Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

On holiday and Annoyed!

348 replies

Mummy322 · 14/02/2023 15:04

First day of holiday today and had an altercation with another guest. I have never had an argument with a stranger before so feeling a little deflated and upset. DH as usual totally dismissed my feelings and told me to just” get over it”. This other guest kept looking over our table disgusted a few times. First I thought my child was being noisy (toddler) so I told him to be quiet which he did, second time he was sucking a slice of lemon which I think is fine as he likes it and she was shouting something in another language with her family and screwing her nose and mouth at my toddler.

I was sitting opposite her on table behind so she was directly in my eyeline. Husband was sitting on the right opposite my son so no one on the seat directly infront of me so I could see her every reaction. I avoided looking at her at this point and just kept interacting with my son. Once we got up to move she was being very obvious by pointing and shouting and her whole family (3 kids and husband) were turning around looking at our table. My DH pretended he didn’t notice this and proceeded walking outside with our son I stayed back to pack his beaker etc. I then asked her if everything okay and if we did something to upset her she started yelling in English now saying it’s bad for the environment to waste food. My son and myself had eaten our food but husband had some left in his plate which she wouldn’t have seen till he got up to leave. I told her it’s not her business and she said I was destroying the planet and should be ashamed! I wish I had asked her what’s worse for the planet having 3 kids or wasting food but I obviously didn’t say it’s not nice. I was really upset and embarrassed as other guests were looking my way.

What would you have done? We have to spend next 6 days here. I’m really annoyed at this woman. It’s a small resort and we can’t go out so I will be bumping into her at every meal time. Only one restaurant here too.

OP posts:
Leirvassbu · 14/02/2023 18:56

Do you have the same tables every evening? I'd ask to be moved if that's the case and explain what happened.
To me it sounds like the food waste thing was just an excuse to cover up racism. If you're saying she couldn't see the wasted food until you stood up and left the table that means that the pointing, shouting and laughing earlier on had nothing to do with food wastage. It's the first thing she could think of to cover up her behaviour.

ColdLittleHeart · 14/02/2023 18:59

How sad that she’s more interested in you and your family than her own. She must be having a shit holiday!

People like this get off on making others feel small. I would totally kill her with kindness though. Smile, say hello every time you pass, show her that she hasn’t got to you. That’ll piss her off 😂

Please don’t let her ruin your holiday, you’ve done absolutely nothing wrong

fetchacloth · 14/02/2023 19:04

I would have said to her 'Dont make your problem mine' and then walked off without another word. I certainly wouldn't feel embarrassed. Then proceed to blank her for the remainder of the week.
I really don't have time or sympathy for people like this.🙄

daffodilday · 14/02/2023 19:04

Bag up any spare food and leave it on her table for her.

Always4Brenner · 14/02/2023 19:06

Load of leftovers next then drop on her table saying ‘here you go you can see it’s not wasted then’

Forfrigz · 14/02/2023 19:07

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Itgoesalittlesomethinglikethis · 14/02/2023 19:15

Don't let it spoil your holiday.
This is the reason I want to learn fuck off in every language.
Enjoy your holiday x

Sussexlass84 · 14/02/2023 19:19

OP this is awful - you don't deserve to treated like that. Second other posters, and suggest you speak with the management at the hotel.

Leirvassbu · 14/02/2023 19:30

Verpiss Dich is German for piss off. Try that.
Then try various other European languages until you get a reaction.

grumpycow1 · 14/02/2023 19:38

AGoldenNarwhal · 14/02/2023 15:59

I would play this differently, especially given the possible racism aspect. I would report her to the hotel management and ask them to let her know that you'll be reporting her for harassment if she so much as looks in your direction again. You deserve a drama-free holiday.

This! Definitely point her out to the hotel management (in front of her) and tell them you feel intimidated and harassed. Can they offer you a table far away from wherever they are sitting.

Isithotinhere · 14/02/2023 19:43

Can you just imagine how embarrassed her kids are? She is totally crazy, definitely talk to manager if she starts again.

IWonderWhyIBother · 14/02/2023 19:45

FlissyPaps · 14/02/2023 18:46

what a stupid comment 🙄

In some countries it’s advised you stay in the holiday resort/complex due to some areas being dangerous or risky for tourists.

Has the OP said where they are? Do we know that’s why they can’t go out?

Sounds fab, home to airport, airport to hotel, a week stuck in the hotel, hotel to airport, airport to home.

How was your holiday, great we ate in the one restaurant three times a day for a week avoiding another guest.
What was the country like? Dunno

Mammajay · 14/02/2023 19:49

Oh please don't avoid anywhere because of your race. Be a proud person (British?). There are nasty people everywhere but most people are nice so don't let the nasties win. I hate confrontation so I would just ignore her.

thetwotattoos · 14/02/2023 20:01

A stiff drink and/or stiff upper lip and you'll be fine. She's a twat, possibly a racist twat. Do not let her get to you and enjoy your holiday.

Yesmate · 14/02/2023 20:11

YesitsBess · 14/02/2023 15:07

Flick peas at her during meal times. Constantly.

Train toddler to do same.

There is no engagement with people like this so I'm afraid it's pea war. 😎

I love this 😂

WinterDeWinter · 14/02/2023 20:52

FlissyPaps · 14/02/2023 18:46

what a stupid comment 🙄

In some countries it’s advised you stay in the holiday resort/complex due to some areas being dangerous or risky for tourists.

And... that is worth some thought, isn't it? If you're going to places where the citizens are so desperate that you need security guards and must stay within your 'could be anywhere luxury compound'... maybe there's an ethical decision to be made?

Dymaxion · 14/02/2023 21:09

Can you just imagine how embarrassed her kids are?

Wishing the ground would swallow them up and wondering why they aren't like normal families, with nice Mothers who don't abuse random strangers ?

Newmumatlast · 14/02/2023 21:56

Mummy322 · 14/02/2023 15:11

Do I need to feel embarrassed? Would you have left it as my DH is saying or would you have asked her what was wrong like I did?

Don't let this get to you. Id have done what you did. Given the woman's issue with you is illogical it wouldn't surprise me if it were due to your race and shes finding some other issue to be annoyed at to con herself into thinking shes not racist. Just eat what you like and if you have any leftovers next time feel free to offer them to her given shes so pressed

chronictonic · 14/02/2023 22:09

ClimbingRoseBush · 14/02/2023 15:23

She’s either racist or unstable. Ask to be sat well away from her when you go into the restaurant and if she speaks to you again complain to management.

This.
Keep your distance, rise above it, and if she continues to make you feel uncomfortable, complain.

Please don't let her ruin your holiday.

Remember, there's a chance that actually, on reflection, she is the one now feeling embarrassed and uncomfortable.

noodlezoodle · 14/02/2023 22:30

If she does it again, get a huge plate of chips, and eat half of each chip and discard the other half while maintaining constant eye contact with her.

Sorry OP, it's her, not you.

tinatea · 14/02/2023 22:48

She sounds like a racist scumbag.
Honestly it's not fair that she's trying to ruin your holiday.
How many other people are around her leaving stuff behind on their plates? Not just you I'd imagine?

Some people are just plain weird!

Inca22 · 14/02/2023 22:50

It's easy for others to say "ignore it" and "don't let it upset you" but I know that's hard to do - especially when these things happen in front of your children. I spent most of my life ignoring these exact scenarios - and now I give as good as I get. Often people don't expect to respond because they want to see you cower and know your place.

HOWEVER I do hope you and your family have a wonderful holiday and that stupid lady gets a good talking to by her family and the resort!

Mummy322 · 15/02/2023 01:38

Thank you all. Apologies I haven’t had a chance to respond to questions. No it’s not all inclusive, I’m not sure about breakfast as we haven’t had yet but lunch and dinner you either pay for buffet or order off a set menu and pay that way which is more expensive. The Buffett we had for lunch was very cheap. Dinner we decided to get from the menu so we’re seated in a different part of the restarant. We didn’t see her, I really wish I hadn’t been so polite about it and actually been a but aggressive when asking her if everything was okay. I know if same happens I will react exactly same way. Reflecting back on it I’m proud I did question her rather than walk away.

OP posts:
keeprunning55 · 15/02/2023 03:56

Who on earth looks at other peoples food on their plate to see what is left behind?

If it happens again, let the staff know. It sounds completely mad.

Try to enjoy your holiday and ignore the woman. It’s her problem.

Downunderduchess · 15/02/2023 05:25

IsItBedtimeYetNope · 14/02/2023 15:06

I'd just murmur "I'm so embarrassed for you" in her direction if she gets like that again, and try to avoid her as much as possible.

I spend too much time on Insta, I just tried to double tap this comment! It’s a good response.

Swipe left for the next trending thread