Neighbour outraged I ignored the door

[Scrumbler]

For context I've lived in my home for 6 years, I have a baby and we get on with our neighbours very well usually.

Yesterday someone banged on the door a few times and I ignored it. I never answer my front door because everyone who I'm expecting use the side door. We get a lot of cold callers and religious people who knock alot so I will never answer it.
Today I see my neighbour and his son has a bandage on and I asked what happened, he'd had an accident yesterday in the street, my neighbour said his wife knocked on my door at the time for me to call an ambulance because she's panicked and left her phone in her house so I said I'd heard the knocking but didn't know what it was.
He looked at me completely gone out and then asked me why I'd ignored her. I explained I obviously didn't know it was an emergency or I would have course answered. But he told me I was selfish and slammed his door as he went in.
I carried on taking my shopping out of the car and then his wife comes out asking if I'd ignored her! I told her I don't answer that door and didn't know it was an emergency but she just went mad shouting how horrible that was and asked what kind of person doesn't answer there door.

I know their probably still shook up but I didn't know what had happened.
To clarify, their child seems fine from what the dad told me before he found out I'd ignored the door and turned out to be a very minor injury. I feel awful it happened but I didn't ignore them on purpose knowing they were needing an ambulance so I think they've been a bit over the top.

Not opening the door is a behaviour demonstrated only by mumsnetters. I have never experienced it in real life.

I knocked on a neighbours door when I had a medical emergency and was home alone, I also knocked on many many houses when I lost my cat and thankfully on both occasions people opened their doors!

If looking through a peep hole you would see it is the emergency services and you can also ask who it is without having to open the door.

As someone said about neighbours children. The more we isolate ourselves behind locked doors we are losing the sense of community.
"It takes the whole village to bring up a child"
When you baby is older it will benefit from minor contacts with others.
Get a grip OP be part of your neighbourhood. Join in with the rest of the human race.

You should have answered. Very strange that you didn't

I don't understand these people who claim to 3 or 4 cold callers a day. In a busy suburb, I get them maybe once a fortnight at most, and I just use my standard technique of claiming to be in the middle of a busy online meeting to get rid. The rest of the time it's things like neighbours and parcel deliveries, which I'm perfectly happy to answer the door to, even if it's my neighbour's parcel.

Er, yes they do! We are always getting window companies knock the door. It's always the same patter "We've just done your neighbours windows, and we are back next week doing quotes for your other neighbours, would you like us to give you a quote as well". Also had a Hello Fresh salesman at the door recently. Also plenty of people asking if you could sign up for a monthly charitable donation etc.

So two examples. They clearly don’t come back daily. So can you clarify the 4 folks Turning up every day to sell uou stuff.

total nullshit nonsense

Your not being unreasonable

Answering door or at least checking who is there doesn't have to mean fully opening them, sometimes not even opening at all.
And yeah, I live on deprived estate and always answer unless I am elbow deep in something. You can just look from front window.

But then I can say "no thank you" to a lad selling pillows and knives or JWs without having a breakdown... So that's probably difference. I would also not believe you didn't see who it was and would think you just ignored me

Don't get why you don't answer the door, what about deliveries etc?

It's a bit weird to not even go and see who's at the door. Haven't you got or couldn't you get a peephole/chain/ring doorbell so you can see who it is and then decide whether to answer. Don't you miss parcel deliveries all the time?

OP is coming across as a bit bonkers from her initial post. I can't imagine living like that. IF you are genuinely plagued by religious freaks/cold callers/etc then you use your little optical spy thingy in the door (most doors come with them) or Ring doorbell or CCTV or whatever paranoid people are currently installing. But it shows a massive lack of imagination to ignore the front door 'because everyone I'm expecting knows to come round the side' - literally anything might happen. A passer-by might happen to notice your car is on fire and might not realise you only accept callers at the side door.

You live in a community - I'm appalled by the attitude that basically says 'I am not available to help you' that your ignoring of the front door indicates. I hope I don't live near anyone like you.

Um not an emergency in my mind. He only has a bandage on now. They panicked. She could have called through the letterbox to you. It’s your door and your territory- I don’t answer my door either unless I’m expecting someone. They are rude. No need for drama. Ignore them. 👌

I notice OP hasn't returned to her firestarter of a thread.

Job well done though, @Scrumbler . You've managed to get all the MN oddbods crawling out of the woodwork to regale us with stories of how they NEVER answer the door and if someone is at door, bleeding from the carotid artery and they miss an opportunity to help, well, too bad.

Excellent points, @notacooldad
I think some people want to be recluses when it suits them, but am sure would like others to help in various situations!

You're in your own home. Answer the door or don't answer the door as you see fit.

The level of angst on MN about this completely trivial, unimportant matter is incomprehensible.

You can't use hindsight to dictate whether it was reasonable to believe at the relevant time that it was an emergency.

Are you for real?
We NEVER answer our front door, 1, because no one ever comes round unexpectedly, and 2, because we have an arsehole neighbour who orders stuff for delivery knowing she's out at work all day!

In your favour: you don’t have to answer your door or be answerable to anyone about it.
Not in your favour: repeated louder than normal banging suggests there might be something to investigate, even if you choose not to open the door. Bit odd to have ignored it.

I don't answer the door if, as invariably happens, the only time anyone rings the bell is when I am in the middle of a dump. How is that different? Neighbour was/is being ridiculous.

She only posted it less than 2 hours ago.

Maybe instantaneous responses are not her thing.

Good for you? What’s your point?

But if you go look you might be seen or heard. Then you’d have to maybe answer. So best not to look and risk detection. So it indicates deliberate hiding, as natural inclination should be curiosity , who is banging at the door like that .

so for me this is likely social anxiety or a a risk of bailiffs etc . There is no positive explanation for this behaviour

People are really dramatic on here about people not answering their door. If people hardly ever come to your door other than cold callers then it makes sense, stops you wasting your time, and people are often in the middle of something and don't feel like breaking off. All the "I don't know how you function" comments are way over the top. Obviously just fine, as if it was something they needed, they'd go to the door.

I would go and see who it was if someone was banging repeatedly because that would seem unusual for a cold caller.

But YANBU, I suspect they were just stressed out due to what happened. Or perhaps they're MN users and are oddly offended by the idea of people not answering their doors.

Odd to go banging on a neighbour's door really, would have thought it would be quicker to run back into your own house to grab phone and first aid kit.

YANBU to not answer your front door and use your side door, it's your house. But I think if someone was hammering on the door I'd try to go see what it was. Unless I'd just fed the baby to sleep in my arms of course, nothing would have moved me at that point.