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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

How can she be left like this? Take her back to A&E?

703 replies

Fearsheisdying · 23/01/2023 17:51

Posting for traffic has honestly I'm terrified something is seriously wrong with my Mum and don't know what to do so please be nice.

Last week she started with some pain that she says feels like it's right at the very bottom of her ribs and radiating round the sides. She was in agony, basically screaming with pain so I took her to A&E on the advice of 111. All obs and ECG were normal but the blood tests were abnormal. They were going to do a CT scan but then decided as her obs were ok and they didn't think there was a bleed as no fall/injury, they were not going to do a CT scan there but would refer it to the GP to arrange BUT because of the blood test results and recent weightloss, they wanted it done urgently under the "2 week rule" and from his grave tone, I highly suspect he thinks it's cancer and serious. They couldn't/wouldn't give her anymore painkillers because of the painkillers she's on for severe arthritis but these are not touching the pain.

Fast forward to today, she has been in absolute agony since Thursday and seems worse today and can barely move. She's exhausted and crying/screaming in pain. My sister called 999 today but they said as not life threatening they won't send an ambulance but had to speak to GP within an hour. GP receptionist tried to say no appointments so we couldn't speak to GP but after I explained the issue (and she could hear my Mum crying out in pain) she finally agreed to pass a message to the GP so currently waiting to see if GP will call back today or not. Mum says if I take her back to A&E we'll be sat for hours again and nothing will be done but I can't just sit here and watch her in so much pain and do nothing.

What do I do?! Do I make her let me take her to A&E? Do we wait to see if the GP will call? Just feel so helpless

OP posts:
Twentyfirstcenturymumma · 14/02/2023 13:10

SeaToSki · 14/02/2023 12:42

My top tips for getting through covid are 5 days of high dose zinc and vit d then taper down over the next 5 days. High dose vit c for all 10 days. If you get coughy then try a cough medicine with guafenisin in it.

it got my elderly parents through with just some tiredness and a bit of a cough.

Hope this can help you a bit and I hope your Mum has some answers today

Caution is needed with high doses of vit d, see link: www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/nutrition-and-healthy-eating/expert-answers/vitamin-d-toxicity/faq-20058108

SeaToSki · 14/02/2023 13:16

I definitely agree about the potential for problems from taking too much Vit D. It applies to zinc as well. Hence only suggesting OP takes a high dose for 5 days and then tapers. Most problems come from high doses for several months, as that article says. Cautious and occasion specific use of supplements is the best policy.

Fearsheisdying · 14/02/2023 18:55

Some great news - her colonoscopy was clear. No signs of any growths or polyps, so no idea what the shadow/lump is they kept refering too! Some not so great news is that she can't come home as her bloods are not ok, inflamation is high and slightly fast heat rate. Her covid test 2 days ago was negative but there was a positive case in her ward bay at the weekend (suspect this is where I've picked it up) so will see what tomorrow brings 🤞

OP posts:
Nimbostratus100 · 14/02/2023 19:02

great news! Ive been waiting for your update. Lets hope the problem can be found and sorted now xx

SirVixofVixHall · 14/02/2023 19:03

That is really good news OP . I am so relieved for you and your Mum.
Do they have any ideas why high inflammation etc ? Is it related to her RI ?

Crumpetdisappointment · 14/02/2023 19:06

good news about the colonoscopy
hope the blood is a harmless issue Flowers

LifeIsJustOneBigWTAF · 14/02/2023 19:09

Great news about the colonoscopy coming back clear. You've had a horrible wait, it must be such a relief. Sorry to hear your mum is still poorly though, will keep her in my thoughts and prayers x

Asiama · 14/02/2023 19:27

That is great news, I'm so happy for you! I've been thinking about you every day and it bright back memories from my mum. I hope they are able to find some answers for you.

Englishash · 14/02/2023 19:32

That's wonderful news! Hopefully they'll soon get to the bottom of what ails your mum and you'll all be home and back to some kind of normality very soon.

RobertsRadio · 14/02/2023 19:35

Been following and was so pleased to hear the colonoscopy was clear, especially after all the delays.

moggiek · 14/02/2023 19:40

That is wonderful news. How is her pain now?

Fearsheisdying · 14/02/2023 19:46

Thank you so much to you all for staying with me through this, you have helped me remain sane! She was very upset at having to stay in as she thought the clear colonoscopy results would be the end of it and she's understandably desparate to go home.

@SirVixofVixHall they're not sure. Her inflammation markers were up when all of this started, so I called to speak to the Nurse in charge to see if she could tell me the numbers but she wasn't available. No one has mentioned if they have stayed elevated throughout this ordeal. I will try again tomorrow and see what they say. I hadn't thought of her arthritis being a possble cause for that. They said her heart rate could be from the mild sedation they gave her for the scope

OP posts:
LuluBlakey1 · 14/02/2023 20:04

That's such good news. I am really pleased for you. Being in limbo is terrible. Here's to your mum getting better at home soon. X

CoffeeThisInstant · 14/02/2023 20:09

I’m sorry if this has already been mentioned - was there any sign of diverticular disease during the colonoscopy? If I’m having a flare up my inflammation markers rocket.
I hope your mum gets home soon.

GimmeBiscuits · 14/02/2023 22:30

Been following your posts and am so glad that you have a positive outcome here.
I think a pp mentioned diverticulitis (or related issue). I have a family member who suffers with this and some flare-ups result in back pain and tenderness at the bottom of the ribs.
Hopefully now they have eliminated worst case scenario they can work out what is likely to have been causing the issue.

Strictlyfanoftenyears · 14/02/2023 22:38

Forgooodnesssakenow · 11/02/2023 11:21

And you think the medical professionals haven't discussed the other options available? Their relative risks and benefits? You think they're just going, no, more laxatives lalalalalalla?

For many elderly patients more invasive procedures and the risks of those, infection, shock, blood loss, anaemia, poor healing, blood pressure changes, meds the patient takes such as diabetes meds, blood thinners etc can all complicate a decision. Also the risk of some cancers metastisising if incorrectly operated on. There are many good reasons to be conservative in their approach especially with a very deeply person. And no, 16 days isn't that ridiculous while she's an in patient with constant monitoring and available medical care in emergency situation

Didnt the op say her mum was 62? Thats not elderly?

AlleycatMarie · 14/02/2023 22:45

That’s wonderful news OP!! Most of these shadows are bowel obstructions that pass with some medical management. Cancer is always a possibility and doctors can mention it (as an alternative diagnosis) so matter of factly that it can sound like a foregone conclusion.
This is why it was so important to hold off doing anything more drastic until a successful colonoscopy could be performed.
Really hope your mum can be discharged soon!

uncomfortablydumb53 · 14/02/2023 22:50

Wonderful news OP
Raised inflammation marker's doesn't necessarily indicate anything serious, by the way

Sugarfree23 · 14/02/2023 23:41

Fab new Op, hopefully she's on the road to recovery.

Anycrispsleft · 15/02/2023 04:56

Ah that's fantastic news, I'm so pleased for you both. Keeping my fingers crossed that your mum is out soon, she must be desperate to get back home by now.

CrunchyCarrot · 15/02/2023 07:32

Yes having rheumatoid arthritis can certainly raise CRP. Glad to hear the colonoscopy hasn't revealed any problems, that's great news. :)

Cakeyface123 · 15/02/2023 10:03

Has the pain gone now? Did they establish what had caused that?

Really happy to hear the outcome (so far) and it seems positive x

ExistenceOptional · 15/02/2023 10:13

@Strictlyfanoftenyears Risks of different interventions starts to stack up.

ExistenceOptional · 15/02/2023 10:15

I am glad to hear this looks like a good outcome. Most bowel obstructions are not cancer and I am glad your mum's is one with a good outcome.

BornBlonde · 15/02/2023 13:37

Wonderful update but I hope they get to the root cause DaffodilWineFlowers