On holiday and Annoyed!

[Mummy322]

First day of holiday today and had an altercation with another guest. I have never had an argument with a stranger before so feeling a little deflated and upset. DH as usual totally dismissed my feelings and told me to just” get over it”. This other guest kept looking over our table disgusted a few times. First I thought my child was being noisy (toddler) so I told him to be quiet which he did, second time he was sucking a slice of lemon which I think is fine as he likes it and she was shouting something in another language with her family and screwing her nose and mouth at my toddler.

I was sitting opposite her on table behind so she was directly in my eyeline. Husband was sitting on the right opposite my son so no one on the seat directly infront of me so I could see her every reaction. I avoided looking at her at this point and just kept interacting with my son. Once we got up to move she was being very obvious by pointing and shouting and her whole family (3 kids and husband) were turning around looking at our table. My DH pretended he didn’t notice this and proceeded walking outside with our son I stayed back to pack his beaker etc. I then asked her if everything okay and if we did something to upset her she started yelling in English now saying it’s bad for the environment to waste food. My son and myself had eaten our food but husband had some left in his plate which she wouldn’t have seen till he got up to leave. I told her it’s not her business and she said I was destroying the planet and should be ashamed! I wish I had asked her what’s worse for the planet having 3 kids or wasting food but I obviously didn’t say it’s not nice. I was really upset and embarrassed as other guests were looking my way.

What would you have done? We have to spend next 6 days here. I’m really annoyed at this woman. It’s a small resort and we can’t go out so I will be bumping into her at every meal time. Only one restaurant here too.

You have done nothing wrong and whatever the reasons behind her very odd behaviour it isn’t anything you need to concern yourself with. If she persists speak to the management but otherwise just forget it and enjoy the holiday.

Hi @Mummy322 I feel for you. This happened to us on holiday few years only people of colour on resort. And an older man kept just looking and shaking his head in disgust. My toddler at the time was to be honest not putting all the food in his mouth so it was going on the floor. I would of course clean it up but I can understand if there was food waste was your little one getting food on the floor by any chance ? Or was she only talking about your husband's plate which seems off she was making gestures before she saw when he got up? I don't know some people have an urge to make noise unnecessarily! It would upset me too tbh. With the old man I said have you never seen children before (it was a kid friendly resort mainly kids maybe 90% he was on his own ) he started shouting what did you say and I left it as no point but honestly upset me a lot! My DH also would ignore etc. Don't worry you didn't do anything wrong so just be reassured she has her back up and she is taking out whatever issues she had on you. Hope you enjoy rest of hols!

@Mummy322 Your son loves sucking lemons 🍋💕
So do I!
Nothing wrong with that at all.

The screwed up face woman sounds barking mad.

She really should wind her neck in and shhhh 🤐🤫🤫🤫

Can you sit away from Shouty?

Hope you can.

That made me laugh. It’s the perfect response. Why have I never thought of it for myself! 😁

I genuinely am embarrassed for her, don't let her spoil your holiday @Mummy322

If she says anything again.
Turn to the husband and say. I'm so sorry that she is embarrassing you. Is there anything I can do to help you ?

And also report her!

Was she drunk OP?

Make sure you have your back to her if at all possible. I would also suggest speaking to management and ask that she is sat nowhere near you.

I wouldn't have engaged with her at all. Maybe a muttered 'my sympathy' to her husband. Ignore her, she sounds deranged.

I like your style.
Also, OP, once your DC is a few years older they will be mortified by any embarrassing behaviour on your part so for god's sake take the opportunity while you can.
'You must lead a very ... small life.'
"You have something in your teeth."
"COME AT ME BRUV"

Sorry, don’t want minimise, as I’m sure this was upsetting, but you do need to just forget about it and move on.
Don’t let a nut job ruin your (probably much needed) holiday

Try to forget about it and just ignore her if she see her again (and try to be seated further away).

Separately, you should try to avoid that kind of resort in future (sounds a bit miserable and claustrophobic with nowhere you can go to explore).

You have no need to be embarrassed, the woman hassling you sounds batshit. If it happens again complain to management. Enjoy your break

I would definitely have confronted her and asked her if she had a problem. I would not have sat there and let a whole table of people laugh at me with no explanation.

I think you did the right thing OP and there is obviously somethign wrong with her. I mean, who does that? When you mentioned you were of colour I immediately thought racism as well because it is extremely odd behaviour. Bloody awful.

It's a shame it leaves a sour taste on your holiday but you do have to confront people like that. It's incredibly rude behaviour and needs calling out. You did the right thing.

Report her to the management, your family are entitled to enjoy your meals in a relaxed manner without any interference from strangers....don't be intimated by her.... don't take any bullshit from her ...all I can say is there are plenty of people like this on earth....they are miserable in there own lives and have no manners....don't take any bullshit....if she bothers you again .... immediately report her to management...she will have to behave or leave the premises....stay strong.....it's horrible when this type of thing happens but it must be stamped out straight away ....enjoy yourself....💪

If she speaks or stares at you again, get a waiter's attention, make a complaint about aggressive behaviour towards you, and ask to be sat away from her/ out of eyeline.

In the kindest possible way, I think he has a point. I would just ignore her and get on with enjoying your holiday. She sounds batshit and there’s no point in engaging with her because these types will always try and have the last word. Not worth it.

Sounds either like racism or possibly she’s mentally ill or just chronically stupid. Either way, you’re on holiday and would presumably prefer to avoid confrontation and hassle, so best thing to do may be to request seating elsewhere. Have a word with the restaurant manager who will sort for tomorrow if not tonight. Enjoy your holiday. Please don’t let random pond life ruin it for you.

Oh I feel your pain, I had to take issue with someone's kids who were dive bombing mine in the pool in Spain, and essentially I had to tell them got a bit shouty to keep their kids away from mine in front of everyone at the pool, in a raised voice with a language barrier (with hysterical 8 year old in tow). Then the rest of the week with them glaring at me from the buffet. It was my first holiday taking them on my own post divorce and I've never felt so alone! You stood up for your family that's all you can do. You did nothing wrong. I really hope you can enjoy the rest of your holiday, they sound extremely rude. Get your sunglasses on and stand tall (or relax on a sunlounger).

It’s a small resort and we can’t go out

Are you on holiday or in a prison? Are you not going to see any of the country you’ve visited?

I hate a dripfeed.

Men's ability to pretend they've not seen something is some times underrated - this is one of those times.

I would love to have your DH's approach, but in reality I'd have done the 'is everything okay' passive aggressive move too and I know it :(

And then felt upset because I hate confrontation.

Just laugh. Don't feel angry and let it spoil her holiday. She sounds mad. Just roll your eyes and laugh. Sometimes I get deliberately overfriendly (sarcastically) with people like that ("oh hiiiiii... have a WONDERFUL day...!... don't be wasting any good now... ta ta!"

That sounds like very bizarre behaviour! Don’t let her spoil your hard earned holiday. Probably for your enjoyment- better to avoid her but you shouldn’t have to. Don’t give her any head space and do complain to the hotel if it gets to point it impacts on your holiday.

what a stupid comment 🙄

In some countries it’s advised you stay in the holiday resort/complex due to some areas being dangerous or risky for tourists.