Dh disapproves of coffee in bed?

[Yesterdaywasntreal]

Please help settle a disagreement. Early mornings with dcs are proving challenging atm, therefore I have suggested bringing our Dulce Gusto pod machine up to the bedroom. This will mean i can enjoy a quick coffee before the chaos starts, rather than during or not at all. Dh thinks it should stay in the kitchen "where it belongs." He says coffee in bed is lazy. AIBU or should I be a rebel?

I always wanted a teasmaid, this is a very tempting idea 😂

Honestly do whatever gets you through the day. Breaking 'the rules' and doing things just because they're nice is what life is all about. You don't need your husband's permission!

OH is up early and usually brings me tea (and sometimes a bacon roll). He won't join me as he hates eating in bed, finds it uncomfortable.

Once I'm up we usually have a tea together with something while we sort out what we're doing.

@FleeceDuvet I love that! What a great idea, that'll give dh something to really complain about.

DH has been bringing me a coffee in bed in the morning for 20+ years ago so I disagree with your DH! He's a morning person, I'm not!

Exactly! You need neither his approval nor his permission. You put your damn coffee machine wherever you want to!

@BigFatLiar oh a bacon roll on bed sounds heavenly. He doesn't approve of eating in bed either, for risk of crumbs 🙄

No 3. The "I have neither thought about nor understand this at all so it must not be true and I'll be rude while saying so".

I should make a bingo card.

If he’s not bothered about coffee, move the machine upstairs. Why’s he making a fuss about something that doesn’t affect him?

Coffee machine stays downstairs and he brings you a cup up, or coffee machine comes upstairs and he doesn’t have to. His choice!

Get a second coffee machine in the bedroom.

Don't the pods come with milk in them?

I'd do it. Why would you get out of bed to make coffee and go back, you may as well just stay up.

The thing is, YOU deal with the SHARED kids, he does 'extra work'. Therefore YOU get to decide what makes dealing with the shared kids easier for you tomeet the school run deadline. If HE doesn't like the idea of coffee machine in the bedroom then it is up to HIM to either provide the coffee YOU feel will things better for YOU or to share in the tasks with the kids to share the morning load better to enable you to have your coffee.

I'd probably be telling him it's happening to see if it improves things, unless he can come up with another solution - which will involve him changing what he does to support you.

And no appliances in the bedroom... he has no alarm clock then, no phone/tablet/kindle/Alexa or any other electronics? He's the one stuck in the 1970s!

Hi everyone, bring has decided that any point of view other than theirs is incorrect. You can all stop commenting on this thread now.

Has he never heard of a Teasmade? I'd have one if I could.

'If HE doesn't like the idea of coffee machine in the bedroom then it is up to HIM to either provide the coffee YOU feel will things better for YOU or to share in the tasks with the kids to share the morning load better to enable you to have your coffee.'

Yes he should, he will say he doesn't have time to deal with dcs or breakfast etc as "too busy with work" lying in bed on his work phone until last minute when he gets ready, and heads to office. Meanwhile I'm run ragged with dcs, one doesn't want to get ready or go to school and cries, big battle to get ready, other one doesn't want to go to help drop off. Then I look at time and it is rushing out door, forget my drink. Through the night his phone vibrates with emails etc and he will say he has put it on 'don't disturb.' 🤔

Hotels have tea and coffee making facilities in the boderoom so why on earth not. There is nothing lazy about drinking tea and coffee in bed. Is his objection because then there would be no coffee machine downstairs? If that's the case you can pick second hand ones up on marketplace or gumtree pretty cheaply.

My parents had a Teasmade in their bedroom and it was part of our upbringing. In the mornings, we were not allowed out of our bedrooms (other than to use the toilet) before the Teasmade's alarm went off.

Coffee in bed is fine, but I’m with the majority, I’d not want the ,machine the bedroom either. I did it once years ago and honestly the novelty wore off, it was just a faff with water, cups, pods, drips etc

think if my husband wanted to do it now I’d be a little resentful, not just the noise of him getting up and faffing with the coffee, waking me up, but the cleaning up , washing cups. Wiping drips up, filling water, replacing pods etc it’s just easier in the kitchen.

Over all you’re not selling him to us @Yesterdaywasntreal .

Maybe he should get more of his Very Important Work done during the working day and give you a hand getting kids up and out.

Amazing how some men have work that is Very Urgent at kids bedtime or getting ready in the morning time. Can be very handy for some.

How will the coffee machine being in your room affect him?

Is there a shelf in a wardrobe you can clear so it can be hidden away when not in use so he doesn't have to see it?

The only thing that would put me off is the clean/dirty mug rotation.

I don't like food or drink in bedrooms.

No objections on the lazy front but don't like the smell, crumbs or spillages.

My OH brings me a coffee up it's my only peace for a good 12 hours a day.

Never before have I had such a visceral “LTB!” reaction to a thread title alone.

YANBU. Coffee in bed in the morning is one of life’s small pleasures. I too have recently contemplated moving a coffee machine to the bedroom so I can enjoy
mine in peace without disturbing the kids and the dog, before my legion of small dependent creatures need my attention.

If DH thinks it’s lazy, he must be offering to pop down and make your morning coffee for you. How kind of him!

'Amazing how some men have work that is Very Urgent at kids bedtime or getting ready in the morning time. Can be very handy for some.''

Yes @HaggisBurger and he miraculously has time for a cycle during his lunch time. Morning he is "snowed under" then in evening he "hasn't made day." Hmmm