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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

How can she be left like this? Take her back to A&E?

703 replies

Fearsheisdying · 23/01/2023 17:51

Posting for traffic has honestly I'm terrified something is seriously wrong with my Mum and don't know what to do so please be nice.

Last week she started with some pain that she says feels like it's right at the very bottom of her ribs and radiating round the sides. She was in agony, basically screaming with pain so I took her to A&E on the advice of 111. All obs and ECG were normal but the blood tests were abnormal. They were going to do a CT scan but then decided as her obs were ok and they didn't think there was a bleed as no fall/injury, they were not going to do a CT scan there but would refer it to the GP to arrange BUT because of the blood test results and recent weightloss, they wanted it done urgently under the "2 week rule" and from his grave tone, I highly suspect he thinks it's cancer and serious. They couldn't/wouldn't give her anymore painkillers because of the painkillers she's on for severe arthritis but these are not touching the pain.

Fast forward to today, she has been in absolute agony since Thursday and seems worse today and can barely move. She's exhausted and crying/screaming in pain. My sister called 999 today but they said as not life threatening they won't send an ambulance but had to speak to GP within an hour. GP receptionist tried to say no appointments so we couldn't speak to GP but after I explained the issue (and she could hear my Mum crying out in pain) she finally agreed to pass a message to the GP so currently waiting to see if GP will call back today or not. Mum says if I take her back to A&E we'll be sat for hours again and nothing will be done but I can't just sit here and watch her in so much pain and do nothing.

What do I do?! Do I make her let me take her to A&E? Do we wait to see if the GP will call? Just feel so helpless

OP posts:
Fearsheisdying · 16/02/2023 11:34

Mum is still not allowed home just yet. She has a slight UTI from the catheter but the Dr seems to think this shouldn't be the cause of her markers being so high. Another sit and wait scenario I'm afraid while we wait further tests. After the clear colonoscopy though, I'm not too worried, just sad for her as she is so fed up and just wants out

OP posts:
Nimbostratus100 · 16/02/2023 11:35

is she feeling better? Has the pain gone?

Fearsheisdying · 16/02/2023 11:39

She said she's had no pain for about 5 days now, not sure I believe her fully but there is definitely a marked improvement. I am testing negative now and feeling much better so will hopefully be able to see her later

OP posts:
Nimbostratus100 · 16/02/2023 12:07

good news, I am glad for you both x

LookItsMeAgain · 16/02/2023 12:08

Fearsheisdying · 16/02/2023 11:39

She said she's had no pain for about 5 days now, not sure I believe her fully but there is definitely a marked improvement. I am testing negative now and feeling much better so will hopefully be able to see her later

That's brilliant news (that you're now Covid- ) so you'll be able to visit her. I'm relieved that they didn't find anything after doing the colonoscopy. Whatever that blockage was, is most likely the cause of the pain, if you think about it. It took more than one or two Kleerprep (not sure if that's how you spell it) to clear out her system and if was a genuine blockage, it was going to take some shifting to clear it out. This would naturally cause her pain.

I hope she can be discharged in the next day or so and she can get back to her own bed and her own comforts, and that you can relax now knowing she is safely back home in the best health she can be!

sueelleker · 16/02/2023 15:02

LookItsMeAgain; it's "Klean-Prep".

OutofEverything · 16/02/2023 15:57

She may be telling the truth about no pain. A faecal block like she had is very painful, removing that would remove the pain.

Fearsheisdying · 16/02/2023 18:31

The Dr has said the antibiotics are not working and her markers are still too high. Trying some stronger antibiotics but she won't be out this week. They're getting other specialists involved to look and see if they can find out what's causing it. I know she's in the best place but this feels never bloody ending

OP posts:
Nimbostratus100 · 16/02/2023 18:33

at least she is not in so much pain now, thats one good thing

OutofEverything · 16/02/2023 19:06

@Fearsheisdying If she has a more unusual infection it can take a bit of time to get it under control. Frustrating I know, but hopefully she will be back to normal in time.

EmptyEnvelope · 16/02/2023 19:37

This must be so stressful for you and your family. I’m sorry you’re all going through it

Yb23487643 · 16/02/2023 19:50

I’d trust them and ask all the questions you have. They won’t keep your Mum in longer than they have to and tend to discharge early where possible.
There are many infectious and non infectious causes of a raised CRP, sounds like they’re looking into it which is what you’d want even though it can take a while.
The colonoscopy can only see inside that tube and there’s lots of other things in an abdomen and they’re pretty moveable so I’m different positions if lying on your back or side etc.
It sounds not straight forward so they’re seeking other input & taking it all seriously. I hope it’s an infection that clears quickly with antibiotics that work (they will have cultured the urine to see which bugs and which antibiotics it’s sensitive to but can take a few days).
But definitely ask questions if you’re concerned or don’t follow their processes/thinking - it’s better than worrying xx

Fifi00 · 16/02/2023 20:11

Fearsheisdying · 16/02/2023 18:31

The Dr has said the antibiotics are not working and her markers are still too high. Trying some stronger antibiotics but she won't be out this week. They're getting other specialists involved to look and see if they can find out what's causing it. I know she's in the best place but this feels never bloody ending

This is good news they are trying to figure out what's wrong with your mum so she doesn't face another admission if they discharge her now.. Usually they turf people out as quickly as possible.

OldFan · 17/02/2023 01:05

Such a relief about the scan @Fearsheisdying . Praying everything gets sorted out soon. x

LookItsMeAgain · 17/02/2023 09:24

Thanks @sueelleker .

@Fearsheisdying - They can get antibiotics into your mum quicker (by drip) and under observation than by sending her home with some pills. Better to send her home recovered than still with an underlying issue that will mean she has to be sent back in again to get better.

It's only a few more days (I hope). Sending you lots of support and socially distanced hugs. Hope your mum manages to turn that corner soon.

Fearsheisdying · 17/02/2023 19:22

The best update - she's home!! She called me at lunchtime to tell me she was being discharged so I was able to leave work and get her. Some follow ups that need to be done and some oral antibiotics but other than that, she's all good.

OP posts:
Crumpetdisappointment · 17/02/2023 19:24

what a relief,
very good news
Flowers

ghettihead · 17/02/2023 19:25

I've been following your mum's story. Fantastic news 😁

2018SoFarSoGreat · 17/02/2023 19:28

@Fearsheisdying I'm so happy for you all! I've been worried about your mum and @MyCake's DH. It's a better day today for some of us, and hope that continues ❤️

LulooLemon · 17/02/2023 19:30

Thanks for that lovely update. Wishing her well in the coming week.

Orchidflower1 · 17/02/2023 19:32

Oh @Fearsheisdying and @2018SoFarSoGreat so thankful that both you have had positive developments with your relatives. Thinking of you both- followed both your stories. Praying for continued good health for your loved ones. Xx

Englishash · 17/02/2023 19:34

That's brilliant news ! Delighted for you all after the very rough trot you've all had !

rainbowstardrops · 17/02/2023 19:38

Great news!

CrunchyCarrot · 17/02/2023 20:07

Very happy to hear this news! You must both be incredibly relieved and never want to see a hospital again!

Cakeyface123 · 17/02/2023 20:26

aww yippeeeee!!! Great news OP! X