WIBU to have asked for a favour?

[NothingOnTopButABucketAndAMop]

My car failed it’s MOT on Tuesday, I could not afford the repairs so it’s off the road basically.
I don’t go many places anyway but I did need shopping so I messaged a friend telling her my car was off the road and could she take us shopping sometime this weekend.
Initially she said she would then a few hours later (when her husband got home if that means anything!) she messaged back saying actually she had too much on. It would have taken her an hour and a half max.
Now I’m thinking WIBU to have even asked at all??!

What!!

I was going to say yanbu as friends should help each other out but that's on the basis that she lives close by and it wouldn't really be putting her out.

You're asking her to take 90mins out of her time before you even do your shopping! YABU! Do an online shop or get a taxi

Our Tesco delivery fee is £2.

If the lack of car is going to be a long term thing, I'd research monthly saver delivery passes. I think we pay about a fiver a month for unlimited deliveries from Tesco Tue- Thu.

Even if you do get back on the road, by the time you factor in cost of petrol your own not someone else's and wear and tear on the car plus time, the delivery is the better option for us.

Surely you can afford the £5 given that you haven't driven your car since Tuesday

It was fine for you to ask, and fine for her to say no. Simple as that

Would it really add a fiver if you picked a middle of the week delivery slot?

OP, you are in serious CF territory. My friends and I do favours for one another all the time, but they don't involve making a long round trip and then waiting while I do my shopping. If you have health problems which prevent you from walking 15 minutes to the nearest shop and can't afford supermarket deliveries, why did you decide to live in such an inconvenient location? I also think you wouldn't have been offering petrol money.

So 45 mins to get from hers to Tesco with you, 45 mins back, and most people are in the shop for a good hour plus depending on how big of a shop. She wasn't unreasonable to say she didn't have time. Her husband might have reminded her that they had this and that on and she couldn't fit it in.

Could you not book a home delivery?

My last two online shops cost 0 delivery Ocado and £1 Asda. Pick your time, or get a flexible slot, look out for offers - in fact if you're new to online groceries you can probably get £20 or so off your shop introductory offer.
You need to look into it properly OP not just makes excuses.

Delivery would add at least £5 to my shopping which I can’t really afford

Weren’t you going to give your friend anything to cover her petrol let alone time?! You are increasingly sounding like a complete pisstaker!

It would have been easier to have had some groceries delivered, or to have got a taxi. Asking someone to help, would, for me, be the absolute last resort

But you’d be paying her fuel costs, which may be £5 anyway, and wouldn’t you also offer to buy her a coffee and cake as a thank you too? So more than £5 delivery cost.

Tesco do Flexi saver slots which can cost as little as £1 (if you avoid weekends). It means you get a 4 hour slot instead of a 1 hour slot but since you say you don't go out much this shouldn't be an issue.

I would take a friend who asked, but I'd be more than a little resentful if they expected me to do 1.5 hours driving for it.

But all that excess driving would cost your friend more than £5, which I presume you’d cover anyway?

o..

Can you ring the local shop and ask them if they could drop you down some groceries? If they're a 15 min walk and you can't walk well they're likely to be v close.

I mean cake is a bit much but yeah petrol and maybe a coffee?

That was a massive ask, as is expecting her to pay for the privilege of taking hours out of her weekend to help you out with something that you could easily do online.

Look at all the supermarkets, work out which is cheaper for delivery, sometimes they do free delivery on your first shop so it's worth looking at that, also look at the flexible slots too, they are often massively cheaper.

It sounds like you can't afford to get your car on the road anytime soon, so you're going to have to figure out how to do shopping without relying in anyone else.

I think what you were asking was a bit much and I can understand why she said no. Is there no one who lives closer to you that you could tag along with at the same time they would be shopping anyway? This is what I used to do before I had a car and I’d offer petrol money. Recently my car broke down and I asked a friend to take me to pick up my click and collect order. But she lives just down the road and the shop is 10 mins away so it only took about half an hour. So maybe something like that would be possible or just book a delivery.

But fine for her to incur the cost of the extra fuel use? YABVVVU, cheeky and entitled to ask. Just because someone has a car doesn't make them your skivvy. Pay for an online order FGS.

So over two hours in total, plus petrol costs.

I think you were a bit cheeky, yes. It’d be different if they lived in the next street.

Yeah I think she lives a bit far away for this to be reasonable.

I mean it’s sort of fine to ask, but also you must accept no for an answer. Otherwise that is unreasonable.

I initially didn't think you were being unreasonable to ask and she is perfectly reasonable to say no if you can't, doesn't have time, doesn't want to etc.
But then I saw she would have to drive 30 mins to yours (later corrected to 20 mins...) plus 15 mins to Tesco - so between 1 hr 10 mins and 1 hr 30 mins driving.
Plus hanging around at Tesco while you shop.
You say you can't afford a 5 quid delivery charge so I am assuming you had no intention of offering her petrol money.
You say in your OP that you can't afford the repairs to the car so does that mean you won't be getting it repaired? I suspect your friend had a chat with her husband and one or both of them pointed out that it might be better not to set a precedent by giving you a lift this time as it could become a regular thing.
You're going to need to sort out how to get your shopping if you don't have a car and that means another solution than asking a friend.

Time at the weekends is precious. Although its ok to ask thats actually a huge chunk of time when you could pay a couple of pounds to get it delivered.

Online shopping doesn’t really cost any more once you factor in petrol or bus fare to get there. And as pp said you can get £1 slots. A £5 slot is quite an extremely busy slot, like prime weekend time, and only some supermarkets would charge this much