so often.
You are a bit old to have a first child with no help. No wonder you're feeling a bit old and knackered.
Good luck with it all. Try and get in touch with your local health visitor and they can help you x

Get fat, it naturally fills the lines in your face.

Yes, I feel exactly like this now (I’m 47) haven’t felt like this massively before but now I just look really quite old. I’m not sure what the answer is. I use gradual tanning drops - I think a very, very light fake tan is quite helpful as it kind of evens out my skin tone somehow. Other than that, I’m still trying to find the holy grail of foundation/cc cream but haven’t found it yet, many of them just accentuate my wrinkles. My hair is frazzled looking. I wish I didn’t care (like pps have suggested) but I do, as shallow as that is. No answers but I totally sympathise.

Exercise, Botox and seeing the hairdresser more often than you used to.

Why do you care? It's perfectly appropriate for you to lose your looks at this age. You've had a good innings and can now focus on other aspects of yourself. (I'm the same age)

I like this suggestion.

As a Christian, it is kind of a sin to do fillers etc. As we're not supposed to care about things like that, and getting older should be something that gains respect.

But I want to pull one day.

Think about getting your thyroid checked. It can cause skin dryness, weight gain, tiredness and hair breakage.

There is an interesting article in the Times today by Anna Murphy, about how she is the only fashion writer without Botox. I think she looks great without it, , assuming she is telling the truth ( but then I think that of everyone). www.thetimes.co.uk/article/cosmetic-tweakments-how-fashion-fell-for-fillers-and-why-i-ll-never-freeze-my-face-bvj9n92df

I recently learned that the older friends in my group who all look great all get botox. I’m probably going to copy to be honest.

The blue Nivea cream gave me milia all around my eyes. Really the only thing that will fix baggy/puffy under eyes dye to aging is a lower blepharoplasty. There are some laser treatments available, but they won't make as much of a difference. I had an upper bleph and the recovery was pretty minimal and the scars aren't visible at all.

Where in the bible does it forbid fillers? Didn't realise they were available back in the olden days

Totally agree. I left work 15 years ago to have DTs, and everything collapsed! I had an early menopause so donor conceived children quite late in life. Looked and felt fine up until having them, and ever since things have drooped and sagged....

I have never been sure how much is due to having children, how much due to the menopause, and how much due to leaving a job where I probably did 30,000 steps every day and ever since have plodded about doing far less. Over the last 15 years my face has sagged, my skin has wrinkled, I've developed jowls, and I now use an e-bike to keep up with the rest of the family....

Since the menopause I can't really wear make up as my eyelashes are now really short so mascara is pointless, my eyelids are too droopy for eyeshadow, my lips are thin so lipstick seems a waste of time, and my eyebrows have thinned to nothing.....

But can I be bothered to care - not really. I'd like to be fitter, and am working on that - but aging is just a thing. Enjoy what you have, and grow old disgracefully......

Anyone got a sharetoken for the Times article?

For the dry skin I'd look into gentle a gentle Cleanser, a good hydrating serum, maybe a peptide serum for anti aging purposes if that's your thing and then rely on the Nivea to keep your skin moisturised.

This is not answering your question but frequent kidney stones can be a symptom of hyperparathyroidism. As is tiredness/fatigue. It’s a little known condition. You could ask your GP to check your calcium levels.

Liquid collagen or a good powder if not available.

@ruthgordon123 What do you mean?

@ZeldaWillTellYourFortune

What in earth is a "wattle" 😫