Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Neighbour outraged I ignored the door

1000 replies

Scrumbler · 01/02/2023 12:18

For context I've lived in my home for 6 years, I have a baby and we get on with our neighbours very well usually.

Yesterday someone banged on the door a few times and I ignored it. I never answer my front door because everyone who I'm expecting use the side door. We get a lot of cold callers and religious people who knock alot so I will never answer it.
Today I see my neighbour and his son has a bandage on and I asked what happened, he'd had an accident yesterday in the street, my neighbour said his wife knocked on my door at the time for me to call an ambulance because she's panicked and left her phone in her house so I said I'd heard the knocking but didn't know what it was.
He looked at me completely gone out and then asked me why I'd ignored her. I explained I obviously didn't know it was an emergency or I would have course answered. But he told me I was selfish and slammed his door as he went in.
I carried on taking my shopping out of the car and then his wife comes out asking if I'd ignored her! I told her I don't answer that door and didn't know it was an emergency but she just went mad shouting how horrible that was and asked what kind of person doesn't answer there door.

I know their probably still shook up but I didn't know what had happened.
To clarify, their child seems fine from what the dad told me before he found out I'd ignored the door and turned out to be a very minor injury. I feel awful it happened but I didn't ignore them on purpose knowing they were needing an ambulance so I think they've been a bit over the top.

OP posts:
ZeldaWillTellYourFortune · 02/02/2023 22:56

Tinktravels · 01/02/2023 12:34

Yabu not to answer the door to anyone. I've never understood this on Mumsnet. If it's a cold caller it's not hard to say not interested thanks.

It's got zero to do with whoever might be on the other side of the door.

It's about disrupting my time, my energy, my train of thought, my privacy. If I'm home, I am either sleeping or doing something that I prioritize over flinging open the door at everyone else's convenience.

Girlgift97 · 02/02/2023 22:56

Rollingaroundinmud · 02/02/2023 22:53

“Girlgift97” You sound very awkward I am guessing this has happened to you.

Guess what has happened to me? Someone not answering the door, not in my recollection, but I've not knocked on many doors?

I'm not awkward at all! Although that's one of the nicer things I've been called tonight by the "lovely and empathetic" we don't ever answer the door brigade.

youshouldnthaveasked · 02/02/2023 22:57

WomanStanleyWoman2 · 02/02/2023 22:50

@Rollingaroundinmud no mention of baby in OP? Just she doesn't answer the door?

It’s literally in the first line of the opening post.

😂Observant? Nope 👎

ZeldaWillTellYourFortune · 02/02/2023 22:58

BentleyRhythmAce · 01/02/2023 12:41

Well, perhaps you'll need help in an emergency one day and no one will open their door to you.

Oh, this tired old trope can do one.

I'll take my chances, thanks. It's worked for decades so far.

Aby543 · 02/02/2023 22:59

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

Ihaveateenager · 02/02/2023 23:00

@BumpySkull “But I’m sure that OP would find a way it was the police’s fault if she got killed or injured.”

😂I am pretty sure that the OP will not be able to find a way to blame the police if she was killed.
Thanks for the laugh…

MoreSleepPleasee · 02/02/2023 23:00

I don't answer my door unless I'm expecting anyone most of the time. If you weren't invited and I'm not in the mood for company you're not coming in.

Girlgift97 · 02/02/2023 23:00

WomanStanleyWoman2 · 02/02/2023 22:50

@Rollingaroundinmud no mention of baby in OP? Just she doesn't answer the door?

It’s literally in the first line of the opening post.

Sorry no mention as to the fact that the baby means she doesn't answer the door..... the reason was "I just don't"

Then it's because she couldn't leave the dog with the baby in later posts, because she was in the living room and would have to put the dog in the kitchen.

The main reason in the first post, is just because I don't answer the front door.

LoveLifeBeHappy · 02/02/2023 23:03

Girlgift97 · 02/02/2023 18:07

Fair enough, might want to rethink that in case someone is calling you to say one of your nearest and dearest is in an accident!

But hey ho it's your phone and your right to block and report as spam,

I'm glad I answered the door at 2am to the police that told us our son had suffered a potentially catastrophic head injury (turned out fine).

But we're all different.... thank god!

Show quote history

Yes, we are all different. There is absolutely nothing to rethink, who would knock on your door at 2am?

People have mobile phones, they can call, text or WhatsApp you. Was your son alone when he got injured?

Girlgift97 · 02/02/2023 23:06

@LoveLifeBeHappy yes he was, got off the bus after a night out, literally across the road from his flat...

Girlgift97 · 02/02/2023 23:07

@LoveLifeBeHappy the previous poster stated she ignores calls she doesn't know the number of, then blocks and reports them as spam......

mathanxiety · 02/02/2023 23:12

Honestly - what is this 'I never answer the door' thing? It's posted here as if it were the only natural thing

Tell cold callers to fuck off, ditto religious freaks.

It's really unreasonable to make not ope ing your door into a principle. It's not neighbourly. It makes your neighbourhood a place where every house is a little semi detached fortress.

Rollingaroundinmud · 02/02/2023 23:14

Girlgift97 · 02/02/2023 23:07

@LoveLifeBeHappy the previous poster stated she ignores calls she doesn't know the number of, then blocks and reports them as spam......

I understand where you are coming from your son is very lucky to be alive. You got a knock that you never expected.

I understand you and the op so I will leave it at that.

FieldsOfRoses · 02/02/2023 23:16

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Hoplesscynic · 02/02/2023 23:23

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

This ^ 😂
For the record, I also often choose to NOT ANSWER (how dare I ?!) the door to random knocks.
9/10 it's cold callers or deliveries for neighbours and I CBA. How selfish, eh?
And if someone was banging that would make me even more reluctant, especially as I don't have a peephole to check who it is.

Pennyfin81 · 02/02/2023 23:25

Cariadm · 02/02/2023 20:02

In this instance it seems that the child wasn't too badly injured and maybe wanting to ask you to ring for an ambulance might, in retrospect, appear to have been a little OTT? 🤔However for all you knew it could so easily have been otherwise because, for some bizarre and completely left field reason, you wouldn't ANSWER THE BLOODY DOOR!!!! 😏
The child could have been run over and desperately in need of medical attention but hey, you don't want to be bothered by a few 'cold calls' or as you called them 'religious people' so you just stayed in your bubble and didn't give a moment's thought to any other possibility?!! 🙄
You said and I quote: "I explained I obviously didn't know it was an emergency or I would have course answered." HOW can you judge if something is an 'emergency' if you don't EVEN LOOK?! 🤔
You should come down off your high horse, apologise to your neighbours and tell them you're glad their child is OK...Stop trying to justify your odd and insular behaviour, you're trying to defend the indefensible!! 😡

This is what insanity sounds like. "If you don't stop what you are doing and answer the door my child could have been seriously injured". ITS NOT HER RESPONSIBILITY TO LOOK AFTER HER NEIGHBOURS CHILD. ITS NOT HER RESPONSIBILITY TO MAKE UP FOR THE NEIGHBOURS INABILITY TO CARE FOR THEIR CHILDREN. AND ITS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS WHETHER SHE OPENS THE DOOR OR NOT.
If I'm working I'm not answering the door unless I feel like it. If the neighbours are trying to reach me then that's a shame but still not my problem. The entitlement is unreal.

WomanStanleyWoman2 · 02/02/2023 23:35

mathanxiety · 02/02/2023 23:12

Honestly - what is this 'I never answer the door' thing? It's posted here as if it were the only natural thing

Tell cold callers to fuck off, ditto religious freaks.

It's really unreasonable to make not ope ing your door into a principle. It's not neighbourly. It makes your neighbourhood a place where every house is a little semi detached fortress.

To quote Jerry Seinfeld: “The very fact that you’re opposed to this makes me think I’m onto something”.

DaSilvaP · 02/02/2023 23:39

SnarkyBag · 01/02/2023 12:31

I have no time or understanding for people who have a generic “I don’t answer my door if it’s not pre planned or it’s the wrong door” just bloody answer it!

Just bloody keep away from my door if you haven't been invited.

SouperNoodle · 02/02/2023 23:48

ZeroFuchsGiven · 01/02/2023 12:33

I just cant get my head around the no door answering and no phone answering brigade. I dont know anyone in real life who think like this, its really weird

Same. If someone is at my door, I answer it.
If my phone rings, I answer it.
I thought that was normal Confused

asleeponthetable · 03/02/2023 00:00

They called an ambulance for a possible broken bone, they’re being unreasonable.

Ellyesse · 03/02/2023 00:03

BurntOutGirl · 01/02/2023 12:27

Surely going back in their own home for the phone would be quicker then repeatedly banging on yours

Agreed.
What was the child doing playing on the road unsupervised anyway?

Rollingaroundinmud · 03/02/2023 00:10

I would have booked a taxi and go straight to A&E not banging down the door of my neighbour. Expecting them to ring an ambulance and then blame them after when they don’t answer. The NHS is stretched enough get a taxi not an ambulance.

Ellyesse · 03/02/2023 00:10

Pennyfin81 · 02/02/2023 23:25

This is what insanity sounds like. "If you don't stop what you are doing and answer the door my child could have been seriously injured". ITS NOT HER RESPONSIBILITY TO LOOK AFTER HER NEIGHBOURS CHILD. ITS NOT HER RESPONSIBILITY TO MAKE UP FOR THE NEIGHBOURS INABILITY TO CARE FOR THEIR CHILDREN. AND ITS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS WHETHER SHE OPENS THE DOOR OR NOT.
If I'm working I'm not answering the door unless I feel like it. If the neighbours are trying to reach me then that's a shame but still not my problem. The entitlement is unreal.

Show quote history

Pennyfin81 is right!
I can’t believe how illogical some people are! They seem to expect people be on hand all the time to run to the door or phone. They must live lives where they don’t have anything important to do.

Buffs · 03/02/2023 00:51

YANBU. You are under absolutely no obligation to answer your front door.

Pants0nFir3 · 03/02/2023 01:21

Well, where do I begin. From personal experience, you have and did nothing wrong. There is no law that has to make you answer your front door to a poxy neighbour. It would appear that you live next to drama queens, albeit 'we own the status quo, dontcha know' bastards. Slamming doors, crappy behaviour, I mean, their child is their fucking responsibility and not yours! Why couldn't the fucking twatty parents call the ambulance? Think about it...they're god damn nut jobs.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In
This thread is not accepting new messages.
Swipe left for the next trending thread