Was I Unreasonable - wheelchair Space

[Nicetomeetyou25]

Hi, My DC ( 10 ) is a wheelchair user, we have to take public transport to school and honestly where we live is a nightmare. Some of the London buses still have a very small area where wheelchairs and pushchairs can go. I know else where there is no priority but on London buses it is stated very clearly wheelchairs are priority and pushchair need to be prepared to fold. School runs can be crazy because there tends to be a lot of pushchairs. I never ask a pushchair to get off and always wait for a bus that we can fit on. Every day a particular school mum beats me to the bus stop and she really does make sure she stands in the correct place to get on first and I usually allow this.

yesterday I could not be late home so I collected DC a tiny bit early and took them to the bus stop before the school bus stop. Got on bus and we arrived at the bus stop with usual pram getting on ( I should have added that she has a double stroller )

I had placed DC in the correct wheelchair position so sideways with back against the wall where stairs are as it is how the buses even say you have to.
she asks me to turn DC around so there was more space for her to get in side by side. I refused. She said she didn’t understand why I wouldn’t. I explained that I wasn’t willing to change position as it wasn’t safe.
She goes to bus driver and kicks off to advice him that there was enough space of I just turned the wheelchair around and placed it behind the pole.
she got off in a bit of a strop and called me selfish.
was I being unreasonable ?

Why did you turn it round? I'd have kept it in the safe position

Sorry think there was a type - I refused to turn the chair around.

No, you absolutely weren’t. And I’m surprised people with buggies don’t give you more priority. If a wheelchair user needs the space, I get off or wait because holding a wriggly DS and folding or unfolding a buggy one handed while juggling bags etc would be a nightmare. It’s very obviously wheelchairs first, buggies second, and if I need to get on and there are people standing in the space as there often are I have no trouble pointing this out to them. Did the bus driver back you up?

She goes to bus driver and kicks off to advice him that there was enough space of I just turned the wheelchair around and placed it behind the pole ah no my bad I mis read that bit.

You're good. She's an idiot who doesn't understand. Presumably the driver backed you up?

No you were not unreasonable.

You are unreasonable for not standing your ground/taking priority or going to the bus stop before hers every day.

She's an entitled cf.

Who in their right mind has the cheek to ask a wheelchair user to turn around.

I often use the bus with my pushchair OP and I would leave you to it, it’s hard enough using a wheelchair in the UK sometimes.

Infact one thing I have learnt since having to get a pushchair on public transport, up shitty pavements, in pokey toilets and in out of order lifts, is that it must be extra hard to someone who has no choice in a wheelchair.

You should be getting to use the priority space for the wheelchair every day (unless another wheelchair user is already there of course),

She shouldn't have to go to the bus stop before everyday.

Bet she goes to the earlier bus stop next time

You should be insisting your son get priority everyday. And the driver should be backing you up. I know it's hard to do though.

Then she'll have to get off when OP wants to get on

You did nothing wrong. Its a wheelchair space.

Maybe the school could send out a reminder?

I know but because her kids are in the younger classes they get our the gate quicker 🤣🤣

She sounds like a horror. I wish I'd have been on the bus. I'd have had a word with her.

Did the bus driver back you up OP?

As PP has said, when I used a pushchair it opened my eyes to just how difficult things must be for someone who has no choice but to use a wheelchair- there's no way I would take the space every day, let alone ask you to move if you were already there!

The pushchair woman is a total CF

Why doesn’t he have a personal travel budget? This would provide more appropriate transport to and from school everyday, it would also mean more hanging around at the bus stop or worry about being able to get on.

That’s irrelevant, she still needs to vacate the wheelchair space to allow you to properly secure your daughter there.

The bus driver did in this case as I was already on the bus. They don’t usually if I’m not on the bus and asking for the space, which is why I don’t bother arguing. A single stroller would fit with us in the right position but our area is really hard to navigate with a wheelchair. Like even when the bus driver puts the ramp down first so doesn’t open the doors straight away whilst it’s coming down people crowd in front of us and then run down the ramp to escape 🤣 no one can just wait !!

Why is this something the school needs to get involved with? It's nothing to do with the school. No wonder teachers are striking when people expect them to solve every single issue!

I would have moved so there was space for you both. Give and take

@Simonjt because she isn’t allowed on the bus they provide and getting taxi allowance is hard unless you live a certain distance from the school.

She needs to get off for you then.

That space is priority for wheelchair users. The bus driver should have had training on this.

Do check this again op, there is a common misconception that distance matters for SEND transport. If it's the nearest appropriate school it can be anywhere. Your local sendiass might help.

The bus drivers can be rubbish on this front. I’ve been refused on with my buggy lots of times because people are standing in the space and the bus driver doesn’t want to ask them to move. Luckily, I’m prepared to do it myself, but if not I’d have been left standing in the rain and cold lots of times! I would hope they’d pull their finger out for a wheelchair user but I don’t know.

Uploaded this to explain why I didn’t move
so this is similar to our bus.
where the wheelchair is shown is where it’s meant to be. She wanted me to turn it around so that she was like what the kid hair in the photo is.