Family comes first surely ?

[Pinkchenille]

4 years ago my friend started a cleaning business. My mum was looking for a cleaner so I gave her my friends number . After 18 months or so she started to clean for my mums ndn too.

My mum has always had the opinion that if you want something you work for it so isn’t very forthcoming with helping out when I’ve struggled but my youngest is now in full time school so I wanted to work but I’ve not been able to for years due to some medical issues . I said to my mum would she consider letting me be her cleaner and as she has that kind of work ethic opinion mentioned above she was happy to do this as she would be helping me out but I wouldn’t be doing nothing in return.

she gave her cleaner (my friend) notice and I’ve now been cleaning for her a few weeks . Her ndn is one of her best friends as they’ve lived there for over 30 years and she had been talking to her and ndn has now given notice and asked me will i clean for her too (she’s aware of my medical issues and knows this will make throngs easier for me I’ve known her years and it was her suggestion)

My friend (well I’m not sure if she is anymore) has accused me of poaching her clients !!! But I’m not . They had given notice and yes I asked my mum but i didn’t approach her ndn. She’s says I shouldn’t have asked my mum but it’s my mum and surely family comes first especially given my circumstances 😞

You sound selfish. Me me me.

Your friend is down 2 lots of income because you've taken 2 of her clients. I'm not surprised she's annoyed.
I understand why you've done it but I can see her point of view as well.

I might have done the same as you but you have poached her clients so at least admit it (even if only to yourself) and recognise why she’s a bit miffed

Look, it’s fine - your mum wanted to help you out and her friend did too. That’s great for you.

But try to understand why your friend is irritated by it. Don’t get all defensive and ‘But, but, but’ - you did ‘poach’ 2 of her clients.

As I’ve said due to my medical conditions work is hard to find and this is the easiest way to immediately get more money

Your friend isn’t running a business fgs. She’s a self-employed (freelance, if you prefer) cleaning lady.

If she were “running a business” she wouldn’t be miffed at you. She’s deploy her advertising skills, marketing skills, to drum up as much new business as possible to plug the gap in her annual budget. She would know that shit happens in “business”, and be prepared for and accept competition.

She’s being a loon. Get on with your life.

This.

also I assume you’re declaring this income to HMRC?

Oh FGS, your friend is being ridiculous.

And if she sounds off about it, I'd let her get on with it.

I don't think you've done anything wrong. It's your mum and of course she's gonna give you work over your mate! And if her NDN wants to employ you too, that's up to her.

So you're not insured? Are you registered as a business? Planning on paying tax etc, or is this a wee 'cash in hand thing'?

You can have who you like to your cleaning. Your mums choice.

You missed my (and everyone else's) point. You did willingly and deliberately take work away from this friend - AKA you poached her clients.

However perfect this job may be for you, you still took work - income - away from her.

So entitled.

Of course she is not being ridiculous. OP stole two of her friends clients. She cost her income.
Her mother can choose who she want, obviously. But you have to be a total fool not to see why would upset a friend by stealing her clients and costing her money.

I just needed some extra to cover electric and food this was the easiest way.

It’s not declared as my mums said technically the money is what most parents would gift to help out but she has the rule that you work for money but I consider it a gift. So then for her ndn if I count that as earned then it’s less than £1000 a year so not taxable

Yes and a good friend would understand OPs circumstances and not mention it.

Alternatively, if she wants to bang on about it then OP I'd suggest you give her the heave ho.

Your mum and her ndn are free to do as they please

You stole her clients, whether she was given notice or not is irrelevant. It was a sneaky and unkind thing to do.

They both gave notice

I mean, if I was your mum I'd hire you instead of your friend to help you out.
If I was your friend I would understand losing your mum as a customer in this situation.
It's losing the ndn that's the kicker here. How does your friend know you won't poach other customers from her? Presumably you know where else she cleans.

Still shitty situation for your friend though.

I hope you’ve registered as self employed and are declaring your earnings.

The fact that you refer to your mum and her ndn as 'clients' makes it seem you are starting your own cleaning business. On this basis YABU. You don't encourage people to let you sidle in to client 1 and 2 at the expense of your friend.
My dsis cleaned for me and also did my ironing for some years, I slipped her £30 a week to help her out.

You still have to declare the money to HMRC even if it's under the limit for tax. It's income from work so it has to be declared

If you’re on benefits you need to declare it as extra income.

It’s not a gift though is it, she was paying your former friend, and now she’s paying you the same amount for a service you are providing. Are you saying the ndn is gifting money to you too?

Well ideally I’d love to but I’m not sure if I’ll be able to due to medical reasons so this may be all i do but I want to see how I go