To not want other people using our caravan?

[Serialcatmum]

Ok, by other people I mean my sister in law.

We recently purchased a caravan, we were going to go for a smaller one but decided to treat ourselves to a bigger one to give us more space. When I told SIL she said “oh I had my fingers crossed you’d go for the bigger one as then we can maybe use it some weekends too?!” It was sort of a question, sort of a statement. I laughed and said “oh we’ve not even planned our first trip yet”. She just said “ha ha. I don’t mean next weekend, I mean in the summer”. I laughed and changed the topic.

Since then DBIL has messaged my DH saying that SIL mentioned we might we able to borrow the caravan sometime.. (DH didn’t reply)

They don’t even have a towing vehicle. So are they planning on taking our car too?! Or are we expected to drive to their holiday place of choice and set up / collect for them?!

ANBH - they should get their own caravan and stop being cheeky fs.

ABU- they are family, of course you should let them take your caravan (and car) for a jolly.

We always intended to buy a campervan, but there was no way I'd lend it out to anyone. So last year we decided to buy a static mainly because it's in a great area but also so the whole family can get the use of it. It makes me feel good that they can get away when they maybe couldn't afford it otherwise. It wasn't hugely expensive but at least this helps justify the site fees when it isn't lying empty.

I agree they need to chill the bloody hell out and let you at least have a holiday in it first BUT why wouldn’t you want your sister to borrow it? If you’re close I presume? And if she couldn’t afford something as luxurious as that?

As others have said
They not easy to tow, even when you know what your doing
They dont have a car that could tow it
They expensive to fix if damaged and fragile
Insurance
and on the CF assumption they getting to use it, never assume, i would say no on that alone - its rude to think they just get to use it cos they family. Do people just assume they can use anothers car whenever?

I grew up caravanning as a child - there is so much that goes into it. Learning how to attach the Caravan to the tow bar, getting used to towing the van on all types of roads. Getting to the site, parking and setting up properly, getting the chemicals right in the toilet and emptying this properly. Connecting water and electricity properly. Adding the awning, transitioning from day to night each day.

Is no way I would ask to borrow someone else's van and risk doing things 'wrong' - everyone has their way of setting stuff up and closing stuff down. It is like a snails shell - not really designed to be shared.

It is the sort of people who ask to borrow equipment of this kind that are the last people you should lend it to. They clearly have no idea what is involved. I bet they would end up bringing home a full sewage tank in the bathroom etc.

The story about someone wanting to holiday on someone else's boat astounds me.

We had a camper during lockdown, had countless requests to borrow from family and friends, even one from a neighbour.
Flat NO, didn't give a reason, just no. Requests stopped.

Tell them, “Sorry but this isn’t going to be a caravan bought for other people to borrow. You need to think of it as our home, not a holiday lettings caravan.”

Cheeky sod.

We have the same with our VW campervan, everyone seems to think it's an op for a free holiday plus we have the added hassle of insurance, mileage, wear and tear, deisel, how things work such as turning the gas on, diesel heater, water, electrics, leisure battery, pop top etc.
Just say no, firmly or you'll have every CF wanting a free holiday

You do realise it has to be TOWED and her sister doesn't have a car that can tow it. I'm sure some people on here are still assuming it's a static and/or have no idea what a touring caravan involves re emptying the toilet, filling with water etc.

I'm glad your dh has sent that message and had a reply.

If you are anything like my parents, they have their caravan set up with how they want things stored etc and I don't think they'd be happy if someone borrowed it and things weren't put back where they are meant to be.
I hope you hear no more from them about it (though I would personally expect to see some low pa posts or messages about not being able to take the kids away etc,) and have a wonderful time in your new to you caravan 😊

These people are adults…..not toddlers asking to borrow a caravan for the weekend….

I wouldn't assume adults would know those things or be able to tow a large caravan. They don't even have the vehicle never mind the skills.

I think we paid something like £1500 on ebay but can't remember exactly. It is an enormous one, about the biggest you can get to tow so people can use them to live in on building sites etc. I don't know if that makes it more expensive than smaller ones, or cheaper because it's less easy to manoeuvre and some places won't allow them.

OP if they ask again a simple No Thank You as a reply will do you do not owe anyone regardless if they are family any justification of anything you own. Being family is not an entitlement.

cue some snippy comment from DH that only he is able to drive a proper lorry (he is a lorry driver!!

I don’t get that-why did your DH make the snippy comment about being a lorry driver?

because he can reverse and mov large vehicles?

I think OP meant that DB replied snippily saying he was a lorry driver (meaning “lend me the frigging caravan, I am a CF having another go at demanding this”) and her DH then just responded with a cheery thumbs up!

Well played OP and DH.

OFGS!

Yes the OP might crash it, but that's nothing like someone else crashing your thing!

You don't ask to borrow a touring caravan

DH should text back "Looks like the wires got crossed, we've no plans for that"

Bloody hell! I'd be lethal towing a caravan!

I'm close to my sister and I also have a much newer, bigger and more expensive car than she does. Doesn't mean I'm going to let her borrow it whenever she fancies it.

Suggest to SiL and bil that as they're that keen, you could split all the costs ie purchase, insurance, maintenance, fitting out etc and treat it like a time share 😁

You need to be blunt. Everyone that knows me, knows not to even ask to borrow our caravan. It’s an exceptionally personal space. I don’t want people sleeping in my bed for starters. Plus we keep things in there that I don’t necessarily want to share with others. They won’t know how to use it or operate things if they’re not caravaners. Imagine if they damage it while towing or crash it. That’s your insurance your claiming on. Or they break the blinds or the toilet cassette. There are so many reasons why you don’t let anyone use your caravan.

If you don’t want to be blunt with them, just tell them that the insurance only covers it for your use. So whether they had an accident whilst towing or damaged it through use or it got stolen off their pitch etc.

You'll live to regret it if you cave in.

YANBU

Well done op.stop it before it starts!
Because this would become their yearly thing...or more.

Is it a caravan of a caravan caravan.sounds swish!

Tell them the insurance only covers for people using it who are named on the policy. I.e yourself and you'd have to be staying in it for it to be insured.