Stop telling my child your his mama !

[camila21]

So my MIL and FIL keep trying to get my child to call my MIL mama, mother or a similar sounding name. They are originally from a northern country so I am not sure if this is cultural.

It started when my child was 18 months old he would call me Mama and my husband dada. One day I heard my MIL tell my child to call her mother and then on another occasion Mama. When I asked my mother in law not to call her self Mama she said I was mistaken... but I wasnt.

I heard my FIL do the same thing. Until my child shouted at them saying 'you are not my mama!'
Now they want my child to call my MIL a name from their country that strangly sounds like mummy, they said it means grandmother in the country. Should I talk to them or wait till they give up?

Can't you Google to see what the normal grandparent names are in their language? I'm assuming the dad isn't on the scene or surely he would know?

Try talking but your child will get to the stage where they will fight back if you keep telling them it's wrong

Also can you have less to do with them?

Is your DH so from that country? He must know what they are saying? I would get him to talk to them to be honest. Or tell them they are welcome to choose any grandparent type name they like, but not one that will confuse your child!

What are the actual names they are referring to? Surely it's not beyond you to find this out.

Are you sure its not nanna? Very similar sounding to mama?

Which Northern country? My DH is Swedish and the common word for (maternal) Grandmother is Mormor, which does sound more like Mama or Mummy than 'Nan' or 'Gran' does. Paternal Grandmother would be Farmor though.

I did and it either translates as mother because she didnt complete the word or its not their language. Like the name mama and mother isn't used.

I know of someone with Scandinavian heritage who calls their grandmother Ama. Could it be that? Not trying to minimise it, I'd be raging if my mum or mil was trying to get my kids to call them any derivatives of mum.

East Midlands it is very common for grandmothers to be known as Mamar could this be the confusion?

My mum was mama to my children. MIL is nana. I have friends from scotland where grandma was also mama. i was always mummy, now mum.

Sorry not northen its another country.
My husband keeps saying he's managing it but he's being polite because their his parents

My mum is Mama, short for Grandmama. I'm Mother. My dc speaks like something from a Jane Austen novel though

My kids gma is Maa-maa. It's the word for paternal gma. Sounds like mumma...but isn't.....my kids never confuse her with me. It would be considered impolite and disrespectful if we said no and gave her a different name.

My son has always called me Mama from when he was 5 months old and husband dada. Hes been saying it for over a year. Can there be two Mama's?

Get your child to name them and then go with that. Kids will come up with something suitably unique to them (eg. My DC called my parents Gamma (Grandma) and Gangy (Grandad) when he first started talking. 5 years later those names have still stuck x

My kids call my PIL "mami" and "Papi" (grandma and grandpa in their language). It doesnt bothet me because Im not a native English speaker and my kids call me "mama", which is the right word in my mother tongue for mum. However I would be annoyed if they ask them to call my MIL "mama" because that will confuse the kids.

Swedish - mormor

At the time he was 5/6 months and couldn't say mummy so kept saying Mama and at18 months still calls me Mama.

Can't you ask then WHAT it is they want your dc to call them.

If it's mama and dada ask them WHY they want YOUR dc their GRANDCHILD to call then that.

Tell them what your dc will call them if they can't come up with something appropriate in their language.

Are you sure it's not nana and poppa or similar? That's granny and grandad

This is true. My Grandad was 'Gongonk', later shortened to 'Gonk'.

Well she said to me Modther but then I can heat her tell my child to call her mother. If my child calls me she will answer and I've been leaving my child to tell her he means me. But its silly everyone has a name but my child won't call her anything.

I'm pretty sure your dc won't always call you mama anyway.

Not useful comment - One of the Finnish words for Grandma sounds a bit like mummie, whereas the word for mum is äiti so sounds completely different. It's possible that your MIL doesn't realise how insensitive she is been.

More constructively - could you say that because the words mama and mama sound so similar MIL can call herself Mama but your family will call her mama MIL-name to avoid confusion. Your son will probably come up with his own name for her over time and she'll find that even better.

I will give her a choice of grandparent names and ask them to choose one and stick to it.

How has it got to 18 months without this being addressed? It doesn't make sense. Haven't you ever referred to them as a grandparent name in front of dc before? I sorted what each grandparent would be called while still pregnant.