To be horrified by these ‘baby boxes’?

[TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl]

This just came up on my newsfeed and I’m absolutely horrified by the whole concept of women abandoning their newborns in the US:

www.newschannel10.com/2023/02/10/newborn-surrendered-baby-box-installed-less-than-3-months-ago/?fbclid=IwAR1qz7BbrIeF390b6YXl4mAscw82cTvt-Bzwnp_LMaZMMCjBcpltEZGHav0#ldzrvrvoa7ecauugx04

Im NOT having a go at these women, and this is supposedly to prevent newborns being abandoned in unsafe places.

But surely the answer isn’t “Hey brand new mum with raging hormones, probably depression, who is tired, stressed and not thinking straight - put your baby here for a nice new family” - it should be about supporting mums with PND, improving practical support, healthcare and rights of new mothers and reproductive rights. Not just “Oh well you don’t feel OK today so probably best you don’t be a mum, here’s a little box to pop your baby in”.

My spidey senses were tingling so when I did a bit of further research, the woman who started these is, of course, fiercely anti abortion. So that’s what it’s all about. it’s about not allowing women their reproductive rights but making them go through a birth they don’t want, have the trauma of having a baby they don’t want but it’s OK, and the heartache of giving them away - no harm done ey 😡

Babies have always been abandoned.

It's not particularly tied up with politics, abortion or societal attitudes. There have always been women who deny their pregnancy (even to themselves), or can't cope with the decision making of pregnancy and find themselves having given birth in challenging circumstances. As a result newborns have been buried, put in bins, rivers, the sea...for as long as humans have been fertile.

Baby boxes are a humane alternative and keeping them available and making sure people are aware means that a girl or woman in these circumstances has a better option.

The intention is not about the mother who has given birth in usual circumstances, who later feels they can't cope due to PND etc. In those circumstances, a mother isn't really going to be able to anonymously drop a baby off in one of these boxes. But if things were that bad, and they did, it seems like a least worst option for someone who is that unwell?

So you are horrified that a scheme exists to keep babies safe and alive and you would prefer they were killed before they were born instead. Right ok!

Unfortunately not being ready to have a baby doesn't prevent pregnancy.

It was clear to me OP.

About 500 babies a year are abandoned in the UK. Nine a week!

Child abandonment is illegal in the UK, but in practice, action is seldom taken against the mother, if she is found, concern being more for her health and well being.

I would prefer it to be legal, with a safe facility in every town.

I've never heard of these before, think they are a brilliant idea.

What would you rather? Would you rather that a scared new mum, maybe a 13 year old girl, dumps her baby to die behind a wheelie bin? Because that happens? I’ve seen documentaries on this and the alarm sounds within 2 minutes to alert the people inside (so the mum has a short chance to get away) It’s so much better than the alternative and I think it’s a great idea. Women have killed their babies because they’re so worried about people finding out about them. Would you prefer that?!!

You're aware abortion is illegal in the US right? These boxes are for women who have had zero choice but to give birth to a child that for whatever reason they can't raise. It saves lives from illegal abortions and stops babies being dumped in rubbish bins etc

It's horrible. All part of the republican religious right, attack on the rights of women and maintaining "the domestic supply of infants" for adoption as a US Supreme Court Judge put it.

If care and appropriate social support was available for the mothers it would not be necessary.

Abhorrent. Adoption is trauma.

I don’t think you understand a very complex situation enough to be giving these boxes so much rage. They do give women choices and they also give babies a chance to be placed somewhere safe.

I think OP expected everyone to join with her in virtuous outrage and is surprised that others have known an thought about this too.

Far better there are safe and dry places for the baby and information for the mother should she want to be reunitied with her baby.

Babies are abandoned all over the world for many different reasons. This is a compassionate response to that complicated situation.

Staggeringly naïve. Read around the issue.

Can't you have better support, maternity leave, etc, and also baby boxes?

And we don't have them in the UK, but there have been babies abandoned here, occasionally you hear of it on the news, so maybe we should have them. Thankfully it's rare, but then so, by all accounts, is the use of these boxes.

I understand your horror. The boxes exist, support and healthcare for women does not.
In a better world, women would have more support, and not feel they need to abandon an unwanted baby behind a wheelie bin.

Ask yourselves why we don’t have them in the UK

Well I am asking myself why we don't have them in the UK. The amount if times there's been horrific news stories about a baby being found dead in a carrier bag, or an abandoned baby found frozen to death, maybe we should.

‘My spidey senses’ - please never use this embarrassing phrase again. Baby boxes make sure people who can’t look after their children can ensure the baby is looked after with no question asked. Who they hell do you think you are to tell anyone who wants to use them that they are wrong. You sound incredibly naive.

Baby boxes or baby hatches are used in several countries including Switzerland and others in and around the EU.

They have alarms that notify staff immediately so the baby can be collected within minutes, they're safe, warm and as important, they are often part of a wider program that allows the parent anterior of time to collect the baby afterwards and work with social services to retain parental rights.

One of my friends was abandoned in a phone box 50 odd years ago, we read about babies being left in parks.

These programmes give a safe place to leave the baby and an opportunity to seek support.

In what way is this linked to abortion laws, when about 1 baby per WEEK is abandoned in the UK ? I'd be happy to see Safe Haven boxes available here, to save those babies from a cold and neglected death .

This is what you’re focusing on? Not the poor state of mental health services, unaffordability of health care, lack of maternity benefits, lack of sex education and lack of access to abortion? Yes OP, it’s the boxes that are the issue.

That ^^
I use 2 forms of contraception. If I got pregnant and it was too late to have an abortion, I absolutely would not be keeping a baby. So I can see why people use the boxes

(Before anyone starts, I would love a child, but can't afford one so physically no way of keeping one and I imagine other people are in the same situation)
Not everyone knows they are pregnant early enough

And I think they should be available in the U.K. they don't replace access to safe legal abortion but should be an add on to it

I think this sort of system to allow abandonment of a baby with anonymity for the mother started in the 12th Century - look up “foundling wheels”. I can imagine in a world with limited food security, no contraception, no consequences for the perpetrators of rape and or violence, and where many women had no resources (and if they were lucky family assistance) it was a reasonable solution that gave an unwanted or unsupported child a chance of survival.
And yes OP, I agree, its literally a medieval solution and surely we can do better for mothers in this day and age.

My grandmother was abandoned as a baby in the 1920's. She was left on a door step in the cold during a winter storm. She's very lucky she survived, was taken in by this family and went on to live a long life with a big family of her own. Many many abandoned babies aren't that lucky though. Many end up being abandoned in dangerous situations, become unwell or die. Why on earth you'd think this concept is a bad idea is absolutely baffling. Baby boxes have been around for a very long time, especially in many European countries, where is your outrage at that?