To walk away from my MIL when she does this

[Fluttershyy]

So my MIL is a bit of an odd one and doesn’t take no for an answer, as in she just goes on and on and on and on and only tends to get the point when someone looses their rag with her (DH).

2 things this week that she just gone on and on and on about, the most trivial is the one I’ll share here because I just don’t get why she does it

made cheesy veg muffins for my kids (toddler and pre schooler so young). They came out well if I say so myself and were a low effort high yield meal that will do a few lunches and snacks. Great. MIL was over at lunch offered her some, she asked what they were, told her (simple concept right). Then eating them, it was like she was eating rotten fruit, the face on her, she even spat it in the bin and then asked what was in it, explained, then she spent literally the next 5-10 mins disagreeing with me that their primary ingredient was potato, it wasn’t I made them, but it was her hill to die on, she wouldn’t let it go and was insistent they had potatoes in. She doesn’t have a potato allergy or anything she was just insistent they were potato based. In the end I had to say sure whatever walk away. Cue a few hrs later, she brings up the fact I lied that the muffins had potatoes in and proceeded to lecture me how I must have prepped the pots incorrectly and how I must do it instead. I ended up just saying they didn’t have potatoes in and walk away (probably huffily).

what the f is up with that firstly?

Walking away is the best thing to do right, she won’t back down otherwise

I think you can help it. It's just good manners not to show your disgust, even if something is truly revolting. You're just choosing to behave badly.

I missed the bit about you having a DP. He must be one patient man (unless he's equally rude).

@Fluttershyy Walking away from your MIL is the best response.

@bussteward

I like you!!

@Fluttershyy it's probably the safest option. I'd be all 'Well, I made them, but whatever'

pre enough coffee ' for fuck sake, I made them, they don't have bloody potato in them! The kids like them, I like them, DH likes them. If you don't like them, don't eat them. It's not complicated'

we need to hear more.... please!!

@Keyansier oh so you're on of them. Create an argument and then feign innocence and offensive when someone calls you on the fact you're behaving like a knob.

Everyone please ignore Keyansier. He's constantly on threads being deliberately goady.

I’d just laugh at her. “You’re sure they’ve got potato in? The egg muffins I made without potato? Brilliant. Okay then. Maybe some mash has got into the water supply. Better watch out on my next hair wash!”

@Fluttershyy I assume you probably didn’t use salt and that’s why mil didn’t like the muffins. It’s amazing how salt improves flavour.
She’s still rude though and a bit odd to keep going on.

Could you put the ball back in her court in a way?

"MIL. The only way you could possibly think you know better what I made these muffins with than I do is if you've been spying on me. And that's just weirder than your obsession with having to be right about something you didn't even witness. So I'm walking away now and shutting the conversation down".

Then every time she said something about her obsession with being right just reply with "what's the weather forecast tomorrow?".

Yes, it is just your perception.

I Think you probably need to work harder on that then Keyansier. I think it's horribly immature and rude. I never let my children do this never mind adults.

That sounds like an odd way to behave. And yes, the best thing is to disengage. It doesn't sound like she's coming from a very rational place, so arguing your point won't help.
Has she always been like that? Arguing about that is so odd, I'd be wondering if she was well.

I had a MIL like this

I think she had an (undiagnosed) social communication disorder

To add, my dad would do a similar thing, insisting food I cooked him tasted of curry, and refusing to believe I hadn't put spices in his cottage pie or curry powder in cake. He had dementia.

You really are the gift that keeps on giving 😂

Rude person. I hope that you don't have to put up with much of her company.
Did you tell your OH about it? If so, what was their response?

"Walking away is the best thing to do right, she won’t back down otherwise"

I think that was a very measured response on your part. My response would have been less so - either a curt "are you calling me a liar then?" or asking her leave.

TBF the mere thought of cheesy veg muffins wants me want to vomit so I don’t blame her for spitting some in the bin.

Waitrose does some incredible ones!

Good to see she’s already been diagnosed with dementia though 🙄

Are you 5?

Were you there?

No, I just have normal taste buds.

😂

How was she being purposely antagonistic? She didn't tell her MIL the muffins had potatoes in. Was she supposed to agree with her MIL when it wasn't true?

I think I would just have her over when dh is there (and promptly leave for an urgent job)