Lodger cranks up heating to 25

[Mumskisail]

My partner left a few years ago and I had time off work for burnout and now in a less stressful (lower paid) role so on a tight income. I rent 2 rooms to help cover my mortgage and bills (about 40%).

The house is heated to 18-21 degrees depending on the room / personal preference, using Nest thermostats (called TRVs) on each radiator. It is lowered at 11pm until 5.30am, meaning it's warm for about an hour after going to bed and it heats up for a few hours before the lodgers get up.

One lodger is very happy with this and prefers a cooler room so sometimes turns it down.

But the other constantly overrides this and heats his room to 25. When I've tried to speak to him about it he answers his door in a tshirt and is only wearing normal socks. The rest of us have warm clothes, slippers and big fleece hoodies on winter evenings, and use fleece blankets to stay cosy on the sofa.

We seem to be in a battle of wills. He goes along with my suggested times and temperatures in discussion but has done everything including claiming his radiator and the TRV don't work, disconnecting the TRV but trying to make it look as though it's connected, saying it won't connect and pulling the little pin out with a pair of pliers to force the heating on. He leaves it on all night. The thermostat when it's reading says 25-26.

The other issue in this old Victorian house is that the heating pumping out all night causes banging in the pipes and keeps myself and the other lodger awake, or wakes us up in the night. So we prefer lots of layers and a quiet night unless we're in a cold patch.

I've offered him extra duvets and blankets (his looks thin) and a hot water bottle but he refuses. I've asked him to discuss the times he wants the heating on and to talk about the heating.

He says the temperature reading is wrong so I gave him a wireless thermostat which showed the same temperature as the TRV and showed it was correct.

I've explained about the increasing cost of gas and showed him my bills. I've showed him the temperatures in the rest of the house and that we are comfortable.

This is the second winter we are having these issues. Last year his sister died so I just kept my mouth shut and left him to it but I felt really unhappy.

Do I just suck it up, winter will be over soon and I'm not making a loss. Or do I tell him it's not acceptable and ask him to leave? Or is it better the devil you know, this is the only issue.

A friend suggested a locking cover to go over the TRV, I'm so irritated it's tempting but is that really ethical? And anyway would he then just get an electric heater? I don't go into his room and I would never snoop.

He's a 44 year old man having to rent a room and it must be his sanctuary and private space.

Do I just let him win the battle and chill out?

It's miserable to be cold at home. He lives there! It's his home! Why on earth should he be forced to be cold just because OP prefers to be cold?!

He's heating a single room, there's no issue with that.

Love the idea that the heating has to be off overnight because it's too noisy 👌

OP just charge him a bit extra per month to cover it. £50 pm over the winter months should be reasonable.

But it sounds like it's beyond you since the noise of it being on annoys you so much

Tell him to go. Seriously.

stop being a doormat. You’ve told him until you’re blue in the face not to override your thermostat and he’s not listening

he’s a lodger so you can tell him to go with immediate effect, but you can give him a week to go and that’s more than fair.

Good gosh, let's not make this into a debate about the lodger's human right to wear a t-shirt.

Surely it's common sense that if it's cold, and you're in a t-shirt, you put a jumper on before turning on/up the heating?! Particularly when utilities prices have increased exponentially.

Yes you can, doesn’t negate the rules of thermodynamics.

Honestly I'd tell him to go, because if he will faff with (and possibly break) the TRVs, then what else will he feel entitled to faff with?

Bet his ex has some lovely stories about him.

Seriously. Jog on. Its common sense when your lodger wants to wear a t-shirt in their room at 25 degrees and you know about this, you don't let them do this one year then change the goalposts on them the next winter when you know prices are going up and you've got at least 6 months to address the situation with a rent increase or allow them to move to somewhere they're comfortable.

People in this Country really are selfish and we deserve the health system to fail.

Well that escalated quickly…

WTAF are you going on about? Serious question.

Yeah well it should. People commenting about him wanting to wear a t-shirt instead of her poorly insulated victorian house. Maybe he can go off to a newbuild and find a landlord that doesn't make their life a misery over winter.

I agree that OP should have addressed this sooner, although I suspect this would have resulted in lodger moving out a lot sooner. Which probably would have been best for both of them since they are clearly a bad fit.

People in this Country really are selfish

Yes, but the way I see it, it is the lodger who is behaving selfishly. Unless OP is withholding a conversation with the lodged where he offered to pay to cover the extra heating bills, he is currently expecting her to fund the extra heating for him (and also damaging her property by the sounds of it) because he cba, and doesn't have, to put a jumper on. A simple act which millions of people will be doing across the UK right now because there is a well publicised cost of living crisis.

Those saying people shouldn’t have to be cold in their own home, must be kept yummy mummies. The rest of us as slogging away to pay our energy bills, there’s an energy cost crisis right now and lots of people can’t afford to heat their own home. It’s cute that you’re privileged and kept tho. Must be nice in that bubble.

@Mumskisail I've had lodgers since 2013, I've only had to ask one to go, and that was similar to this; she'd crank the thermostat up to 28C and sit in the lounge in her pjs all day. You've moved to a lower stress job, move to a lower stress lodger. I cannot tell you the sheer relief I felt after asking her to leave and then when she was gone.

If he's an arse to the level of removing the TRVs etc, he's an arse about other things, get gone. You'll have no problem filling the room and it will be such a hassle off your plate!

@Leethos I'm assuming Nest is similar to Hive which is the one I'm familiar with, as well as a Hive thermostat (in the hall, now pretty redundant) you have a Hive smart TRV on each radiator, you can then set a specific schedule for each radiator/room, and it uses heat on demand so 'calls' for heat and switches on the boiler as and when needed.

For all PP saying they won't layer up in their own home, I'm just flabbergasted.

I suppose we are all different regarding heat levels, but if you are the one paying the bills that's of no concern for anyone else.

However, if you are providing accommodation for others, a reasonably warm room is the minimum. Very few people have the heating on at 25 overnight to my knowledge anyway. Surely people are heading off to bed then. If not, at that stage of the day/night a heated blanket on the bed is great.

Some people are just stubborn and he may be resentful of the fact that he is renting a room in YOUR larger house. He probably sees you as minted on his dollar and is determined to get value for his buck.

It is not reasonable IMV. The heat you provide is adequate, not miserly at all, and his use of excessive heat overnight is a piss take.

You have two choices. One, get rid asap. Two, add a chunk to his rent. Only you can decide which is better for you in the long run.

Think you need to serve him notice.

Are you flaming serious. Are people so illiterate that they think it's a good idea to address this situation in winter when it becomes a problem, and not in July or August when you know it's going to be one? Then start moaning about him wanting to wear a t-shirt when you knew he wanted to and didn't ask for a rent raise to cover it.

What kind of lunacy is this?

You think another landlord is going to be happy with their lodger cranking the heating up to 25C because they can't be fucked to put a jumper on?

And you think because someone has a newbuild that it won't be cold with no heating on???

All the LOLz. You're serious and all aren't ya?

The fact he's an arse doesn't make the OP any less of an arse, but regardless he should be allowed to wear a t-shirt by virtue of the fact that she didn't make an issue of it until winter and had plenty of time to address it.

Her fault, not his.

I agree. And instead criticise him for lying on his bed and eating a sausage roll for his tea. Which is none of her business.

Kick him out!

@Mumskisail put it this way, if you’ve been on mumsnet for any more than 5minutes, you’ll know the utter shit some women will put up with for their ‘D’Ps.

I know everyone says MN is all about the LTB, but you know that if it’s bad enough to start a thread about, most of the time it’s BAD.

so some woman had a kid with this guy and for whatever reason got rid of him.

and now you’re seeing how underhanded and immature he is and it’s costing you money.

are you more dumb than the unfortunate who had a kid with him? No, you’re not.

”Lodger,

we've spoken on numerous occasions about the heating and how you are not to increase the temperature at night.

as mentioned, 25c is too hot and ensures the boiler runs all night to heat your room, clanking and disturbing the rest of us.

in addition there is a huge cost to this.

I do not want the heating changed again. Consider this the very last warning. If I see the heating has again been over-ridden, I will be serving you immediate notice to leave. You will then need to find alternative accommodation as soon as possible. I will be flexible as far as possible, but you leaving my house will be in days not weeks.

thanks in advance
@Mumskisail

U OK hun? You seem very angry. Taking this all very personally and seriously. Are you a lodger who has turned the heating up high , coz you CBA to put a cardi on? And your landlord has turned it down???

Maybe you should tweet or email the daily mail, you may get a sad compo face article published. Could get £100 for it... Help the landlord pay for the heating bill! Everybody wins. 😝

The noise is only happening because OP is not doing basic maintenance.

Yeah it would cost me an extra quid a day to get the room to that level so I'd set the rent at an extra £40 a month, not difficult.

I wouldn't have him in for tinkering with stuff though, but this really isn't rocket science is it.

No, I'm a former landlord that's sick of cowboys.
Are you ok? You seem a little... odd

@HotChoxs That seems very sensible.