Stop telling my child your his mama !

[camila21]

So my MIL and FIL keep trying to get my child to call my MIL mama, mother or a similar sounding name. They are originally from a northern country so I am not sure if this is cultural.

It started when my child was 18 months old he would call me Mama and my husband dada. One day I heard my MIL tell my child to call her mother and then on another occasion Mama. When I asked my mother in law not to call her self Mama she said I was mistaken... but I wasnt.

I heard my FIL do the same thing. Until my child shouted at them saying 'you are not my mama!'
Now they want my child to call my MIL a name from their country that strangly sounds like mummy, they said it means grandmother in the country. Should I talk to them or wait till they give up?

He can talk and shout in context and say "you're not my mama", firstly you had better tell your 18 month old to stop shouting at his grandmother, even if she does call herself by a name he knows that she is not (bright little man that he is).

Secondly, I do not for one second believe that an 18 month old has the intelligence and capability to be able to have that conversation with his grandmother.

Sorry, just for that whole heap of bullshit you are being totally unreasonable (and appearing a little deranged).

lol I didn't find it interesting that hes talking but it's handy when he want something. It's difficult when parents talk to him and then find out his age. I've had a parents get heated about it. I don't know other languages so he will be the same as other children.

Complete sentence's and correcting his grandma, knowing that she is using the wrong terminology? I an sure with a child that bright, you could just ask him to say

Please grandma, don't ask me to call mama, that is not appropriate.

But do tell him not to shout it at her, that is just rude.

Common in parts of the East Midlands and South Yorkshire to say mom-ar and pop-ar (we spell mommar and poppa) for grandparents.

Why won't you just tell people the country they're from and posters can tell you if it's a translation thing or not?

It's not intelligence I think he's like a parot like adding not to my mama but this isn't about when my child has learnt to talk. If I say my then he says my...try not to get upset about the talking that's not why I posted this.

Thank for the advice some of it really helpful, some of it has become focused too much on child development. The country is Iran

Its Iran

I just don't like the way they have not being open about why they would pick that name.

It Irn but my husband says they don't use mama and papa

Iran is a northern country nowadays? I thought you were talking about Scandinavia. But that's not ever relevant.
In many languages, the words mamie/mummy/mam etc can be mother or grandmother. My DC can navigate perfectly well that I am mama in one language and grandma is also mama in her language, but other grandma is mamie. Honestly no issues.

Google (not always the most reliable) says that Persian for grandmother is mAmAn bozorg, which I'm assuming is a lot for your son to learn so maybe they're trying to get him to say the first part?

Are you intending to stick with Mam or go to Mummy? I think if it's the latter I'd probably be less bothered about it, your son knows who his mum is. I would however want my husband more involved in these discussions than being passive especially if it's upsetting you.

I go by Mam/ mammy (regional thing) and my mother in law constantly called me Mummy until my daughter said Grandma I don't have a mummy. She didn't shout it but was clear that I'm Mammy to her.

Maman Bozorg. Is the formal version of grandmother. It is rarely used. They don't use Mami or mama either for grandma.

It is normal for grandfather to be called Baba however but not for grandmother to be called mama.

However I do know it's becoming popular to call your young grandmother "'madari joon"

My Farsi speaking husband called his grandmother Bebe Joon.

That's what my MIL is now called.

It isn't cultural.

It's true he can't say it yet he say grand in my parents name mumberly like gnma gnda but I know who he's calling for. I do want to respect their culture but mama and papa are not Iran words according to my husband.

It is not cultural for Iranians to do this. Don't let them gaslight you.

I mean he can't say grand

sorry I mean I don't want to disrespect their culture. They are family.

Mama is mother! Even Prince Charles called the Queen Mama!

I wasn't sure if this is them being them or cultural but I don't want to appear difficult either. Gotta keep everyone sweet but don't want to be a doormat.

But if your child can't say mummy they can end up calling you mama/muma. When your child is with you all the time you can't keep correcting. He couldnt say say U or Y which is probably why he said dada and then mama.

Thank you I'm going to write this down. Just as suggestions. She wanted Maman Bozorg but then said it was too formal. Madari sounds easy to say I might mention it. However the moment my son calls me mummy it will be fine because its my preferred name. I just think MIL wants to be called it now. But Madari sounds like a nice alternative to grandmama.

I had one that could talk pretty well at 18 months, he would certainly have been able to correct someone like ops son did

Some do talk early, I'm not sure why people are acting like thet don't 🙄

He can’t say “grand” but he can articulate a full reasoned sentence in context ?

@Tandora and shout it to show that he's annoyed!

Were other mums funny about it too? I only have one child so I didnt realise it was anything. I find it kinda random that mums would focuse on it ...

😅hilarious could you imagine!