Is anyone else afraid of breastfeeding?

[flawless29]

I faced a difficult decision at week 34 of pregnancy, after investing hours researching and thinking about breastfeeding. Initially, I felt strongly that I did not want to breastfeed, which may seem immature, but it was my genuine and honest feeling.

I spoke with my midwife about the benefits of breastfeeding for both me and my baby. Logically this made perfect sense to me. Yet emotionally, thought of breastfeeding made me feel awkward and shy – so much so that I didn't even want anyone else in the room when feeding.

On the other hand, formula-feeding came with its own worries such as not being able to provide the best nutrition for my baby or missing out on certain experiences only available through breastfeeding.

The majority of my family is preoccupied with work or school making it hard for me to discuss this difficult decision with someone close by. Feeling isolated, I wondered if I was too selfish if I decided not to breastfeed and go for formula-milk instead?

It's not selfish at all, it's your choice how you wish to feed your child. What I will say though is I come from a family where no one breastfed. Everyone used formula and I only knew one or two people who breastfed. I had the same worries as you did- feeling exposed, people staring and how would I ever feel comfortable doing it in front of other people. I decided I wanted to do it because I had gd and that increased my risk of diabetes a lot and for the nutritional benefits for ds but I was really nervous about it. So I completely understand where you're coming from.

In the early days, it is easier to do it alone and we reduced our visitors so that I could feed privately. I made myself go to a breastfeeding support group the first week I got home and while I didn't keep going to it, it was a good start for me having somewhere that I could feed ds among other mummies who were doing the same in a variety of ways. It made me feel much more confident that noone batted an eyelid.

When I went out in public I used a scarf to cover myself and ds and when I visited family I used a quiet room in their house to feed him in. I still do this at my in laws because I know fil doesn't know what to do with himself around bf, but now I am so so much more confident. I don't need the scarf any more, I'm more aware of how to dress to suit how covered up I want to be and I have never had anyone look twice at me thankfully. Lots of places now have nursing/ baby change rooms too so you get to learn where those are.

It's 100% your choice how you feed your baby and you need to do what's right for you, but I just wanted to let you know i felt that way and now we're 7 months in to bf and now I really love it and I'd be delighted if we get to the year mark. It's hard especially at the start so I would say that if you want to do it you do need to commit and get the right support in place and know where your nearest La leche league group is or who the lactation consultant in the hospital is. I also had some sessions with a surestart bf support group coordinator before I gave birth so I got lots of info on troubleshooting and how to do it before the time came and I had a lovely midwife who was able to help me get ds latched in hospital. Not pressuring in any way, I was raised on formula and am perfectly healthy but I just wanted you to know you're not alone with those worries and it doesn't mean you can't work it in a way that suits you. Some mums feel really confident bf in public right away but I think a lot take a while to get used to it and some prefer to always feed more privately which is totally fine too. You do what suits you!

I am surprised to see the comments on this post , but many thanks for the encouraging and heartfelt comments ❤️. I already have a baby who is almost 4 months old 👶, and I am breastfeeding him 🍼. I have some difficulty feeding outdoors , otherwise, we both are fine 😊. Thanks a lot 🙏

Your feelings are valid.
so valid.

You should do what you feel is right for you.
I’ll be honest, the thought of whipping my boob out infront of people was not something I felt comfortable about… HOWEVER, after the labour I really lost all sense of bodily embarrassment lol. They saw EVERYTHING.

I breastfeed because, for me, it’s the easier option than making a bottle or expressing (hate hate hate!) for a bottle.
baby won’t touch a bottle now and does not like formula (pukes) so not great if I need to leave baby but it’s fine. I’m happy and baby is thriving.
the pain of breastfeeding initially wears off. I also wear a full cover when we’re out in public if I don’t have something that is discreet enough to get my nip out.

you have to do what’s right for you. trust your body and your own instincts

Just anecdotally but I always have noted that the most colicky babies around me are ff and the more content and settled ones and bf.

Many congratulations on the birth of your baby.