To be horrified by these ‘baby boxes’?

[TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl]

This just came up on my newsfeed and I’m absolutely horrified by the whole concept of women abandoning their newborns in the US:

www.newschannel10.com/2023/02/10/newborn-surrendered-baby-box-installed-less-than-3-months-ago/?fbclid=IwAR1qz7BbrIeF390b6YXl4mAscw82cTvt-Bzwnp_LMaZMMCjBcpltEZGHav0#ldzrvrvoa7ecauugx04

Im NOT having a go at these women, and this is supposedly to prevent newborns being abandoned in unsafe places.

But surely the answer isn’t “Hey brand new mum with raging hormones, probably depression, who is tired, stressed and not thinking straight - put your baby here for a nice new family” - it should be about supporting mums with PND, improving practical support, healthcare and rights of new mothers and reproductive rights. Not just “Oh well you don’t feel OK today so probably best you don’t be a mum, here’s a little box to pop your baby in”.

My spidey senses were tingling so when I did a bit of further research, the woman who started these is, of course, fiercely anti abortion. So that’s what it’s all about. it’s about not allowing women their reproductive rights but making them go through a birth they don’t want, have the trauma of having a baby they don’t want but it’s OK, and the heartache of giving them away - no harm done ey 😡

Also in the camp of thinking they’re a great idea. If you’ve ever watched any documentaries about foundlings the place they are found is hugely tied up with their sense of worth. To be placed in a drop off box means your birth mother wanted to ensure your safety.

I think they're a good idea.

Its like food banks.

That shouldn't have to exist. But its brilliant they do.

I think they are a great idea, but its sad that it is needed

Well I am horrified that these boxes are an option and abortions are not

I agree.

Some of these babies are surrendered because the mothers are in an abusive relationship, or the mother has given birth in secret because her family would kick her out. I really do not think they're aimed at or used by women with supportive and stable homes who have PND.

To be honest we probably should have them here. Beats finding them in a recycling bin (last year, Cambridge) or dead outside a hospital (last month, Barnet).

This is a charity, right? So they are controlling something they can control. They can't remove poverty in the US or reinstate abortion rights.

I believe that it's illegal to abandon a baby in the UK, which is I guess the reason we can't have these boxes. Around 1 baby a week is abandoned in the UK. It's a shame UK law wasn't changed to better support mothers.

And in the meantime?

I agree they shouldn’t be needed. Of course there should be more support for new mums and better abortion access. What a depressing world we live in.

The mothers have a period of time to come back and be offered support and claim their child back. Inside each box is a pouch full of information. It isn’t a done deal that once they hand over the baby they lose all their rights. It is wonderful resource.

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baby_hatch

here, OP, educate yourself. A mechanism like this has been around for hundreds of years in multiple countries. I wish we DID have them in the U.K. It gives mothers another option. In Germany, in the rare instance that they are used, mothers can go back for the baby within 8 weeks, and they know they’re looked after. Beats leaving them on a doorstep or smothering them, as a pp said.

Even with everything we have in the UK I've just done a quick Google and found at least 1 abandoned baby in the UK in 2019, 2021 and 2022. Hospitals etc have policies for it in place. Safe boxes are all in public buildings occupied 24h a day, I think its a good thing.

In many parts of US almost impossible to get an abortion. Only fair to give these women who really don't want anything to do with baby an easier opt out. Better than babies being abandoned in parks at night.

In the ideal world they wouldn't be needed but we are not in an ideal world but I do kind of agree with you OP.

I wish there was (additionally) a place women could check themselves in for a day or a few nights or however long works for them with their baby where they could get fast-track psychological and medical support from specialists with advice on what ongoing support is out there. A system where if they then chose then to leave without the baby it can happen without judgement.

You have really wrong ideas about who uses these boxes, and why.

And if a woman or girl changes her mind after leaving her baby, she can call and re-claim it. Which she can't if she leaves the baby on a doorstep and it dies of exposure.

These aren't women in relationships with acknowledged pregnancies who struggle with their newborn and leave it there in a moment of madness. This is teen girls who become pregnant by familial rape and hide or deny their pregnancies and give birth in secret. These are often births and pregnancies that take place completely outside of healthcare.

As a professional involved in child protection I’m in favour of these and I’ve always felt there should be a way parents can do this as i think it’d save lives. I completely agree that all the things that you say should be in place should be and help should be better. You say about a moment of madness but that same person could in a moment of madness abandon their baby somewhere less safe

Horrified that women don't have access to abortion absolutely.
Horrified these boxes exist? Absolutely not.

Your be surprised how much help these ‘anti choice loons’ give to pregnant women who want to keep their babies and consequently are not in a position where they feel there is no other option than abortion.
She is continuing this work with babies who are born. It’s better than a baby in a bin or left in a park.
abortion isn’t always the answer.
None of the abortion providers give women any help with this- to keep their babies and there can be many reasons why women leave their baby - at least they know they will be safe and cared for. It’s actually an act of love.

It's not new, it was to stop babies being abandoned in parks, in alleys etc.

I feel for any woman (or sometimes only a child themselves) who is this desperate and having a safe mechanism they can give up their baby saves lives. There's of course the option to put up for adoption etc but there are situations so complex that they do not want to be associated with the child at all, you can't understand if you haven't been there I don't think

I don't think there is a problem with the boxes in of themselves but I think there is a massive problem with them being viewed as an alternative to abortion

The fact that in the US adoption agencies are often private or faith based makes this even worse

It's part of an agenda to force poor , young or troubled women who find themselves pregnant to act as am incubator with no bodily autonomy so that the fetus can be 'saved' and given to nice straight, traditional, Christian families

In a country like Germany they are a lifeline for very rare desperate situations (and they do try to reunite and help the women if possible), in America they're a symptom women's rights being stripped away

I feel very on the fence.

Theres many women who don’t want an abortion but also don’t want the child. They also feel they can’t be open about their pregnancy and follow proper surrender routes. These boxes are used, and even when abortion is available.

These boxes are a response to a need. We shouldn’t need them, but we do. It’s not like people stop abandoning babies as long as abortion is available

Care for the children should be better to help them overcome the feelings that often come with being an abandoned baby. But also, we have no clue of these children would have been better off, mentally, had they not been left. They may not have had good lives and simply suffered with other traumas. I don’t see this being a reason these boxes shouldn’t exist.

I really dont believe anyone does it on a whim. Mothers who do it, then regret, clearly did need to extra support. They can go back (time permitting) go through the proper channels, get support and then see how they feel.

I, personally, believe that the ‘anti abortion’ people actually do need to come up with realistic ideas of alternative options, if they really Believe abortion shouldn’t happen. They want to stop abortions, but wash their hands of anything that happens after to the mother or child. At least the woman you talk about is doing something. You may not like it, but it’s something.

The situation is horrific. You are in an incredibly judgemental country, where abortion is illegal, health care is expensive and paid maternity leave is unheard of. Even with the proper support accessible, I imagine the women and girls using the boxes would possibly incredibly vulnerable and outside of society.

I’m horrified that the HAVE to exist, not that they do. With the removal of women’s rights in the US they have a safer option should they need it, I’d rather that than babies being dumped and left to die.

It's been going on since the 12th century.

"In 1198, Pope Innocent III promulgated an unusual decree for all churches in Italy: each was mandated to install a small, wooden architectural feature. These “foundling wheels” have been saving hundreds of thousands of lives ever since.
Foundling wheels were roughly two feet tall and were located on a church’s street-facing wall. From the outside, they looked like rectangular windows, however they were actually rotating cylinders, just large enough to fit a newborn baby....."

An excellent idea, even today.