Would you be annoyed?

[AmIreallyBeverly]

Persons A and B go to the same hobby group. They get on but aren't "friends".

They end up at a mutual friend's party. Neither are drinking.

Person A can't drive and had planned to get a taxi home.

Person B happens to mention they are driving past Person A's road on the way home.

Person A asks Person B if they can have a lift to the end of their road when they leave.

If you were Person B would you feel put on and annoyed?

Would’ve been fine for her to have offered, but bad mannered to put her on the spot and asked. “can I be cheeky and..” is in the same category as “I’m not being funny but…” prefacing a sentence to basically say “I know I’m in the wrong here, however..”

She seems a misery, you offered her the chance to say no and money too! Maybe she just doesn’t care for other people in her car much?
As a non-driver I don’t ask for lifts as I feel like a burden, my friends push me to take their offers at times but I usually say I’ll get a bus/have ordered a taxi as I’d hate to be seen as that non-driver who takes advantage.
If I were able to drive though (hopefully soon!) I’d be fine with giving someone I know a lift if it was on my way home without sighing and pulling a face. 🤨

I can't help but wonder how you get through life when something so trivial causes you so much trouble...

You behaved impeccably. She on the other hand was rude. Sighing and acting put out, she doesn’t like you but it’s probably due to her own issues and nothing to do with you. When she sighed I would have said never mind. I no longer tolerate people who show ill will toward me or my loved ones.

She replied with a thumbs-up.

Oof. Yeah she's pissed off

Since B didn’t know where you live and was just talking generally, I can understand why they’d be put out in the moment. I’ve definitely had situations where I mention that I’m doing x or going to x and had people jump in with “Oh good, so you can do [blank] for me!” I always think to myself that I need to keep my bloody mouth shut, though really the issue is people ambushing me with errands. Of course, they’re typically much more inconvenient than dropping someone along the way.

I doubt they’re seriously annoyed so I wouldn’t worry about that. I would take it as a reminder not to impose when something hasn’t been offered or hinted at though.

Not one bit…i always offer to drop others off….its being polite and treating others how you would like to be treated.

What strikes me is this was a chance to become better acquainted as you both attend same class, and she’s driving right past your street anyway. She sounds like an unlikeable person. Steer clear.

Oh no! I can imagine the lift giver will be traumatised by the knowledge that someone won't tolerate them offering a lift.

Not unreasonable IMHO as it's not out of their way.

I would feel put upon. I’d worry that my car wasn’t clean, that I’d not be able to leave spontaneously, that I’d need to make chit-chat… but then I’m not very extroverted.

Want to add I agree with pp that unfortunately it’s best not to ask for lifts as the person might resent it and feel he or she has to do it. It’s odd though that in this case she really didn’t want to.

What? She didn’t offer a lift.

If she's driving that way anyway then it's not unreasonable to ask for a lift, especially since you offered her petrol money too. She's probably just thinking that you're going to ask every week now cause you know she goes past your road. When you don't she'll realise she was being rude and presumptuous.

Well not even offering in this case, Acquiescence after direct request!

what’s trivial to you may not be trivial to a different person.
you do know that people are different?

I assume that was at me? You know full well it’s not very nice to roll her eyes and sigh whilst agreeing to the lift after she said she was going OPs way.

Maybe person A thought person B mentioned it in a way it was more of 'I'm passing and happy to give you a lift',.

I'd be happy to as I prefer company when driving.

She sounds like a dick. After she sighed and rolled her eyes I would have said, no worries it’s fine. Then even if she realised she was being a dick and back tracked I still wouldn’t have taken the lift from the miserable cow!

Personally I can’t stand giving non drivers a lift and if people ask me I feel awkwardly obliged to say yes when inside I’m dying to say no. Even if money is offered I just feel like saying do I look like a taxi

People are very odd about giving lifts IMO.

I can't drive. I'm an expert on public transport, though, and use it all the time. Recently, I was in a situation where an acquaintance offered me a lift several times to somewhere they were going too. I accepted with thanks. On occasion when we were at the venue together I paid for coffee and cake by way of thank you. No I didn't offer petrol money, but then I wasn't asking for these lifts either - I could very easily (and more quickly) have got there on public transport. After a while they started giving reasons only to offer a lift one way, or to say they weren't able to take me on such and such a day. I said fine, no problem, may see you there. I was relieved when the thing we were both attending finished.

As it's a one-off, I'd drop you at your door/within my view iyswim.
I'd rather know you're home safe than not.
I wouldn't accept petrol money.
I would NOT be rolling my eyes and sighing.

I don’t get why this is a problem or why it is an AIBU issue. Am I missing something?

Nope, if your doing a hobby with someone you know (well enough) and driving past their house, literally no trouble at all for them to jump out. If it became a regular thing, then you would probably expect the person getting the lift to offer some petrol money.

Should say as well that the class is at a location between my house and theirs, so lifts after class would be out of their way. I can see why they might be concerned I'd ask for them. I wouldn't but can see they might be already feeling like they need to prepare themselves!

Comments taken on board. Thanks.