What did she want people to do?

[SkivingSnackboxes]

Recently went to spectate at a sporting event and we got on the tram to get there. It was rammed, we expected it to be rammed. It's a busy event.

The tram was standing room only, and it was busy Ie sardines.

This pregnant woman was standing in the middle of the aisle she wouldn't move further down so there was a huge gap behind her. She didn't look that pregnant tbh, she kept shouting. im pregnant, I need space, you all need to back off, I'm pregnant I need a seat im pregnant I can't be touched
The only people sat down were kids and old people and the families didn't offer her a seat. The guard came down and told her she needed to move down into the gap or get off. She decided to get off and then asked if the trams were going to be busy all day?

She genuinely wanted random strangers to not go to the rugby because she enforced a halo of 'im pregnant and no one can be near me'

Surely if you're that precious about being pregnant you'd get a taxi?

She should’ve been offered a seat. She shouldn’t have got annoyed about people being near or touching her. She’s unreasonable. The other passengers were unreasonable. And no I don’t believe they were ALL unable to offer her a seat because of invisible conditions or ADHD.

I am fairly confident if the pregnant lady had come on here telling her story, alot of people would have told her that just because she is pregnant it doesn't entitle her to a seat.

More rubbish @Barneysma2

Expectant mothers are literally listed on the websites of multiple public transport providers as a group of people that priority seats are intended for.

Yes, probably I would offer a pregnant lady a seat as I would like to think of myself as a nice person. However, my original point wasnt about saying people should be offering her a seat, it was about, in general, how I find people on Mumsnet to be fickle with what they are saying. Some posters I have noticed will disagree with the OP no matter what and back the other person up in the narrative but if the other person was to come on here and post the same story from their perspective then some of them same posters would disagree with that person as well. It seems alot of of posters on mumsnet just like generally disagreeing with the OP no matter what.

😂😂😂
The most batshit post on the whole thread.
Blind, deaf, unable to use all your limbs and you still wouldn’t have needed a seat because it was down to being pregnant.
Here you go 🏅

No doubt it won’t be long before ‘that boy mum’ becomes ‘that MIL’ with a million posts written about her.
God help the DILs.

You're welcome 😁

Yes, but 🤷‍♀️ there’s a lot of daft OP’s out there! 😂

So you would offer her a seat because you think of yourself as a nice person (so we can glean from this that you think offering a pregnant woman a seat on public transport is a good thing to do), but everyone else who has pretty much said the same thing is lying because we all hate the OP. Right.

🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

And? You dont need to send this to me, I am not saying she shouldnt have been offered a seat. I am just saying that if the pregnant lady had come on here telling her side of the story some posters would have said that just because she was pregnant doesn't entitle her to a seat. Do you not think some posters would have said that? Out of all the members that are on here? I have literally seen it in previous threads before. Like I said, I am not saying she didnt deserve a seat I am talking about other posters on Mumsnet. But hey, difference of opinion is all good @Calphurnia88 and I would also like to wish you a very good day ahead 😊

I'm saying that you're effectively trying to checkmate the majority opinion on this thread (which isn't just an opinion when it's reflective of public transport policy) by saying 'Oh it's Mumsnet so obviously everyone disagrees with OP, if it was reversed then they'd say the opposite.'

And now you're trying to do the same thing by telling everyone who disagrees with you to have a good day.

Are you usually this transparent? 😅

Odd isn’t it

You got that spot on yes , I had a brain tumour prior to pregnancy which left me with a debilitating life long condition pregnancy made the intracranial pressure in my skull too high which results in the left side of my body shutting down due to pressure on nerves etc , and at not one point did I feel like the need to act like the first poorly pregnant person In the world because I wasn’t, so I still stand by my first comment she was being a drama queen

As I’ve said already I had a brain tumour prior to pregnancy which left me with a life long condition where I loose the ability down my left side including my sight and hearing if the pressure in my skull is too high, it’s not that hard to understand. After pregnancy I had brain surgery and a shunt fitted to divert the build up , And I still stand by my comments she was just thinking she was the first pregnant woman to use public transport. My only down fall in this convo is that I’ve never ever used public transport so no nobody would need to move for me 😌

@Thatboymum

not to put too fine a point on it… but you’re completely daft!!

I would have laughed out loud if I’d heard someone saying this (after I’d give my seat up!)

I’d have laughed too but at you for being the mug that gave up your seat 🙃if the woman came on here saying nobody on the train would give me a seat and I’m pregnant so i stood on the train with an invisible halo around me shouting I’m pregnant don’t come close she would 100% have been slaughtered on here for being entitled and dramatic

Doing something nice for someone just because you can doesn't make you a mug. It makes you a decent person.

Refusing to do something nice for someone even tho doing so would have little to no impact on you but would make a huge difference to them doesn't make you superior just unkind .

The only time I've ever felt like a mug for giving up my seat on public transport was when the recipient of my seat, an older man, stood up again to offer it to an attractive young woman who got on at the next stop. And she accepted.
I don't get why anyone would even question offering a seat to someone else who might need it more. Nobody is the first pregnant/elderly/disabled person to use public transport. Sneering 'What makes them so damn special?' is just a cover for selfishness.

This!

I have always refused seats when offered during pregnancy, however I don’t have to use public transport often so it’s only now and again I’ve been in that position.

However, my most recent pregnancy was absolutely awful. I very nearly passed out while sitting in a chair at the hairdressers, let alone while standing in a crowded tram. My eyesight just went and I became incredibly hot and it wasn’t even warm there! (Only 1 hairdresser so not like it was a busy one with lots of hairdryers on). There was no warning either, just came out of nowhere. Maybe she was feeling fine but then the heat got to her on the tram?

If I have been on public transport and a pregnant lady, parent with a baby, young child or older person came on, I always offer my seat. It’s common decency in my eyes.

You sound really unpleasant.

If you are honest, how do you fare in RL in terms of relationships. Friends? A partner? Work colleagues?

because in my relationship circle, if someone said what you said above In RL as that would be your response to this scenario…. tumbleweed and shared exchanges of “WTF” looks, before moving on and away from you . Pronto

Did the shunt also divert your empathy?

You think someone is being a mug when they’re considerate and kind?

Wow. I think your parents did a number on you.

I had an empathy by pass long before that

She wanted a seat, obviously. Was probably feeling awful. You’ve no idea why she was on the tram or her financial circumstances.

bloody sad that no one offered her a seat. I would.

I had a bit of a bad train experience once.

I was reasonably early on in pregnancy, although must have been beyond 12 weeks, and used to just stand on the 15 minute train journey because I felt fine... until one time I didn't. It was a crowded evening rush hour train, the same one I was in the habit if getting every day. I started to feel very faint and claustrophobic but I was in a vestibule by the door so couldn't even attempt to ask for a seat. I had to crouch down and probably looked like a right dickhead to everyone standing around me. Didn't say anything to anyone and noone actually checked if I was OK until I got off the train (where I thankfully bumped into my neighbour as I was standing trying to shake the dizziness and she walked me home).

I made sure I sat down on the train after that! 🙈

Point is, you don't know why she was in that tram, maybe she really had to get somewhere and she thought it would be ok because she has done that journey without any issue before. Whilst I agree her reaction does sound quite dramatic, neither you nor I know why she was behaving that way so best thing is to just go about your day and forget about it!

Honestly not very well I’m autistic but that’s not the reason I’m rude I deffo choose to be the way I am, I don’t want a relationship like ever so that’s not an issue, I have 3 great friends who are like minded and would probs have said worse than I have here, and I work from home now so thankfully don’t need to Interact with colleagues but when I was office based I hated it. I’ve never ever used public transport it’s too overwhelming so that’s my only downfall here but honestly I have zero empathy like yes I would move for an old person or disabled person without hesitation I’d help them across a road etc but I feel quite resentful about people who choose to get pregnant and then make a huge deal of it like they didn’t know what to expect and the world has to stop for them for 9 months. And that resentment deffo came from getting sick long term and it absolutley has made me a shit person I’d be the first to say that