How can she be left like this? Take her back to A&E?

[Fearsheisdying]

Posting for traffic has honestly I'm terrified something is seriously wrong with my Mum and don't know what to do so please be nice.

Last week she started with some pain that she says feels like it's right at the very bottom of her ribs and radiating round the sides. She was in agony, basically screaming with pain so I took her to A&E on the advice of 111. All obs and ECG were normal but the blood tests were abnormal. They were going to do a CT scan but then decided as her obs were ok and they didn't think there was a bleed as no fall/injury, they were not going to do a CT scan there but would refer it to the GP to arrange BUT because of the blood test results and recent weightloss, they wanted it done urgently under the "2 week rule" and from his grave tone, I highly suspect he thinks it's cancer and serious. They couldn't/wouldn't give her anymore painkillers because of the painkillers she's on for severe arthritis but these are not touching the pain.

Fast forward to today, she has been in absolute agony since Thursday and seems worse today and can barely move. She's exhausted and crying/screaming in pain. My sister called 999 today but they said as not life threatening they won't send an ambulance but had to speak to GP within an hour. GP receptionist tried to say no appointments so we couldn't speak to GP but after I explained the issue (and she could hear my Mum crying out in pain) she finally agreed to pass a message to the GP so currently waiting to see if GP will call back today or not. Mum says if I take her back to A&E we'll be sat for hours again and nothing will be done but I can't just sit here and watch her in so much pain and do nothing.

What do I do?! Do I make her let me take her to A&E? Do we wait to see if the GP will call? Just feel so helpless

It may simply be because A and E was totally overwhelmed and the scan was not physically possible at that point.

I personally don't see any harm in asking questions via PALS. It's not about personal attacks on the nhs. It's about the more people who are happy with a sub par service the more it becomes the norm.

If you had a dog and it was writhing around howling in pain and your friends and family showed concern because the dog is suffering. Imagine rebutting that concern with "it's OK, the vet said come back in two weeks". That wouldn't be socaily acceptable so why is it OK for a human? Why is it OK for the next person who presents like Ops mum? "Oh most people just soilder on through the pain without complaining and wait their turn"

The nhs is becoming like God. It taboo to say its not perfect.

OP I'm sorry it's not better news. Keep advocating for you mum and look after yourself too

Sorry to hear DMs results.
hopefully they can reduce the pain and decide on next steps following colonoscopy 💐

How could the scan not be physically possible? They have a CT machine, they have a patient in need of the scan.

Slightly off topic maybe but not all CT machines suit all patients. My Mum was admitted for severe back pain and she couldn’t lie down - the pain was so severe- and due to her copd they didn’t want to anaesthetise her, so she had to wait to be transferred to another hospital where they had a sort of CT machine where she could go into it sitting up. It took a week or so to organise.

I think some of you don't understand the two week rule - it's not come back in two weeks. It is hopefully being diagnosed and treated within two weeks. @Fearsheisdying concentrate on your Mum right now - as regards putting in a complaint there is plenty time for that . Wishing you well.

I hope she manages to get some relief. What a worrying update. They may say 2 weeks but with the pain your DM is in I would hope they get her seen sooner. Keeping everything crossed for you both x

Sorry to read your last update, OP. Thinking of you and your mum at what must be a very scary time. I hope you get some answers very soon. You sound like a wonderful daughter.

Thank you all so much for your kind thoughts and well wishes. She now has an apt for the camera thingy (sorry, can't remember for the life of me what it's called) the Dr did the best he could but it is still 2 weeks away. We've said she can do last minute cancellations but understand it's not that easy as she has to have the stuff to "clear out" for a couple of days before.

My deepest fear is that @CristinaNov182 is right and that it's already advanced but kicking me while I'm down and telling me I should not have taken her is not helpful

*taken her home

Really hope she gets the appointment soon, I believe it's a colonoscopy. Really hope the oramorph will help x

Sending thoughts, OP. You must be exhausted

@Fearsheisdying You cant please every fucker Incidentally i wonder where the "competitive not going to A&E" posters are now. Probably got busy with their fingers in their rush to name change which means they have got their finger out from where they usually keep it.

Hope they are suitably ashamed of themselves.

I'm so sorry you are all going through a worrying time. If it brings any hope, my mum went through a similar experience including the pain you describe, it was very advanced bowel cancer that had started to spread. She had two major surgeries and lots of chemo, and fifteen years later is still cancer free. We didn't think she would survive but here we are!

I think by camera you mean a colonoscopy. She will be sedated for it so will need someone to drive her home afterwards and ideally if you can, stay with her overnight at home just to keep an eye on her.

Surely they can’t send your mum home when she’s in so much pain and they suspect cancer may be causing the pain

can you say your not taking her home op?
surely if she’s tried the one they gave her without much relief, I’d want her to have the dose they have prescribed in hospital first to see if it lowers the pain otherwise she’s still in the same position again !

your poor mum I bet she’s knackered and exhausted not to mention the pain

surely they can do an emergency camera thing ? To wait 2 weeks is unacceptable in pain

Take good care of you as well in all the worry. For the colonoscopy ask if using sudocream would be ok to help with the preparation in case of soreness. Wishing all the best

Don’t meet trouble half way, pain doesn’t mean it’s advanced. Been through similar with my dad. Make sure you eat and sleep, look after yourself and sending warm wishes to your mum. You’ve done well to advocate for her needs, keep doing that.

Mine too. When my friend had it, he was in absolute agony. The pain came on very suddenly, too. He was blaming my chilli for his indigestion one minute and screaming in agony a few minutes later.

Have been thinking about you both today. You have both had such a tough time of it and you have been brilliant, getting the help your Mum needed

How is your Mum's pain now, is it better controlled with the increase in the dose of oromorph ?
Hopefully you will all be back home soon. It might be worth checking before you leave if you haven't already, what they suggest you do if the situation deteriorates again, do they want you to come in via A&E again ?

If she’s comfortable on oramorph then she’s probably best off at home at the moment. Please don’t doubt that you’ve done the right thing 💐

Meant to say, talk to your pharmacist about potential stool softeners etc - oramorph can cause constipation which is the last thing she needs x

🙄

I hope your mum gets sorted soon OP.

@Asiama that's amazing!! I pray (not religious but I'll give anything a go!) if it is cancer we have a similar outcome. She's only 62 and we're not ready to lose her yet!

Yes, colonoscopy, that's the one. I'll take her and Dsis will stay with her. Will ask re sudo creme and add a stool softener to the shopping list. Will keep checking for cancellations for the colonoscopy too.

I've had a cry in the shower and now ready to get a good night sleep. Trying to stay positive, as hard as it is x

When she has the colonoscopy, she'll have to take laxative tablets the day before; which will clear her out completely.

Yes we have to pick up some stuff that she needs to take for 2 days prior to having it done.

I'll be letting my work know what's going on tomorrow incase I need to move any appointments around. Just wondering if there's anything else I'm forgetting!