11/12 year old drinking

[McCrispy]

at a family party
allowed 2 drinks with water in between whilst adult is monitoring

yanbu - that’s not on abs will lead to alcohol issues and associated dangers

yabu - it’s legal and allows kids to learn about drinking sensibly

It's an interesting first post, anyway, op. ;)

My 12yo likes pimms and lemonade. He's allowed the occasional one - but I mix him his own and put about three drops of pimms in it 😁

My parents would allow me to sip a glass of champagne as a kid on new years. So in some sense I could argue there was no longterm damage.

But personally I don't intend to run my household like that. My kids won't be permitted any alcohol under my roof until they're fully grown adults.

I hear people say giving them alcohol too early will turn them into big drinkers.

I hear people say making them wait until they are older makes it a grown up thing and they will become big drinkers.

Generally I think your attitude to alcohol is the biggest factor on how they will behave with alcohol so do what you think is right.

God no not at 11 or 12. Remember very reluctantly agreeing to one glass of fizz on new years eve at 13 at a friend's house. Was v. uncomfortable about it at the time. Dd is 16 at Christmas she had a glass of champagne before dinner and 2 rum and cokes (measures monitored by us) after dinner. That was it.

I let my dd1 age 14 (almost 15) have a gin and lemonade on new year’s eve. my theory is that open conversation and nothing banned leads to a healthy relationship with alcohol rather than trying everything with mates in a field which my friends who were forbidden did - I drank with them but new what I liked.

11 yo twins I let have a sip of my drink but nothing more than that.

Its a hell no from me. At that age, plenty of non alcoholic 'treat' drinks to give. No need whatsoever for alcohol. Madness

YANBU
My brother was curious/interested in alcohol from a very young age. By mid teens was drinking regularly, by mid 20's was alcoholic - obvious to all around him. He has been dry for many years now but has replaced the alcohol with weed which has made him paranoid and very difficult to deal with.

I'd be concerned in your situation

Two 8-9% glasses of alcohol? No way! Children are unable to metabolise alcohol as quickly as adults and that is just asking for trouble. I also feel uneasy about the message it's sending to children - why stop at 2 glasses? What about when they whine for a third?

I wouldn't say the same if it was a sip from an adult's glass, or a well-watered down small glass of wine of their own for a toast.

When I was a kid, my dad used to make wine and we would all have a glass of it around the table at sunday lunch. The glasses were tiny! and the wine was terrible! - and thinking back, yes, I think he did water down my younger sibs portions. So that's "normal" for me. Still is, really!

God no!
But if it's not your child, you can't really comment to them. The parents would only get arsey

Oh.

My instinctive pearl clutching adult me says no. But this was my childhood and it was great! I had the usual British Drinking Culture experience between 18 - 20yo but since then I rarely drink and haven't had a hangover in years (late 30s)

Way too young, why would they do that!

However, the poster who said 18 🤣 good luck with that

Why on earth do you think a child of that age needs alcohol?!
This
They wouldn't even like the taste, a soft drink far more appropriate, why would you want to normalise the need for alcohol to socialise?Kids can manage perfectly well without it don't burden them with the idea they need alcohol at parties to enjoy themselves

Seems a little bit young tbh!
13/14 yeah, 11 no, not for me

If it's only at a special occasion party, then it's fine.

I used to let mine have a glass of champagne at weddings, which hardly sets a precedent for most of life. Extended to Christmas as well when teens.

If it means family party as in every family gathering, I'd be rather more wary, until mid teens

Nope. No need for that.

I also don't see the need for giving little kids 'wine' at pamper days or alcohol free cider and pretending it's real. Heard of both of those this week, for 6 year olds.

I’m not much of a drinker now but I’m pretty relaxed about it as well.
We allow DS half a shandy on holiday if he likes and it was the same with DD but from 13/14.
I agree that alcohol shouldn’t be made into a big deal and gradual exposure is a better idea but 11 is a bit young

Every Saturday morning, there’s at least one thread like this. 🙄

So what’s the view on energy drinks at that age ?

I think it depends. I would let my kids that age have a glass of prosecco to make a toast - it would make them feel grown up and help them to feel part of a celebration. I wouldn't let them have spirits, just drinking for the sake of it, because I think you're teaching them that they need alcohol to have fun. I wouldn't let them have 2 because that would probably make them tipsy even with water in between.
You're contradicting yourself here. You're saying you'd allow them a glass of prosecco to feel part of a celebration but on the otherhand you don't want them to think they need alcohol to have fun 🥴 surely giving them the glass of prosecco does just that?

My kids won't be permitted any alcohol under my roof until they're fully grown adults

You know they'll just go and drink elsewhere with friends though yeah? I'm assuming you don't have kids yet

OP, far too young to be drinking spirits like that. There's just no need at that age

Energy drinks also No. That's why there is an 18 limit on them

Hence under my roof? They could also do crack cocaine with their friends, that doesn't mean I need to be a supplier.

Legal drinking age is not 18, it’s illegal to buy alcohol til 18 but not to drink it providing you are given it by a responsible adult.