Is anyone else afraid of breastfeeding?

[flawless29]

I faced a difficult decision at week 34 of pregnancy, after investing hours researching and thinking about breastfeeding. Initially, I felt strongly that I did not want to breastfeed, which may seem immature, but it was my genuine and honest feeling.

I spoke with my midwife about the benefits of breastfeeding for both me and my baby. Logically this made perfect sense to me. Yet emotionally, thought of breastfeeding made me feel awkward and shy – so much so that I didn't even want anyone else in the room when feeding.

On the other hand, formula-feeding came with its own worries such as not being able to provide the best nutrition for my baby or missing out on certain experiences only available through breastfeeding.

The majority of my family is preoccupied with work or school making it hard for me to discuss this difficult decision with someone close by. Feeling isolated, I wondered if I was too selfish if I decided not to breastfeed and go for formula-milk instead?

Indeed!

The great thing about breastmilk is because it’s a live substance it’s very good at filtering the crap out for baby meaning you can have alcohol and breast milk is barely effected etc.

Do you think that humans have ‘forever chemicals’ in their breast milk then and that cows manage to avoid it??

The awkwardness and shyness is completely normal, I view idly remember going to brunch with friends and their small kids and taking myself off to feed in the car, it didn't help I have really large breasts anyway so I felt really uncomfortable. It took so long by the time I got back to the table everyone had eaten.

After a few weeks you master it, it's a real skill and feeding under a cover became so easy and that awkward feeling disappeared. Also nobody cares, you realise nobody is watching you.

No. Do YOU think that?

im not saying people shouldn’t breast feed. Just that it’s not the pure, magic elixir the NHS claims it is. There’s no impetus for studies into it because a lot of money has been invested pushing it. It’s just when someone says they’re feeling pressure to breastfeed it’s worth baring in mind that breast milk isn’t perfect.

Also, that link was about a specific town in New York that had chemicals in their drinking water. And that the baby who was breastfed never actually consumed any of the contaminated water directly (which he would have if he was formula fed)

The contaminated water problem obviously doesn’t apply to every woman who breast feeds.

Your forever chemicals in breastmilk claim is basically fake news

It’s a close to perfect as a baby is gonna get. It’s literally designed for them. and using ONE example in NY of a town with contaminated water to claim it isn’t is absolutely ludicrous.

If you're going to give birth to a little person, they do deserve the best your body can provide.
Nothing better than your own, warm milk, perfectly matched to your growing baby's needs and full of antibodies from your own immune system.
If you're feeling shy, then take your time to get practice at home. You'll soon find you can pop the baby under a top discretely for a feed without anyone else even realising.
Please trust your own body. You might need help with getting started (hint: it's all about baby latching on properly and feeding frequently) but there's nothing to compare with the convenience and health benefits to you and your baby.

There is no formula in the world that is better for a baby than breast milk is. That is a fact.

Again, FF is an absolutely valid choice but let’s not lie to ourselves and pretend it’s the same substance with the same benefits as breastmilk. Aside from the fact that it’s factually incorrect it’s pretty offensive to treat grown women like children and tell lies to avoid upsetting them.

That’s why I said there’s plenty of research, but that was a user friendly article. Please feel free to do some of your own research.

However, I will no longer be responding as I believe your username tells me all I need to know about attempting a discussion with you, and you’re jumping on my every statement with zero intent to do your own research. Which is kind of my point about pro-breast feeders.

enjoy your day.

My username is a quote from a book 😂

”Im not winning this argument so I’m flouncing”.

Font come and spout crap about things that aren’t happening. There isn’t ‘plenty of research’ to suggest women who DON’T live in a town with contaminated water have PFAS in their breast milk. There is however research to suggest that cows from anywhere can have PFAS in their breastmilk (which is used to make formula). Don’t scaremonger with fake news, and when challenged post an article that doesn’t even begin to prop up or prove your nonsense

I mean, putting a baby to your breast feels weird the first time but growing a baby in your womb and pushing it out of your vagina (or having it taken out through surgery) is weird too!

Breastmilk has components that support the baby's immune system. If breastmilk was a brand of formula, everyone would buy it!

Breastfeeding reduces your cancer risk and reduces risk of pnd.

However, breastfeeding can also be awful to establish for the first few months. Not always, but sometimes. If the stress is bad enough then it can out balance the positives.

I had one baby where feeding was very hard, tongue tie and needed to combo feed for a while etc. Then second baby just came out and latched on with zero problems.

With both, once feeding was established it felt like a nice g&t on a hot day - relaxing and relieving. Better than faffing with bottles!

I'd say give it a go and do whatever suits you.

Are you talking about microplastics etc? They get into everything, food, water, the world is a toxic place. Breastmilk is one of the least toxic things in it.

Avoiding chemicals by giving your baby mass-produced formula in plastic bottles seems a bit odd? Nothing wrong with formula but it's definitely less eco friendly than bf!

Yes essentially PFAS are things like micro plastics, fabrics, cleaning product elements etc.

Id say breastmilk is probably the
oat resistant substance at source to PFAS because it’s a live substance that filters the crap out.

I don’t mind a healthy debate but scaremongering with total bullshit really just pisses me off

If you were my friend, I’d say at least give it a go. If it’s not for you, switch to formula.

For me, breastfeeding remains one of the best things I remember about having babies.

Well, a lot of posters on this thread have said they didn’t really fancy breastfeeding but then they gave it a try and loved it. Putting yourself through weeks of physical and/or mental pain isn’t really giving it a try - that’s committing to something. Giving it a try is latching the baby on after birth and seeing what happens and how it feels.

Im sorry you had such an awful experience, but, again, many women have a wonderful time breastfeeding - including a lot on this thread who didn’t even plan to do it.

Whilst the New York case of the little boy passed on high levels of PFOA through breast milk is extremely sad and I feel horrific for the family, it's nothing to do with actual breast milk it's to do with a town having chemical contaminated water for years, their water treatment plant was situated several hundred yards away from a manufacturing plant full of toxic chemicals, lack of proper safety testing allowing it to go undetected for years and has caused a mass increase in illnesses and cancers in that town. If he'd had formula bottles made for him they too would of passed on the chemicals. To come on here and say that breast milk passes on forever chemicals based off of that tragic case is scaremongering and fair news at its finest and you should have that comment taken down. Unbelievable honestly.

Fake news*

Contact a lactation consultant as they help new mums with this all the time. Good luck!

How is it not helpful to encourage someone who isn’t sure about what they want to give the option, that may later become unavailable, a try?
If the OP tries breastfeeding first and decides they don’t like it or it doesn’t work best for them (completely valid reasons to stop, by the way) they can move onto bottles.
If the OP gives their baby formula and later decides, whether that’s weeks or months down the line, that they wished they’d breastfed, it won’t be possible (or at least for most who don’t have time/inclination to induce relactation).

It makes sense to try the option that is only available for a limited amount of time before the other option that can always be resorted to.

It sounds very much like you had a bad experience and, whether intentional or not, are projecting that onto the OP.

Do what you need to do? But why not try it for a few days? If you hate it, just stop. But you might be glad you tried.

You are definitely not being selfish or unreasonable in any way , I am pregnant with baby number 5 and I am not breastfeeding if this makes you feel any better, a happy mam makes a happy baby and if your not feeling happy when feeding baby , if you come to dress feeding baby is it even worth it , if you feel happier and you get a more pleasurable experience from formula feeding then I know what I'd choose , but whatever you choose is absolutely fine .x

You should absolutely do what you feel comfortable with- the only thing I'd say is that, if you can breastfeed, it's bloody convenient. No faffing about with bottles in the middle of the night or when you're out and about. If you can get your baby to take breast and bottle (so others can feed him/her too while you're asleep/out) then you're onto a winner- my DD taking both has made my life so much easier.

It' worth giving BF a try. The oxytocin produced during breast feeding is completely addictive and not something I was really aware of. No better feeling in the world ❤️
Not sure what 'shakey evidence' is?
Unless other posters are implying that the nutritional components of breast milk, immuno- protective and developmental factors, including immune cells and stem cells, are not clinically evidenced?

Zombie thread from February - the OP will have had the baby weeks ago

My dc are grown up. When I had them there was a very strong mantra for bf amongst hcps (midwives and hvs) who had had little training and the emphasis was on it being natural, perfect and everyone could do it. They were incapable of providing help or support and things like bf counsellors and cafes did not then exist.

My friends who bf without issue raved about it and criticised ff. They had not on the while suffered badly cracked nipples, mastitis or a breadt abscess.

When ds was 8 weeks I switched to ff. It was so much easier and quicker than what I had been going through and my well being improved exponentially and the baby settled too.

I bf dd for 9 months. It was easier, I had learnt what to do. I had learnt to nod and smile at midwives and hvs. Also she did not have ds's wide, flat palate, identified at his first trip to the dentist when he was 2.

Mothers must do what they are most comfortable with. A happy, well mother is best for baby.

Despite ds being ff and dd bf they both had childhood eczema, bronchiolitis, trouble with their ears, etc. They also both have wide feet, blue eyes and blonde hair along with cracking intellects, a good work ethic and Oxbridge degrees. Some of it's hereditary, some of it's due to nurture. Mostly they just need love.

Do what you feel most comfortable with.