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Original poster

Can we have nothing for ourselves? Male fucking menopause

206 replies

GNR2022 · 03/02/2023 12:34

Don’t think I can bring myself to watch this segment on Packed Lunch. Debilitating for them apparently…

OP posts:
unsureatthispoint · 04/02/2023 08:33

MarcusInColusseumEst · 04/02/2023 08:18

so I find this interesting, do posters have any experience with their other half's / dad's / brother's andropause? Hoe does it present?

Would you say a 70 year old man has the same 'oomph' than a 25 year old?

RoseslnTheHospital · 04/02/2023 08:33

@SamanthaCaine my username suggests I'm a manic street preachers fan Wink

MarcusInColusseumEst · 04/02/2023 08:39

unsureatthispoint · 04/02/2023 08:33

Would you say a 70 year old man has the same 'oomph' than a 25 year old?

Show quote history

I'm not sure what you mean. I have never hear of andropause and have no idea how common it is. Peri and menopause are very challenging for many women (me included) and I have never thought that my DH might experience a different version of male hormone change and related health issues. I know rather a fair bit about peri and meno but wondered what particular symptoms men experience. Obviously people age but the hormonal changes during the menopause are not what a 70 year old woman experiences ash she will besot likely thought it. So if there is a period of specific hormone related health issues and needs, what are they.

MarcusInColusseumEst · 04/02/2023 08:40

RoseslnTheHospital · 04/02/2023 08:22

It presents as the NHS page describes, as a whole host of various issues that are caused by various lifestyle and situational issues eg stress, weight gain. None of which are caused by a change in testosterone levels.

OK, so no hormonal changes but lifestyle, stress, weight etc. That's more what I thought.

unsureatthispoint · 04/02/2023 08:41

MarcusInColusseumEst · 04/02/2023 08:39

I'm not sure what you mean. I have never hear of andropause and have no idea how common it is. Peri and menopause are very challenging for many women (me included) and I have never thought that my DH might experience a different version of male hormone change and related health issues. I know rather a fair bit about peri and meno but wondered what particular symptoms men experience. Obviously people age but the hormonal changes during the menopause are not what a 70 year old woman experiences ash she will besot likely thought it. So if there is a period of specific hormone related health issues and needs, what are they.

Show quote history

It's true that health issues for men may not be as severe or noticeable

Boomboom22 · 04/02/2023 09:01

Ffs the difference is if any man goes to the Dr even with lifestyle issues they will be believed and helped. Women will be told to live weight, that it is normal hormones, that they are depressed etc and have to fight to get appropriate treatment. To suggest men are behind in this is beyond ludicrous.

Megifer · 04/02/2023 09:26

Boomboom22 · 04/02/2023 09:01

Ffs the difference is if any man goes to the Dr even with lifestyle issues they will be believed and helped. Women will be told to live weight, that it is normal hormones, that they are depressed etc and have to fight to get appropriate treatment. To suggest men are behind in this is beyond ludicrous.

They are always believed.

My dp had a few odd symptoms a few years ago, they could have been connected to excessive alcohol. Gp asked him if he drank, he said no (lie at the time). That was that, sent for scans within 2 weeks. All fine, so prob was alcohol. What a waste of time.

About a year later similar happened to me. THE SAME GP asked if I drank, I was honest and said 2 glasses of wine a week. Got a suspicious look, sent for blood tests. Some liver levels came back high. Told it was alcohol connected, to abstain totally for 2 months and go back. Fine although was puzzled that 2 wines could do that. Tests came back high again. Grilled about alcohol use, asked if i was depressed and that's why I drink, abstain again, more tests in 2 months. Came back even higher. Finally sent for scans.

turns out I had a cyst on my liver that was causing the problems. Not the alcohol that I didn't drink.

Don't tell me men aren't taken seriously.

Floofydawg · 04/02/2023 11:37

@Megifer that's shocking 😡

MrsMullerBecameABaby · 04/02/2023 12:36

Felix125 · 03/02/2023 21:24

MrsMullerBecameABaby

And what causes periods to stop?

Hormonal changes in your body

hormonal changes in your body cause a massive range of things which aren't menopause! Why do you so desperately want to use a gynecological term for men? Hormonal changes in your body cause teenage acne - do you want us to call acne menopause?

Why the desperation to make language so vague and general that it becomes largely meaningless?

Hellsmovie · 04/02/2023 13:08

Megifer · 04/02/2023 09:26

They are always believed.

My dp had a few odd symptoms a few years ago, they could have been connected to excessive alcohol. Gp asked him if he drank, he said no (lie at the time). That was that, sent for scans within 2 weeks. All fine, so prob was alcohol. What a waste of time.

About a year later similar happened to me. THE SAME GP asked if I drank, I was honest and said 2 glasses of wine a week. Got a suspicious look, sent for blood tests. Some liver levels came back high. Told it was alcohol connected, to abstain totally for 2 months and go back. Fine although was puzzled that 2 wines could do that. Tests came back high again. Grilled about alcohol use, asked if i was depressed and that's why I drink, abstain again, more tests in 2 months. Came back even higher. Finally sent for scans.

turns out I had a cyst on my liver that was causing the problems. Not the alcohol that I didn't drink.

Don't tell me men aren't taken seriously.

Show quote history

Its wierd the same doctor handled it differently

Shabbadabbadoo · 04/02/2023 13:20

Wait. What? When you have a surgical menopause you are supposed to have testosterone replaced as well? So my fucking hormone replacement therapy isn’t actually replacing all the hormones I’ve lost? So this could be the reason I have felt like absolute crap all through my forties - ever since the operation ten years ago? While I am very grateful not to experience horrific flooding; losing all my energy and enthusiasm and drive was not fucking worth it. And there, ladies and gentlemen is women’s healthcare in a nutshell. No one cares. And to think I had to fight tooth and nail and wait nearly two years to get the hysterectomy in the first place! FFS.

SamanthaCaine · 04/02/2023 15:20

RoseslnTheHospital · 04/02/2023 08:33

@SamanthaCaine my username suggests I'm a manic street preachers fan Wink

Haha brilliant Grin

Felix125 · 04/02/2023 19:54

Megifer
My dp had a few odd symptoms a few years ago.......

So you told the doctor two different things and you wonder why you got two different outcomes.....?

Felix125 · 04/02/2023 20:00

MrsMullerBecameABaby
hormonal changes in your body cause a massive range of things which aren't menopause!

i know they do - but they also cause the menopause. What do you think is chiefly responsible for your body ending your menstrual cycle?

And what ever you want to call similar symptoms in men - and i have never said that its the male menopause - the affects on some men can be serious. Not all men, but some men.

I just don't think is right or fair to ridicule men who are suffering similar symptoms

MrsMullerBecameABaby · 04/02/2023 20:16

Felix125 · 04/02/2023 20:00

MrsMullerBecameABaby
hormonal changes in your body cause a massive range of things which aren't menopause!

i know they do - but they also cause the menopause. What do you think is chiefly responsible for your body ending your menstrual cycle?

And what ever you want to call similar symptoms in men - and i have never said that its the male menopause - the affects on some men can be serious. Not all men, but some men.

I just don't think is right or fair to ridicule men who are suffering similar symptoms

Nobody should be ridiculed.

Tbh the "mid life crisis" accusation is thrown at both men and women for a range of behaviours which are lifestyle choices (having an affair especially with a younger person, buying a sports car, drastically changing their fashion choices in favour of styles more often chosen by people a generation younger, returning to clubbing after a 30 year break, or similar) NOT remotely for being diagnosed with depressive disorders or other mental or physical health issues. Actually middle aged women are far more often ridiculed than middle aged men.

The endocrine system is involved in almost every process in the body and claims that anything related to hormonal changes should be called menopause is utterly inappropriate. It's very important to name things precisely in order to address them usefully, not to just say that because finally, after being taboo and dismissed for hundreds of years, menopause is starting to be taken seriously we need to apply the word to men despite it being a gynecological term because women should never have exclusive use of language which might make men feel taken more seriously, no matter what the language refers to.

Men's mental health has rightfully had a lot of public attention and sympathy recently and women haven't tried to center themselves in the discussion - quite rightly.

Men should not be centered in discussions about menopause the moment it starts to be taken seriously either.

Felix125 · 05/02/2023 16:57

MrsMullerBecameABaby
The endocrine system is involved in almost every process in the body and claims that anything related to hormonal changes should be called menopause is utterly inappropriate

I am not saying it is - what i am saying is that the menopause is brought about by falling levels of estrogen & progesterone in a woman's body. This is brought about by physiological changes in the ovaries (such as cell destruction with age)

This then leads to the symptoms which a lot of women suffer from including anxiety & depression.

Not all anxiety & depression is caused by menopause - but menopause can cause anxiety & depression without any external influences

In some men - some men - (and i agree quite rare) - they can suffer similar symptoms including anxiety & depression; which sometimes can solely be down to the falling levels of testosterone without any external influences.

I am not saying that men suffer from the menopause - all i am saying is that some men suffer from similar symptoms which can be debilitating. And it shouldn't just be classed as a 'mid life crisis' - it appears to be a specific condition

I'm not centering men in the discussion of the menopause - the thread was started to discuss it further after a segment on TV - which is what we are doing.

RoseslnTheHospital · 05/02/2023 18:04

So your answer, Felix, to the thread title question is - no, women cannot have the menopause to themselves, discussion must be had about the supposed male menopause too.

punkofop · 05/02/2023 19:03

Felix125 · 05/02/2023 16:57

MrsMullerBecameABaby
The endocrine system is involved in almost every process in the body and claims that anything related to hormonal changes should be called menopause is utterly inappropriate

I am not saying it is - what i am saying is that the menopause is brought about by falling levels of estrogen & progesterone in a woman's body. This is brought about by physiological changes in the ovaries (such as cell destruction with age)

This then leads to the symptoms which a lot of women suffer from including anxiety & depression.

Not all anxiety & depression is caused by menopause - but menopause can cause anxiety & depression without any external influences

In some men - some men - (and i agree quite rare) - they can suffer similar symptoms including anxiety & depression; which sometimes can solely be down to the falling levels of testosterone without any external influences.

I am not saying that men suffer from the menopause - all i am saying is that some men suffer from similar symptoms which can be debilitating. And it shouldn't just be classed as a 'mid life crisis' - it appears to be a specific condition

I'm not centering men in the discussion of the menopause - the thread was started to discuss it further after a segment on TV - which is what we are doing.

What has rare falling levels of testosterone in men got to do with the menopause?

Felix125 · 05/02/2023 19:47

RoseslnTheHospital
No - I have said several times that men do not get menopause
Its lliterally two paragraphs above

I am saying that they may suffer similar symptoms related to lowered hormone levels

punkofop
What has rare falling levels of testosterone in men got to do with the menopause?

Nothing - but it gives similar symptoms
And if those symptoms are debilitating (such as anxiety & depression) the sufferers should not be ridiculed

RoseslnTheHospital · 05/02/2023 22:35

So because some men may rarely suffer from low testosterone when older/elderly, this must be discussed ad nauseam when women are discussing men inserting themselves into menopause discussions? Because one or two of the symptoms are similar??

Never mind that your first contributions to the thread jumped straight into whataboutery regarding male suicide, depression, etc etc, seizing on this idea of men also suffering some kind of "pause" in middle age as a reason for all their ills. And as a handy stick to beat women with for not caring about men and their issues.

larchforest · 05/02/2023 23:05

According to my dictionary (and I suspect 99.9999999999% of all other dictionaries) the word 'menopause' is a noun, and means the end of menstruation - [Greek: men = month, pausis = cessation].

The menopause starts when your periods stop. There are plenty of other things for men to suffer from, but the male menopause ain't it.

RedAndBlueStripedGolfingUmbrella · 05/02/2023 23:12

I'll be hitting it soon myself, but seriously cannot get worked up over whether there's an equivalent for men - I mean I just don't get the "can't we have anything for ourselves" attitude, it's not a competition!

Floofydawg · 06/02/2023 08:26

RedAndBlueStripedGolfingUmbrella · 05/02/2023 23:12

I'll be hitting it soon myself, but seriously cannot get worked up over whether there's an equivalent for men - I mean I just don't get the "can't we have anything for ourselves" attitude, it's not a competition!

Maybe the fact that you haven't hit it yet is why you're not bothered.

Sindonym · 06/02/2023 08:42

Floofydawg · 06/02/2023 08:26

Maybe the fact that you haven't hit it yet is why you're not bothered.

Show quote history

I thought the same

Hups · 06/02/2023 08:59

What were the chances of this thread descending into a man v woman competition.