To think parents who let their kids 'play out' are just completely abdicating responsibility for their kids' behaviour?

[MaybeIWillFuckOffThen]

We have a little walled playground near our house - little climbing frame, slide, stepping stones, toddler swing, very clearly aimed at a young primary/pre-school audience.

It's currently being completely taken over by a huge group of 10-12 preteen/early teen boys playing very rough games of football with real leather footballs. The bang the balls off the walls and hoof them in the air so they go careering everywhere at speed, they run around roughly after the ball pushing and shoving each other and getting in other people's personal space, they fight and shout aggressively and swear. Not a parent in sight of course so no-one to appeal to to get them to moderate their behaviour/find a more suitable venue (like say the massive park 5 minutes walk away). I've had a word now and again but generally just get mutinous stares and/or backchat. I can't really take my kids (2 and 6) there to play any more as it isn't safe for them and the atmosphere is so aggressive.

Why do people just turn their kids out of doors with no idea where they're going/what they're doing? It makes it impossible for other parents - either they have to tell your kid off for you (immediately in the wrong) or they simply have to either put up with inappropriate, loutish behaviour or give way to it and leave.

They no doubt had knives and bottles of white lightning too

Without a doubt.

Yikes are people not allowed to be different?

@Littleloveydovey

"This is a clown world where 6 year old girls are toddlers and 8 year old boys are pre teens"

Yeah, should the 6yr actually be allowed on the toddler equipment?

And there we have it 'exhibiting typical boy behaviour'. Boys will be boys, eh? Grim.

Yikes are people not allowed to be different?

Well all that time wandering the beach has given the op good skills in making up stories. She said so herself.

Don't know why you bother reading MN at all when you've such an active imagination that you can create a whole alternative narrative in your head like that.

Playing football is grim?

Grow up.

Another boy hater.

Don't know why you bother reading MN at all when you've such an active imagination that you can create a whole alternative narrative in your head like that.

Just like yourself in fact.

Op. You need to stop now. Honestly. This is really bad. The stuff you are writing. It’s just awful . A boy deliberately hard kicked a foot ball in your 2 year olds face?

honestly. Just stop now. It’s weird and disturbing and it’s not right.

I think you misunderstood the post. They appear to be saying it’s grim to stereotype.

I have just dropped my 13yo son at the Londis in town with a fiver, to meet his mates. They have a football.
I have asked him who he's with, what they will do and where they'll go.
I have met one of the boys he's with, the others I know only by name.
I hope they will play in an open space rather than the small, enclosed play park, but aside from cruising around town to check I can't check up on him.
I'll send a text in a few hours to see how he's getting on, and he knows I expect a response (just to know we can keep in touch).
Of course I know kids roam around in packs trying to be cool and funny and impress their mates.
He knows I will come down hard on him if I find out he's behaving badly.

Anything else I should be doing?

Playing football isn't grim, no @WiIson
Playing football in a toddler play area, making a toddler bleed, and then other parents laughing about it on a chat forum and calling said toddler girl a princess, is though.

She may well have done. Who cares if she caused no harm to others. There will always be those who are not part of the crowd or find their way later on in life or always walk a quieter life. There’s nothing wrong with that.

And nothing wrong with playing football either. We seem to have lost the art of being considerate towards each other (if we ever had it).

OP isn’t wrong for not wanting to be disturbed by footballs where they don’t belong.

I didn't misunderstand the post. A huge percentage of males enjoy, play or watch football. It's an actual fact. That some women despise.

OP isn’t wrong for not wanting to be disturbed by footballs where they don’t belong.

She can't even get her story straight.

I used to find when I pitched up with my toddler in tow that the older kids would move on.

Now she's a teenager spending most of her time in her bedroom, I'd be bloody delighted if she was outdoors with her friends.

@MaybeIWillFuckOffThen

I can't believe how twisted this thread has become OP.

People read between the lines and come up with their own agendas which reveal their own experiences.

The main protagonist works in a school - you couldn't make it up.

My grandchildren have been hit by balls in a toddler playground. Older children, boys or girls, should have the intelligence to realise they should not be playing anywhere near where a toddler could get hurt - accidentally or not. I'm not convinced it is all accidental - no one thinking clearly would boot a hard case football about aggressively within range of a toddler.

There isn't enough space to play football. Which is exactly my point!

I wish I could post a photo without it being incredibly outing! Basically the park is at the end of a row of terraced houses and is about as wide as a terraced house. there's a gate at each end. down one end (between two brick walls either side) is the play equipment; the boys use one wall each as a 'goal' and weave between the equipment to do so.

At the other end there is a sort of square surrounded by benches with elevated shrubbery behind them. This is almost always completely empty bar the odd person having a sit-down and a sandwich. All the kids and parents are clustered down the other end round the equipment. The whole thing is no longer than the depth of a two back to back terraced houses.

I don't know WHY they don't use the empty end, and I assume it's because there's nothing obvious to act as a 'goal' like the walls do.

I don't think OP banked on the fact a lot of posters on here will shock horror be mothers of boys (of all ages) my son is lovely, polite and well brought up. It saddens me that because he is a boy some mothers view him with disdain and suspicion.
Obviously if OP'S toddler did get a ball kicked into her face that is awful but the attitude that seeps through her posts is that all boys are terrible (what about the grown up one that fathered her child, I assume he was deemed okay!)
For what it's worth, the biggest injury my youngest (girl) received was done to her by another girl. My son has never had a scratch on him, his friends are as gentle as he is.

Umm... so not wanting your kids knocked down is somehow irredeemably precious, but god forbit they get a bit muddy??? What?

My kids play in the mud all the time because it's enormous fun. You know where actual footballers play actual football? Ummm...

But they wouldn't actually have to 'play football in the mud'. It's a paved area surrounded by shrubby bushes planted in sort of muddy banks. They might at worst have to pluck the ball out of a bush from time to time.

See this is a perfect example. What bloody muddy clearing? You've completely made that up.

Because the thread was moving very fast and i'm about 10 pages behind.

@TheOrigRights - well clearly you are one of those parents the OP is talking about who are ‘ abdicating responsibility’ 🙄
I’m still waiting for the OP to tell us what we should be doing with our teens …

And it is term time where we are still. Next week will be far worse 😖

I am wondering why there are school aged children out playing at 9am. What time does school start where you are?
Maybe if they are in school uniform and they are being aggressive (physically or verbally) towards you or your child you could have a word with the school.

We get emails from the head if people have reported anti-social behaviour from pupils.

Ask them where they're going, maybe check on them every now and then by walking by on your wat to the shop or whatever - not every time they go out, very rarely, but enough that they know they're not completely unaccountable. Give them responsibilities like going out to do some shopping for the family on their own, picking up and dropping off younger siblings to school/clubs/playdates, try and get them a Saturday job or a paper round, things that actually teach them about being an adult rather than just hanging around with their mates. Lots of ways to foster independence without just throwing up your hands and hoping for the best, especially before about 14.