To be annoyed and angry with DH

[Topoftheworldtonight]

on a 2 night trip to London with DH and the kids. Our first day here. We’re still out now. Since it went dark earlier this evening DH has not stopped saying “we need to go back to the hotel”, “it’s too dark”, “it’s not safe” and so on. I’ve told him to stop and he won’t. Aibu to be angry and annoyed with him? We’re on our way back to the hotel now but earlier I had to keep explaining to him for hours that just because it’s dark we don’t have to go straight back to the hotel. He’s been making the same comments for hours and hours since it went dark

Why is your reply so aggressive to me? The OP hasn’t indicated her husband is ill. Some people are chronic worriers, that does not mean they are mentally ill. I don’t see what you find so controversial about that idea.

Yes I would. I'd put a coat on if it was cold. Does that help?

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Generalized_anxiety_disorder

You're not worth bothering with any further. Clearly you think men's mental health doesn't matter.

You are massively reaching here sorry. No one has underestimated problems with male mental health. On the information we have all read you believe the man has an anxiety disorder. Others don’t agree with you based on the same information. That doesn’t mean they are ignorant or dismissive of men’s mental health.

Why? Isn't the OP allowed feelings? You apparently feel 'sad' and you weren't even there! Why are your feelings allowed?

See my previous post.

My husbands like this. That's why I do the fun things without him.

Actually, it sounds more like he has Anticipatory Anxiety. Sufferers are always on guard to fear the worst. Some experts call it the Doomsday Disorder.

You may well be right; I'm not a doctor, and no-one on here can diagnose the DH from the OP's one-sided account. But even by that account, his behaviour is very clearly anxious, and well outside the normal parameters.

Still scratching my head at the logic of 'he's not been diagnosed, therefore he doesn't have a mental illness, therefore he doesn't need to go to the GP to get diagnosed' (@Eyerollcentral 's assorted posts)

It doesn’t sound like he has any mental illness. It sounds like he is a bit of worrier. Where does the OP say he is always on guard?!

Yes it does.

I didn’t say that though did I? I just disagree with you that the information points to a mental disorder. What the OP describes could just as easily describe someone who is prone to worrying. Statistically it’s of course much more likely that is the case.

@LordSugarTits

10.30 isn’t nearly midnight

hth

Should've clarified - I was responding to the poster who said it was GAD. I meant that IF he had any kind of mental illness, it sounds more like Anticipatory Anxiety. Like you say, OP hasn't said this was a pattern of behaviour – it could be just a one-off, triggered by coming to London.

Since it went dark earlier this evening DH has not stopped saying “we need to go back to the hotel”, “it’s too dark”, “it’s not safe” and so on. I’ve told him to stop and he won’t

This is from the OP. Its the only information we have. So yes, I am basing my views on the information provided because without doing so, there's no thread, is there?

Presumably you never post on threads because 'you weren't there' and so can't comment. And presumably you have no interest in what anyone else on a thread says, because they weren't there either. Which begs the question, why on you on Mumsnet?

@Eyerollcentral

No, it wasn't a joke. I don't think. But I typed that after just coming round from an op with lots of anaesthetic and ive just reread the whole thread and have no idea why I wrote that.

Ignore me.

thedancingbear's standard response across threads is aggression. He's just like that.

Ha ha ha ha!!! Hope your op went well!

Thanks for filling me in!

"😂 central London is perfectly safe, take it from Londoners who know what they’re talking about."

Until you're getting grabbed by some spice head who are all over the place in central London. Or caught up in the fights that happen every night. Or pickpocketed by the skanks that hang round Piccadilly and Kings Cross.

The OP is unreasonable for being angry at him and we don't have enough info really because she hasn't once said what the younger children wanted to do.

The level of tension for those kids is something both parents should've taken into account. One parent openly saying it's unsafe and he's scared, the other one fuming and posting on MN at 10.30 at night

The husband is unreasonable for saying it's not safe repeatedly in front of the kids. He felt unsafe though and scared and piling on to call him a wet wipe, moist, a wee petal, pathetic is just vile.

"10.30 isn’t nearly midnight

hth"

@LuckySantangelo35 it's fairly fucking close by the time they get back about an hour later. HTH 🙄🤣

How is 10.30 nearly midnight?! They weren't back an hour later either. OP posted at 10.28 to be pedantic and said they were at the hotel then.

Until you're getting grabbed by some spice head who are all over the place in central London.

I live in London and go into the centre regularly and I have yet to see a spice zombie anywhere. I think you're confusing London with Manchester.

Until you're getting grabbed by some spice head who are all over the place in central London. Or caught up in the fights that happen every night. Or pickpocketed by the skanks that hang round Piccadilly and Kings Cross.

OMG people actually think London is like this. I am howling with laughter. How have I lived here for 20 years without being grabbed by a spice head or caught up in a fight or pickpocketed by a "skank" in two of the tamest parts of the city.

In the London that I live in I have not seen any zombies, been pickpocketed, stabbed, mugged and don’t know anyone who has experienced anything like that either

Not saying it doesn’t exist but it is not widespread and some posters are making out and will just be as common in other parts of the country too

Lots of families are still out enjoying themselves late at night. Going for a late night snack after a show, stores are still open late and at this time of year seeing lights. 10.30 is no where near midnight and even if the OPs kids were still out at that time they are in holiday