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Original poster

Lodger cranks up heating to 25

582 replies

Mumskisail · 05/01/2023 10:37

My partner left a few years ago and I had time off work for burnout and now in a less stressful (lower paid) role so on a tight income. I rent 2 rooms to help cover my mortgage and bills (about 40%).

The house is heated to 18-21 degrees depending on the room / personal preference, using Nest thermostats (called TRVs) on each radiator. It is lowered at 11pm until 5.30am, meaning it's warm for about an hour after going to bed and it heats up for a few hours before the lodgers get up.

One lodger is very happy with this and prefers a cooler room so sometimes turns it down.

But the other constantly overrides this and heats his room to 25. When I've tried to speak to him about it he answers his door in a tshirt and is only wearing normal socks. The rest of us have warm clothes, slippers and big fleece hoodies on winter evenings, and use fleece blankets to stay cosy on the sofa.

We seem to be in a battle of wills. He goes along with my suggested times and temperatures in discussion but has done everything including claiming his radiator and the TRV don't work, disconnecting the TRV but trying to make it look as though it's connected, saying it won't connect and pulling the little pin out with a pair of pliers to force the heating on. He leaves it on all night. The thermostat when it's reading says 25-26.

The other issue in this old Victorian house is that the heating pumping out all night causes banging in the pipes and keeps myself and the other lodger awake, or wakes us up in the night. So we prefer lots of layers and a quiet night unless we're in a cold patch.

I've offered him extra duvets and blankets (his looks thin) and a hot water bottle but he refuses. I've asked him to discuss the times he wants the heating on and to talk about the heating.

He says the temperature reading is wrong so I gave him a wireless thermostat which showed the same temperature as the TRV and showed it was correct.

I've explained about the increasing cost of gas and showed him my bills. I've showed him the temperatures in the rest of the house and that we are comfortable.

This is the second winter we are having these issues. Last year his sister died so I just kept my mouth shut and left him to it but I felt really unhappy.

Do I just suck it up, winter will be over soon and I'm not making a loss. Or do I tell him it's not acceptable and ask him to leave? Or is it better the devil you know, this is the only issue.

A friend suggested a locking cover to go over the TRV, I'm so irritated it's tempting but is that really ethical? And anyway would he then just get an electric heater? I don't go into his room and I would never snoop.

He's a 44 year old man having to rent a room and it must be his sanctuary and private space.

Do I just let him win the battle and chill out?

OP posts:
WhileMyGuitarGentlyWeeps · 05/01/2023 12:27

Calphurnia88 · 05/01/2023 12:20

@BradfordGirl do you pay your own utility bills?

If so, if you were at home and felt cold in just a t-shirt, would you put a jumper on or would you turn up the heating?

This. Most people would just put an extra layer - or two on, and snuggle up in a fleece blanket, not crank up the heating to f*cking 25C every time they feel 'a bit chilly.' Hmm It's all right for the bloody lodger, HE isn't paying the heating bill is he? Hmm

Soothsayer1 · 05/01/2023 12:27

It's clear that this person isn't going to back down and will refuse to comply, surely better to give him notice sooner rather than later before things become more adversarial and unpleasant.
Let him be someone else's problem!

beAsensible1 · 05/01/2023 12:28

Just ask him to contribute a bit more if he wants is warmer, i' honestly be shivering in a house at 18-21, i get really cold and wearing 16 layers at home is pure hell.

You'd all hate me, my heating is on at 28 most of the time!

HotChoxs · 05/01/2023 12:28

OooScotland · 05/01/2023 12:14

Having been a lodger for years myself the thing that sticks out for me is that you know an awful lot about the personal habits of your lodger. Lies on his bed in a t shirt eating sausage rolls? WTF. You should never have witnessed that to have an opinion on it.

He’s 44 years of age and you’re his landlady, not his mum, you need to stay out of his business. Comstantly talking to him about considering your budget, forcing him to look at the finer points of your bills, and telling him you expect him to wear fleeces, hoods and slippers and sit under blankets if he’s cold is unreasonable. Your are a homeowner with several income streams and he is a middle aged man renting your room, you can’t expect him to have any sympathy for you and your budget at all.

To be honest your house does sound proper cold (and your pipes are banging because you have air in the system, not because the heating is on when it ‘shouldn’t’ be, this will also be preventing the radiators from heating up properly and wasting money).

Trying to control his need to have a very warm room in any way won’t work - If you tamper proof the heating he will buy electric heaters and hide them. So simply tell him you’re putting the rent up or give him notice. You don’t have to have a pointless discussion about why.

Lodgers aren’t for everyone. I think you should consider making/saving money some other way. You say you have multiple lodgers so downsizing springs to mind. If your answer to that is you want the lodgers for company or you’re too attached to your big house that you can’t afford, you need to have a word with yourself.

Show quote history

I have to agree with this, once again this is someone who's taken on business responsibilities without treating as a business.

The fact you knew he wanted his room at 25 degrees and had at least 6 months to address this situation before it became a problem is important but seems that you're more interested in whether he eats sausage rolls or not than making sure the person who's paying to live in your property is able to live there.

MeMyBooksAndMyCats · 05/01/2023 12:28

I'd tell him if he's happy to pay an extra £150 pm for the gas usage then that's fine otherwise he needs to leave he's taking the piss.

BradfordGirl · 05/01/2023 12:32

@MeMyBooksAndMyCats There is no way heating 1 bedroom to the extra temperature costs that much. The lodger spends his evenings in his bedroom.

HotChoxs · 05/01/2023 12:32

WhileMyGuitarGentlyWeeps · 05/01/2023 12:26

Exactly. Some weird and daft posts on this thread. Imagine wrapping up in more layers when it's WINTER? Who DOES that? Oh the horror! 😫

Show quote history

What is people's problem in this thread? It's none of your business what they want to wear or not.

Cherrysoup · 05/01/2023 12:33

Sorry, he'd be gone. He persistently lies to you and is likely to break the Nest system if he carries on removing the pin.

TheDietStartsTomorrowOrMaybeTheDayAfter · 05/01/2023 12:33

Mumskisail · 05/01/2023 10:37

My partner left a few years ago and I had time off work for burnout and now in a less stressful (lower paid) role so on a tight income. I rent 2 rooms to help cover my mortgage and bills (about 40%).

The house is heated to 18-21 degrees depending on the room / personal preference, using Nest thermostats (called TRVs) on each radiator. It is lowered at 11pm until 5.30am, meaning it's warm for about an hour after going to bed and it heats up for a few hours before the lodgers get up.

One lodger is very happy with this and prefers a cooler room so sometimes turns it down.

But the other constantly overrides this and heats his room to 25. When I've tried to speak to him about it he answers his door in a tshirt and is only wearing normal socks. The rest of us have warm clothes, slippers and big fleece hoodies on winter evenings, and use fleece blankets to stay cosy on the sofa.

We seem to be in a battle of wills. He goes along with my suggested times and temperatures in discussion but has done everything including claiming his radiator and the TRV don't work, disconnecting the TRV but trying to make it look as though it's connected, saying it won't connect and pulling the little pin out with a pair of pliers to force the heating on. He leaves it on all night. The thermostat when it's reading says 25-26.

The other issue in this old Victorian house is that the heating pumping out all night causes banging in the pipes and keeps myself and the other lodger awake, or wakes us up in the night. So we prefer lots of layers and a quiet night unless we're in a cold patch.

I've offered him extra duvets and blankets (his looks thin) and a hot water bottle but he refuses. I've asked him to discuss the times he wants the heating on and to talk about the heating.

He says the temperature reading is wrong so I gave him a wireless thermostat which showed the same temperature as the TRV and showed it was correct.

I've explained about the increasing cost of gas and showed him my bills. I've showed him the temperatures in the rest of the house and that we are comfortable.

This is the second winter we are having these issues. Last year his sister died so I just kept my mouth shut and left him to it but I felt really unhappy.

Do I just suck it up, winter will be over soon and I'm not making a loss. Or do I tell him it's not acceptable and ask him to leave? Or is it better the devil you know, this is the only issue.

A friend suggested a locking cover to go over the TRV, I'm so irritated it's tempting but is that really ethical? And anyway would he then just get an electric heater? I don't go into his room and I would never snoop.

He's a 44 year old man having to rent a room and it must be his sanctuary and private space.

Do I just let him win the battle and chill out?

I would either put a lock on the Nest thermostat or say that he can pay an extra £50 a month (or whatever) and he can have the heating on a bit higher.

beAsensible1 · 05/01/2023 12:33

BradfordGirl · 05/01/2023 11:29

When you advertise for your next lodger. make it clear in the winter you expect them to wear a fleecy hoodie and use a fleece blanket to sit on the sofa so they are warm enough.

its really not normal, and in most other countries you don't sit round in layers and blankets in the winter, you heat the home adequately.

Living in new york during insane winters no one wears fleeces and gloves in the house unless something is broken.

durhamduck · 05/01/2023 12:34

WhileMyGuitarGentlyWeeps · 05/01/2023 12:26

Exactly. Some weird and daft posts on this thread. Imagine wrapping up in more layers when it's WINTER? Who DOES that? Oh the horror! 😫

Show quote history

Yes but realistically how are you going to enforce this with a 40 year old man? "Go to your room and change"?? "Lift up your sweater, no still too thin and not enough layers, naughty boy"... Why does OP keep going back to the layers point like she wants to be his nagging mum?

I think that most people are just saying in a landlord tenant relationship, it's more productive to focus on things that are contractually enforceable: temperature range, rent rates, notice etc. Whatever he does outside of that is his business no matter how ridiculous.

Onebelow · 05/01/2023 12:35

I could’ve written this about 5 years ago. I had a lodger who was like this. I’ve had 3 lodges in the past, each one at a different time as it’s only the one spare room that I have, two were great and one was like this. Heating on full whack in his room whilst he sat there in a tee shirt. He once set the fire alarm off up there! He placed a scented candle on the radiator and then switched the radiator on (full) and it all melted down the back of the radiator and down the wall and it was smoking! He came downstairs angry that his radiator was smoking and could’ve killed him! I went up to check and as I’m walking up the stairs I can smell the scented wax, didn’t take me long to figure out what had happened. So I disconnected his wall radiator, removed the fuse from it so it can’t be switched on, and gave him a little 500W plug in radiator. Even if he left it on 24/7 it still only cost me £4 a day, the radiator was nearer to £8 a day! It meant he could warm his room up, but not to the level of it feeling like Barbados up there!

BoogieBoogieWoogie · 05/01/2023 12:35

BradfordGirl · 05/01/2023 12:22

@Calphurnia88 Of course I pay my own bills and put a jumper on. But if you can afford it, 18 degrees is too low. And I am cold at that temperature with a jumper on.

18 degrees really is not low!

IncompleteSenten · 05/01/2023 12:36

I'd give him notice.
There are always people wanting to rent a room.
You dont need the hassle.
And yes, amend your agreements to include temperature settings and extra money to pay.

BradfordGirl · 05/01/2023 12:36

18 degrees is cold for most people. It is sitting on the sofa with a fleecy blanket temperature.

TimeForMeToF1y · 05/01/2023 12:37

BradfordGirl · 05/01/2023 12:22

@Calphurnia88 Of course I pay my own bills and put a jumper on. But if you can afford it, 18 degrees is too low. And I am cold at that temperature with a jumper on.

Too low for what?

Are you thinking everyone is the same as you? You don't need to be told that we're all different do you? Why would anyone turn their heating up higher than they need it just because they can afford to?

BradfordGirl · 05/01/2023 12:38

There are not always people wanting to rent a room, it depends where OP lives. The market is different in different places. Where I live there are more rooms advertised now than in the past and I know a friend who has lodgers has difficulty filling her room now.

Xenia · 05/01/2023 12:38

My son had shorts on the other day and bare feet and when I suggested warmer clothes he did put some on (our heating had just gone off for the day as it is mild). This lodger sounds like not worth the trouble. Just give him notice to leave and find another one. Make sure the agreement for future lodgers refers to temperatures and/or provide for higher payment if they want to be hotter.

Flapjackquack · 05/01/2023 12:38

BradfordGirl · 05/01/2023 12:32

@MeMyBooksAndMyCats There is no way heating 1 bedroom to the extra temperature costs that much. The lodger spends his evenings in his bedroom.

Do you know how heating works? If the lodgers room is 25 degrees and the rest of the house is 18-21 degrees the warmer air will just move towards the cooler air meaning the boiler will constantly be working to maintain that stupidly high temperature for that room.

As an aside, I just checked the temperature of the room I’m in. It’s 19 degrees (it gets a lot of sun). I am sat here in leggings, socks and a long sleeved top with sleeveless vest underneath, perfectly warm.

HotChoxs · 05/01/2023 12:38

Seriously people should just jog on in this thread unless they've rented rooms.

BradfordGirl · 05/01/2023 12:39

@TimeForMeToF1y The OP herself wears a fleecy hoodie over her clothes and has a fleecy blanket to sit on the sofa. She would feel cold with normal clothes.

StrawberryWater · 05/01/2023 12:39

Give him his notice and ask him to leave.

He’s going against the wishes of the whole house, is increasing your bills and not covering the extra expense and he’s removing the TRVs from the radiator without permission and probably damaging them in the process.

He can go annoy someone else.

BradfordGirl · 05/01/2023 12:41

@Flapjackquack A plug in oil filled radiator would be the best way to heat one room. But you can set the temperature for the boiler lower in other rooms and high in one room.

Advicerequest · 05/01/2023 12:42

I'd ask him to leave as you can't trust him and is disrespectful

saleorbouy · 05/01/2023 12:43

Check that the radiator is bled of air and make sure the central heating system is properly balanced. In some cases the radiators higher up in the house or last on the circuit can be much colder than the others. Balancing the system by reducing flow to the hotter rads allows the heat distribution should become equal. (There are YouTube videos showing how to do this correctly)
If the system is working fine then ask him to contribute more or ask him to move on.

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