To ask what boarding school is like

[Thesweetlife]

I went to a ‘normal’ state school and so did all my friends, both when I was a child and now. My life in my childhood/early teen years consisted of going to school, going home, eating tea with my family, watching TV, saw my friends on the weekends etc. It was quite a mundane life but I was very happy in my school days. I guess I wonder what it’s like to go to boarding school. How was your (or your DC’s) life different to that of the normal child/teen? Where you happy at your time at boarding school? Have you been shaped by it in the long run? How did it influence you in the long run? What sort of things went on that someone who went to a day school would be surprised by?

I thought I knew which school you were talking about, but it can't have been if it was a girls' school. Unless you were there before 1999.

I think the point is that separation from your parents prematurely (which depending on the child could vary, admittedly) is inherently damaging, however lovely the school might be. Realistically not all are lovely.

@Dancingcandlesticks I do agree with you, in fact - in that separation from parents does very much vary depending on the child. My youngest child didn't board until the sixth form, at their request. There was no pressure on my DC at all - it was always very clear to them that they could either not go at all, or could change their minds if they gave it a go and didn't like it.

I'm sure it's also true that not all boarding schools are lovely. Like day schools, some are fantastic, and others are horrendous. Or some might be fantastic for one child, but horrendous for another. Choosing a school to suit the individual child is another important factor.

I boarded from age 8 to 9, then age 13 to 18 at two different schools.
The break was due to my parents work taking us abroad and they wanted us in the same country.

I can’t really compare my experience to state schools as I have no experience of that.
I loved boarding and when we returned to the UK I was desperate to board again.

There were 14 houses in our school. 12 of which were boarding
Each house took students from every year so i grew up with many role models and then as I got older became one myself.
Compared to my non boarding cousins I and my siblings were / are now definitely more independent and outgoing.
Talking to people and making friends was easy as the houses were very nurturing and this is something I still benefit from.
We grew up being busy all the time with lots of things to do. We never sat in our rooms watching to or Googling ( except now I’m older on MN)
The days always started early and ended late. Always on the go doing a huge variety of things. One day I might go for a run, have breakfast, then school lessons, then orchestra practice and straight on to an evening open lecture or helping out at the theatre or go for a swim. Then prep and a chat / lounge back at the house.

Most houses had pets, a housemaster, matron and helper. Then house tutors who focused on about 6/8 students each for personal support.

My sons also boarded and also loved it and, much like my experience, are very easy going easy to make friends type of people. They also are very proactive with many interests.
As we lived near their school we hadn’t intended on them boarding but they really wanted to. They felt they were missing out on the whole experience of their school. They went to The Kings School Canterbury.

I went to a small single sex boarding school for secondary age onwards.

It was great. As an extrovert only child I loved being around so many friends all the time and it meant I could do lots of extra curricular things easily. I felt the rules were quite fair. I loved getting up and only having to walk 3 minutes to assembly. We were a bit naughty (some were VERY naughty) but most teens are. I was rarely homesick.

I think it did impact my relationship with my parents but that was partly down to their personalities and choices as well.

I went for sixth form and absolutely loved it!! Would I send a young child - no. I think it's fine from 14ish but don't really see the need unless the parents live abroad.